just some thoughts.

Apr 07, 2013

we went out a lot this weekend. usually the kids stay at the grandparents place every couple weeks. its been a couple months and we really needed some 'date' time. so last night we went to sushi, which was wonderful. it's my favourite food in town. i overate though. was it because it had been so long and it tasted that good? is it because of habit - overeating is kind of my usual thing with sushi. i'll have to change that. i wonder if i'll be able to have sushi at all when all is said and done.

then we went for lunch today. we had a gift card to this new local restaurant, not fancy, but nice. i had roast beef, green beans, mashed potato.. it was really, really good. then i had dessert. oh, the desserts in this place, so many to choose from! cheesecake, bread pudding, sticky toffee pudding, apple crisp - pretty much all of my favourites. i had a hard time choosing, i wanted them all, and i'm salivating just thinking of it.

why?

i think i'm going to have to get the whys figured out if i'm going to beat this addiction. i mean it might be a number of things. it's possible that i can never again have the bread pudding i had today.. i feel oddly mourning. i think the most challenging thing about obesity isn't the food itself but what's attached to it. it's not like bread pudding is a friend i'm losing. it's just a tasty food. but then why mourn the loss?

i'm thinking of getting some cognitive-behavioural books. if anyone has recommendations, let me know.

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