AriesDiva07

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

                                                                                 

There are some things that I just allow to set me back.  But the last few days have really showed me something about a lot of ppl. 

I have now realized that this really is a journey that I must make on my own, in a way.  I have allowed the fact that my car is acting crazy (no brakes) keep me from the gym.  I was scared to sign another lease because of fear of possibly losing my job.  But I can't fear everything all the time.  So, on that note, I'll be going to the car dealership to get another lease on a car tomorrow.  I let things hold me back, and it's going to stop!!! 

I have 3 days before my pre-admissions test on the 12th and it's my intention to lose another few lbs before that day!!

That's right, clap for me!!!  Better yet, I will clap for myself!  Because I plan on losing to get down to the size that I want to be!!!  Look out world, it's the NEW me!!!  And I need to hold no one's hand.

WHAT CAN I SAY???
THEY CALLED ME THE OTHER DAY AND SCHEDULED MY PRETEST AND SURGERY!!!  I WAS AT WORK AND I JUST STARTED SCREAMING AFTER I GOT OFF THE PHONE.

I'M WORRIED THOUGH.  I HAVE TO DRIVE THERE AND I'VE NEVER DRIVEN THE EXPRESSWAY IN THE SNOW. I'M SCARED, BUT HEY, I'LL DRIVE THROUGH HELL AND BACK TO GET THERE!!!  ACTUALLY, I'VE BEEN THROUGH HELL, AND I'M ON THE WAY TO RALLYING BACK WITH THIS SURGERY.

HOPEFULLY, BY NEXT CHRISTMAS, I'LL BE ABLE TO TAKE SOME SEXY PICS LIKE THIS ONE THAT MY MYSPACE FRIEND ADDED TO HER SITE.



I'M JUST BEYOND HAPPY RIGHT NOW.  THANKS EVERYONE WHO'S OFFERED KIND WORDS, WISDOM, AND EXCELLENT ADVICE.  THANK YOU

I'VE BEEN SICK THE LAST FEW DAYS WITH AN ILLNESS I PREFER NOT TO DISCUSS.  I KNOW IT WILL GO AWAY WHEN I GET THE SURGERY AND START LOSING WEIGHT, BUT IT DRIVES ME CRAZY BECAUSE IT'S JUST NOT FAIR.  ANYWAY, THIS "ILLNESS" HAS SLOWED ME UP A BIT, AS FAR AS GOING TO THE GYM.  I'VE SORTA PUT DOWN MY WORKOUT PARTNER AND HAVEN'T REALLY TOLD HER WHAT WAS GOING ON.  (SORRY GIRLIE)  I HOPE SHE'LL UNDERSTAND WHEN SHE READS THIS (IF SHE READS THIS). 

ON TOP OF THAT, I JUST KINDA GOT SET BACK AND DISCOURAGED BY THEM RESCHEDULING MY SURGERY.  I DUNNO WHAT I WANNA DO.  PART OF ME WANTS TO GO AHEAD AND HAVE IT DONE LOCALLY AND THE OTHER HALF WANTS TO STICK WITH BARIX CLINIC. 

MY SUPPORT SYSTEM HAS COMPLETELY FALLEN APART BC NOW IT'S ALL ABT "WELL, AFTER YOU HAVE THIS SURGERY, YOU'RE GONNA LEAVE ME".  I'M NOT UP FOR THAT TYPE OF NEGATIVITY RIGHT NOW. 

THEN ON TOP OF THAT, MY CAR HAS BEEN ACTING CRAZY.  I HAVE NO BRAKES AND DRIVING AROUND TOWN BC I HAVE NO ONE ELSE TO DEPEND ON.  I'M TIRED.  AND HONESTLY, I'VE BEEN SLIPPING.  I'VE BEEN LETTING OTHERS CONTROL MY MOTIVATION AND I HAVE TO GAIN CONTROL AGAIN.  I KEEP PUTTING IT OFF AND PUTTING IT OFF BUT IT ENDS TONIGHT.   LORD, JUST GIMME STRENGTH....EVERYONE, SAY A PRAYER.

Well, it's been a major setback!!!
I was supposed to be getting scheduled for the surgery this week. Instead, when the surgeon's office called me, they called to tell me that my insurance didn't cover their facility and that I would have to pay out of pocket.  This was Friday. I just felt like i'd always be the big girl and there was no way out. It really brought me to an all-time low.

I was so discouraged the weekend that I decided to REALLY stay focused and I went on Sunday and joined Lifestyles for Ladies on the 2-month promo for 69.00.  I went to actually work out on Monday and guess what???? The lady put me on a regimen of working out on the treadmill for 20 mins and the stationary bike for 10 mins.!!!  And the amazing thing was, after that workout, I wasn't even sore.  I even woke up yesterday and I wanted more!!!

So I got off work, and invited my Barix buddy, Harmonie, and we went and worked out for an hour!!!

It was great!!! And still, no soreness!!!!

The last couple of days have been unbelievable!!!  I got a call from Barix the other day, saying they would be calling this week to schedule my surgery date!!!  I am utterly EXCITED about that.

Then, I stepped on a scale, and I think it was broke or something, because exactly one month ago (yesterday), I have lost 20 lbs since my orientation!!!

Today, I went grocery shopping.  I have never felt so confused about shopping for food in my LIFE!  I didn't know what was good for me and what wasn't.  I just kinda stood in aisles for 5-10 mins just looking for the right ketchup, or the right dressings, the right fruit.  It was so mind-wracking that I was honestly shaking.  I think I did really well though, in my selections.  I also got a new blender from Meijers.  It's called Blend n'Go.  It's a blender that allows you to blend it in a container and take the container with you.  It looks just like a water bottle!!!  It's the best investment I've ever made. 

Also today, I really committed myself by going to Lifestyles for Ladies and signing up for the 2-mo. holiday promo they're having.  I told her that I would be in on Tuesday for the initial weigh-in and all that.  I am scared, nervous, the whole nine.

I think that I'm off to a GREAT start before the surgery!!!

Profile Graphics - SoulCityGraphics.com

I am really having a difficult time following a diet but the other day made it all worthwhile!  Dr. Pop advised everyone in our orientation that it be best for everyone to attempt to lose 10-15 lbs prior to the surgery.

When I saw the list of everything I was going to have to give up, the only thing I wanted to do was go binge on everything I would have to give up.  Instead, I got groceries geared toward what I need to get used to eating and it wasn't half bad. 

What really made me proud of myself the other day was this:  I am a huge french fry fan!  I had just gotten off of work and knew I didn't feel like cooking.  I called my s.o. to see if she wanted something to eat while I was out.  I figured I could go to Wendy's and get a grilled chicken sandwich with a baked potato.  Well, I get in line and I was just beyond frustrated bc for one reason or another, they had nothing healthy available that I was trying to order.  I got frustrated and went over to Arby's and ordered.  But this meant I got no baked potato.  Cole, that's her name, ordered french fries with her roast beef sandwich. 

I drove home with the order sitting only inches away from me.  I just kept telling myself, "you can just eat a couple, she'll never know."  That was the longest ride home EVER.  But I made it, WITH EVERY FRY IN TACT!  lol

I see now, fighting temptation is a motha'....