Aryiana

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Went to the NY Ren Faire site as we always do the week  before faire starts and the first person I run into, a guy I have known for over 10 years takes one look at me and says I look great! That he noticed I lost weight in my face and my body.  I am speechless as I don't see it and am so pre-occupied by what I am NOT losing that I don't see what I am.

We came home and I tried on my bodices to see what I will wear next week. I have 4 in increasingly larger sizes and I am now between #3-#2 - meaning that I have one way too big and my smallest will probably fit by the end of the season.  I am happy and this just made me even more so.

Chicken didn't stay down last night.... not sure why and am hoping it is just a fluke since I do love poultry.  Well new day new experiences.....

On Wednesday I had an endoscopy (sort of a colonoscopy but from the mouth down instead of the other way around).  They found lots of inflamation around one of the suture lines and in general and are figuring this is why I can't keep food down.

Meanwhile they put me on carafate which is a liquid that tastes like pink flavored chalk.  Don't ask me what "pink" tastes like, I can only tell you that is how it tastes.... Pink.  This stuff is supposed to coat the inflamed parts (it is used for ulcers) so that I can keep food down.  So far I haven't tried antyhing that I know I have had problems with in the past (I dunno I have this thing about not liking to throw up or tempt it on purpose, ya know??).

The worst part about it all is that I am in a (now) almost 3 week stall.  I have lost about #23 and that is where I have been the past 2.5 weeks.  I did better at first with my RNY, however, it has been mentioned that when I start eating my body should respond and give up the weight.  Right now I am probably in starvation mode and it is just holding on to everything.

The above was written on Thursday.  As of today, Saturday, I am doing quite well.  Figured I might as well test the theory that it was the inflamation causing all the havoc and making me throw up and yesterday food wise I did very well!  I was able to keep down 2 soft boiled eggs (about 30 mins apart - I was still hungry after the first one), lentil soup, chicken salad and even had salmon and salad for dinner!!!!  Carb smart ice cream for dessert too!

Now the scale has to catch up and I may settle in and enjoy the ride.  As for now I'm waiting for it to start - like on a roller coaster when there are technical difficulties and you are strapped in just sitting there waiting... that's how I feel.

So it's been 5 weeks.  I am underwhelmed.  My weight loss is about as good -- if not a bit less than when I had my RNY - #23 at last weigh in.  I am having a problem with keeping solids down -- about 75% of the time I throw up.  Beef, chicken... anything other than cheese it seems.  I can't tolerate scrambled eggs even!!  To this end, on Wednesday I am going to have an endoscopy.  I am on Reglan and I'm taking it with ativan to chill my entire system.  This is in addition to Prilosec.  Drink wise iced coffee with cream seems to sit the best.

I'm a bit disgusted with the whole thing and altho I don't wonder "why" I did it, or have buyers remorse, I am frustrated.

Food.  I think I am having esophageal spasms.  Almost everytime I eat or drink anything after a few sips/bites I get a pain in my upper chest.  I use an analogy of a funnel -- like things need to filter down slowly through -- and after I either burp or feel a little gurgly, it goes down and all is well again.  This happened with the tuna -- to the point where I am not going to try it again for a bit, with the chopped liver my mom made for me right before surgery (I froze it all and took out some on Tuesday) and the cheese I had today.

That all being said, I am eating cheese (string, BabyBels, cheddar), and chopped liver in addition to the full liquid stuff that I am sick and tired of.  My taste is a bit off and the decaf iced tea that i drank by the gallon I am currently not drinking -- it doesn't taste "right".

I am half way thru my 80 plus hour work week after this shift tonight and am no worse for wear.  I think I may be a bit more tired (ya think??  You just had major open abdominal surgery a week and a half ago duh.....), but it isn't to where I am not able to keep my eyes open or that I think I am not able to provide the best care to my patients.

I got tired of my JP drain this afternoon -- it hadn't been putting out for almost 48 hours and it was getting very irritated, so I did what any questionably compliant person would do -- I pulled it.  I figure if Dr. G was there this week I would get it pulled anyway.  I didn't know that I could wait another week with it - it was just getting too annoying.  The worst he can do is yell at me I think but it is done. (Disclaimer - I don't know WHO reads this, but DO NOT DO THIS YOURSELF - I CAN BE AN IDIOT AT TIMES AND YOUR DOCTOR KNOWS BEST).

That's about it from here for now.  Still waiting for my first goal -- to be able to get my engagement ring back on my finger -- where it belongs :sigh:.

I have been going absolutely nuts wanting food.... well actually I just want tuna and salmon (Costco's marinated salmon and tuna with mayo).  I called Dr. G's office to schedule an appointment and decided to wait until next week when he is back to go in and have my JP drain pulled.  When I was on the phone with June I told her how nutz I was going and how totally done with full liquids I am.  Yes, I know I am only a week out, but DAMMIT I WANT REAL FOOD.  I am tired of pudding and yogurt and soup.

Well tonight/this morning (I'm working a night shift so what do you call 2:30AM??) I had tuna with mayo.  It was way more mayo than I generally like but I promised I would make it very moist so it would be a puree consistency.  I brought 4 oz with  me, maybe have eaten about 1.5 - 2 and it's not going down so well   Very reminscent of with the RNY when you eat something that doesn't agree with the pouch - yes, I have juicy mouth and I am waiting to see if all goes as it usually does and this gets thrown up ...

CRAP!!  The taste was so what I wanted.... but this is not cool at all.

3AM - ok... walked a little (back and forth to the bathroom pondering puking) and as seems to happen lots with this DS thing, I ended up burping a few times - however, unlike with the RNY everything didn't just decide to come tossing back up.  I am not looking forward to throwing up with the DS -- gotta remember gastric juices are now back involved so it isn't same in/same out anymore.

UGH... so much for THIS update.

In other things I was almost not allowed to return to the night job because I don't have a doctor's note.  They asked what kind of surgery I had -- I just answered that it was a revision of a previous one (I do remember telling them it was "minor surgery").  Wonder if Greenbaum would have a problem with me returning so soon?  I am perfectly fine for this.....and if anything happens mom is in the other room and I will wake her if I need help.

Oh - my midline incision was glued (apparently) and then a big steristrip thing was on it the length of the incision.  Today part of it pulled away way at the top.  Since I can't leave well enough alone, and this part that was exposed was intact and closed, I experimented with the rest and ended up talking the whole thing off.  Incision is pretty clean -- was right along the previous scar.  The JP drain put out about 120CC all day on Saturday (i empty every 12 hrs).  Today I had a grand total of about 15!!  I may have to track Dr. G down at the beginning of next week and pull this thing myself if it gets too annoying.

Speaking of annoying, grand total for the first week is #10.  Not stellar and with my RNY lost #13 the first week.  Will just have to remain patient and see what is going to happen here.

Weird feelings..... Maddie posed the question of how things feel different - RNY vs DS... well this tuna thing....felt stuck like with the RNY, burped a few times and then I picture a funnel -- things get a bit collected at the top but funnel thru everntually and all is good.  Right now, all is good -- no more stuck/gonna throw up feeling.

Hanging on for the ride!!!

Went to the grocery store with DH and the baby and I had to use a motorized chair/cart.  Yea, I know I have to give myself a time to heal but I feel like I am the fail since I had to give in and not walk.

Post Date: 6/19/09 7:05 pm
The only issue I have had is the feeding tube (J-tube) that Dr. Greenbaum places as a safety measure in case fluids/eating become a problem or if you have a leak, etc.

I am allergic to latex.  Found that out in nursing school 17 years ago.... and told him at the beginning this was the case.  He told me flat out that if I was "that allergic" he could not do the surgery.  My desire for my DS outweighed my few brain cells that had been working, and bottom line was that the J-tube was one of those red-rubber tubes.

From the time I was "awake" on Monday, I knew this tube was problematic.  It burned everytime it moved and inside it just didn't feel "right" (I have a JP tube for drainage on the right and have had previous surgeries so I had a clue).  I complained up until my discharge last night but was only really given lip service and neosporin to put on the skin topically.

When I woke up this morning I had severe pain from my hipbone all the way to my left shoulder and  couldn't breathe well (couldn't take a deep breath) without pain, or move for that matter.  The pain started from where the tube entered my intestine (I could feel where the liquid would enter when I flushed it) and radiated out from there.  I called Dr. G and he said we had 3 options.  1) leave it 2) come to the office and he would remove it or 3) I could cut the suture myself and pull the tube.

I chose to pull the tube myself and all I can say is that as soon as it was out of my body I felt 1000% better.... I still have some lingering pain and I think that I am still having an allergic reaction internally.

I'm a bit peeved that it had to come to this before he would let me pull it (or that he refused to do it yesterday), altho I do understand WHY he has it in in the first place.

Other than that, no problem with liquids or protein and all is good from here!!!

Post Date: 6/18/09 9:52 am
Those of you that I talk to on a daily or so basis knew that my immediate goals with my switch were 1) posting day of surgery and 2) getting out of the hospital after my open revision on Wednesday.

Well I did make the post on day of surgery however, due to the medicine issues on Tuesday (not having pain and nausea in control) there was no way I was out of here yesterday.  That being said.... Dr. Greenbaum came in this morning, and I talked my way into letting him ok me for a shower with my central line.

Dr. G NEVER gives an ok for a shower with a central line.... however, he ok'd me for it and I took one (after being all wrapped with gauze and plastic around my neck - yes, we got pix).

Dr. G just rounded again and asked if I wanted to go home today.  He said I would have the record for going home early for a revision - since he knew my original goal - and of course I called DH and am scheduled to go home this evening now.

I'm allowed full liquids until I see him in two weeks (would be a week but he is going to the Bariatric conference next week).

So there you have it.... once I get home I will have to keep in mind that I am not allowed to do anything for a few more days and actually NOT do anything - maybe DH will stay home with me tomorrow... that would be nice for a change

Post Date: 6/17/09 3:48 pm

Well they finally moved me down from CCU to the bariatric floor/wing (?).  Yesterday was not stellar.  I knew I was not doing well with Morphine and was having nausea, so they switched me then to Dilaudid.  I thought that was doing the trick but yesterday, all day was feeling bad... I mean real bad.... and made the comment that I just wanted to get in bed and die (note to self: don't make those kind of comments in the CCU when you aren't serious about the dying part).  Again, from previous surgeries I KNEW something was not under control as well as it could be, so this morning when Dr. Greenbaum came in we switched again to Tordol.

Within an hour I bounced back and have been my normal self.  I am now complaining about wanting a shower (no deal until he pulls the central line), he allowed me ice chips and water (ooooohhhhh...) but I specifically asked about tea and he said ok.... so since then I have gone thru at least 12 oz of tea and as soon as I finish posting and get up so my poor nurse can say I voided and walked this shift, will have more.  Good thing they didn't limit me on the tea since I always have been a big drinker and altho it feels a bit strange (stomach is no longer gurgling off to the left as with the RNY), I still want to drink!

I feel fine and if this was yesterday I would seriously be clammering to go home today. 

I am having a slight Blood Pressure issue which could be from the pain that was not in control before.  Not sure what it is now since I am off the regular big monitor and on telemetry.  I did have an intermittant problem with blood pressure pre-op, but not like this.  Yesterday laying in bed doing nothing it actually hit 200/106!!

So that's it from here.  Just spent the past few hours catching up on posts here and email in 2 or my 3 main accounts.  Have to find my cell phone charger (geez... I know I had it ready to come here just hope it made it into my stuff).

Oh, and my latex allergy now has been "upgraded" on my chart to include a  "tape allergy"... .have a nice, angry looking skin tear on my neck from the dressing change on the central line.  Oh fun :).

Looking forward to watching "So You Think You Can Dance" tonight-- it's my secret guilty pleasure