Annabelui

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It's been one year and two days since I had the laproscopic rue-en-y. I've lost just over 100 pounds!  I feel GREAT! I go tanning once a week, and a few weeks ago, I had tried out a new salon. There were mirrors opposite the tanning bed, and when I opened the bed as I was getting out, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I suddenly realized that my stomach curved inward instead of outward! I couldn't move for about 3 minutes! I was just so happy to see my new, attractive body in the mirror! I ran over to my boyfriend's house, stripped off all my clothes, laid on the bed and said, "Hunny, look at THIS!" My life is so wonderful! I still have trouble sometimes, I still think of myself as a "fat girl", but my boyfriend is super supportive and reminds me all the time what a beautiful woman I've become. Sometimes it's just so hard to believe that I'm not 300+ pounds anymore! I've had some big changes in the past year - I've had the surgery, I got clean & sober, and I've found the love of my life. I see great things for me in my future - I'm going back to school in the fall to get my degree, among other things. My life truly is blessed, and it all began with this surgery. Thanks so much to Dr. Peter Rantis and the staff at Alexian Brothers Elmhurst. I have a wonderful new life and I owe it all to them!

It's been a good week for me! I'm 3 weeks post-op and I've lost almost 30 pounds! I'm still on soft foods, which is really hard cuz it's barbeque season and I'm dying for a Chicago-style hotdog! For the first time since high-school, I walked 1 mile yesterday. I know it's not much, but with a herniated disk in your lower spine, it's pretty damn good! And guess what? I have a DATE on Friday! I'm so excited! He's much younger than me, but he's very sweet and he's in recovery, so it's promising. Oh, and - did I mention? He's smoking hot! LOL

I threw up for the first time this weekend, not pleasant, but not as bad as I had expected. My mom made dinner Saturday night - chicken, potatoes with onions & cheese and cauliflower. She blended the potatoes for me, and I took a small bite of cauliflower and and even smaller bite of chicken. Within 15 minutes, I was puking. But I have to say, it didn't hurt at all, and I felt SO MUCH BETTER afterward! I'm glad I made it three weeks before I threw up or I would have been in so much pain!

I'm healing up nicely. My laproscopic scars are all healed up and where my drain was is almost healed, too. I look like freekin' Frankenstein, though. It's okay. Scars are cool. They tell a good story. And once my tummy is nice and flat, I can get tattoos to cover them.

I want to thank everyone for all their support during this challenging time in my life! We don't even know each other and you've all been so nice. So, THANK YOU!!!

SUCKED!!!! Don't get me wrong - I had a great time, I went to a picnic, but all the food I couldn't eat! BOO HOO! I would have killed for a hot dog. It's a long road, post-op. Waiting till your stomach can handle real foods... And you don't realize what a part food plays in life until you've had the surgery! Celebrations, Sunday dinners, family time, friend time - you name the occassion and there's food involved! I finally broke down and got myself an insulated lunch box and and ice-pack, so I can carry my yogurts and cottage cheese around with me. Last week I wasn't taking very good care of myself, not eating for hours on end, and this week I refuse to do the same thing. This week, I'm going to have my food with me so that I can eat every 2 hours like I'm supposed to! I got up and walked a mile yesterday - felt good, too! My back didn't start hurting until about 3/4 of the way through, which for me, is a miracle! I used to be able to make it about a 1/10th of a mile before my back started hurting. Now, 20 pounds lighter, it's made all the difference. It's supposed to rain today, but luckily, I have a treadmill at my disposal.

Now, all I want is a man. I've been single for almost 4 years... my last relationship being an abusive one. I think I'm ready to get back into the dating pool. I've been talking to this guy, Tim, on PlentyOfFIsh.com (great site for meeting quality people - and it's FREE!). It seems we have a lot in common, and he's REALLY cute too! Just a little young for my tastes, but if he can keep up with me, it's all good. I hope something comes of it. I'm ready to fall in love again. I'm ready to have someone in my life. I'd really like to meet someone before I lose all the weight. I want to meet someone who will love me for me and not for just what I look like, you know?

I went and got my drain out yesterday. At the Doc's office, they weighed me. I'm 16 pounds down from my start weight. In TEN DAYS!!!! How exciting! I have another appointment in two weeks, I wonder how much I'll lose by then!

My Dad bought me an MP3 player as a congratulatory gift, and I'm setting it up today. I'm listening to a lot of music I haven't listened to in a while. I'm awfully sentimental, crying at every other love song (and I'm not a big fan of the love song). But I haven't been taking my anti-depressents for the last week, so I don't know if I'm being sentimental or if I'm just off my meds. All I know is this good cry has felt kinda good. I guess I just miss old friends who are no longer in my life the way they used to be... I dunno. Luckily, I"m on my Tenacious D CD right now, so it's all smiles and happiness!

I'm such a sentimental fool!

I got out of the hospital yesterday afternoon. I feel like shit. I have a drainage bag hanging out of the left side of my torso. I have to give myself a lovenox shot every day. My pain drugs wear off every 2 1/2 hours, and I can only take them every 5 hours. I'm tired and I want a cheeseburger so badly!!!!!

But is it worth it? You bet your sweet ass it is! I've already lost 4.5 pounds. I'm up and walking the halls of my building three times a day. I know this weight is going to fall right off of me and I can't wait!

If anyone has any questions about the procedure or about recovery, please don't hesitate to email me.

It's SO worth it!

It's here! It's finally here! My surgery date is finally here!

I'm packing up my bags for the hospital. Getting ready to spend a few days there. I can't wait. I hope and pray that nothing goes wrong in the interim, so say a little prayer for me as well.

I'll write as soon as I'm back home and tell you all all about it.

Wish me luck!!!!

I'm on the home stretch. I've got 12 days till my surgery and I'm on a shake diet. I'm doing horribly at it. The last three days I didn't eat my shakes.... I don't understand these things.... They say I'm supposed to live on a shake diet so I can lose some weight before my surgery. But if I could lose weight I wouldn't need the damn surgery in the first place! I'm back on them today. No more messing around. I have to take this seriously, I can't flubb it up. These shakes are awful though. They're like chalk and fruit flavoring. I'm constantly hungry. All I notice on TV are restaraunt and food ads. It seems as though everyone around me is constantly eating. It's torture!!! Today is my sister's birthday and I can't even have a piece of cake at her party. This weekend will be harder, as I'm going on a retreat and the best thing about the place is the food! Oh woe is me!!!

I've got 22 days until my surgery. Tomorrow I pick up my meal replacement shakes and I call the hospital to schedule my pre-surgery testing.

I'm so excited! I cannot wait to change my life forever. I'm sort of binging on good foods that I want to have now that I know I won't be able to have later - white castle hamburgers, caramel frappucino's, chinese food. Soon, I won't be able to have any of these things. So, I'm getting them in before the surgery. Starting next week, I go on the meal replacement shakes, so I won't even be able to have them then. I say goodbye to you, food. I'll now eat for necessity, not for pleasure.

I'm becoming more aware of what's good for me to eat. I've got a nurse friend and a nutritionist friend. They're both going to help me with my meal plans post-op.

I hope that God will be with me on the operating table. I don't want anything to go wrong. Keep me in your prayers, please!!!

So, I'm halfway to getting my surgery date. I've seen the pulmonologist (but still need a sleep study), I've gotten an ultra-sound, seen the psych doctor, done everything except quit smoking (any suggestions?). And I pray to God every night that I'll get this surgery done. I've been large my whole life. My first weight loss attempt was at age 10, when my mom took me to a hypnotist to try to "suggest" me thin. Didn't work too well. Oh, I lost a little weight, but it just came back. You all know the stories, right? 

If there's anything you think I should know about before getting the roux-en-Y, I'd love to hear about it.