Support Group Epiphany (repost from main board)

May 22, 2013

Putting this here for posterity.

I just got back from a fabulous support group and wanted to share my epiphany with you all in case it helps anyone else.

I met with my surgeon earlier today, and while he is pleased with my progress, it could be better and I am nearing 5 months out with at least 40 lbs left to lose if I want a healthy BMI.  He really wants me to maximize my weight loss NOW so that I don't have to struggle as much to get to goal, and he is concerned that getting to goal will be very difficult for me.

I spent the afternoon processing while I ran errands and attended a school event for my daughter.  I didn't think I'd make it to group, but every time I go I learn something valuable, so I dropped my family off at home and went to group a little late.

I'd been thinking all afternoon about what to do differently to take off as much weight as possible in the next few months.  Basically, I know what I need to do, but struggle because I keep telling myself I need to find balance.  I have to live my life in the real world, sometimes stuff happens, etc.

Tonight at group someone (either Elina or Kairk, maybe both) said something that finally made something click in my brain.

There is no balance during weight loss.

It's great that I want to have my whole family eat the same thing, and that I want my food to taste delicious AND be healthy, or whatever.  But right now, during weight loss, my job is to hit my protein goal and eat vegetables with as few calories as possible.

You know what doesn't help if that is my job?  Balance. 

So, moving forward, I'm ditching the cheese.  Cheese is certainly delicious, and light string cheese is easy, but it is not the leanest source of protein (nor is it carb free).  There are other small things I can tweak here and there to move the calorie and carb count down as far as possible.  Will they result in the most delicious meals?  No.  But I think I have to stop caring for now.

This is not forever.  It is until I get to goal.  Once I am in maintenance I will have the rest of my life to find balance.  Until then, screw it.

I know there are people who will disagree with me, and I certainly think that this would not work for everyone.  If I had more than 40-50 lbs left I'm not sure I could do it.  And I'm sure I'll screw up.  But I need to be hyper-focused until I get where I'm going.  Hopefully, I'll get there in the next 4 months.  I don't think that's an unreasonable goal to set.

And that's what I learned today. :)

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