Amanda D.

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My PCP is sending my WLS reccommendation letter THIS WEEK!!!! Horray!  He is what I've been waiting for.  I am so excited.  Any day now the WLS program should have all of my papers and I can move forward.  I'm excited and suddenly scared, but it's ok!  It is going to happen!

So, I'm down 15 lbs since May 11.  I was weighed for the first time in so long at my education class.  A few years.  First time I wasn't too fat for a scale. 

This is the sweetest success I've ever tasted.

and I didn't have to suck it in!  I have always had to in these pants.  Not today.  I could sit very comfortably.

I refuse to get on a scale that will register my fat butt.  When I do, I will be forced to see a number.  Until then, I will count today as a weight loss win!

I can't wait until my education class.  I think by then I will be all ready for surgery...then it's waiting for insurance/surgeon appointments.

I am going to Maryland this week.  It's like a little vacay!  I need a break.  

I think the Meridia my PCP has me on is screwing with my head.  I'm feeling up then down all the time.  My dreams have gone batty, and it takes me some time in the morning to come down from it.  I think my brain is having to work super hard for some reason.  I can't remember dream details, and I always have been able to before.  I keep thinking it will pass, and it hasn't.  I don't know if I should call or just keep going.  It's just two more weeks.

May 3.  That's when I don't have to take it anymore.  I go back to the PCP for my recommendation letter.  I can't wait.  It is also the day before my birthday.  It will be like a nice pesent to have that letter. 

I'm trying to remember to write here more often.  My thoughts are flying around my head right now, but nothing is seeming to come together.  It's very frustrating.

I have a date for my education class!  May 11!  I am so excited...

So, I've started a new job.  I am the Camp Coordinator for the NC State Future Engineers Summer Camp.  Sounds fancy, eh?  I like it.  It gives me a lot of professional freedom, and I enjoy it quite much.  I'm hoping that I can have surgery while working.  I don't have vacation or sick time, but I think I could be able to work from home, if it's fine with my supervisors (I have 4 or so, haha).

Nothing has been happening surgery related.  I've got to take Meridia until May 3, and then my doctor will give me a letter saying he is down with the surgery.  In the mean time, I'm going back on Monday for the results of my psychiatric evaluation.  I don't like the counselor I saw.  I felt like she was condescending and non-supportive.  I guess I will see what happens.  I'm not nervous.  If she chooses no, I just choose to not release the records to the surgeon, it's that easy.  I doubt she will though.  She implied to my husband, my support person, that she thought it would be good for me.  I still need to return the information packet.  I will fax that Thursday from work.  Hopefully I can sign up for an education class soon and be finished.  I need to have a thyroid panel and physical, but I can do that when I go to the doctor on May 3...one day before my brithday!  I've been wondering a lot lately what it's going to feel like, how much it's going to hurt, and what I will look like when it's finished.  This is like the month of December.  I know what's coming at the end of it, but getting there is taking so long!

American Idol is on.  I love Casey James.  I like Mike too.  And Didi.  She is just stunning.