5D Wednesday (Groundhog day again)

Jun 16, 2010

While normally, this would be Day 3 of the 5DPT, I am extending days 1 & 2 two days each. So this is the 1st day of day 2 (make sense?).

Why am I doing this to myself?!?!!? 
Well - I was just thinking, you know, i feel pretty good right now, & I think it really takes (me) a couple of days for the idea & process to sink in. If i were moving on to day 3 of the program - i dont feel i would get as much out of it. I think I am just now starting to reconnect w/ my pouch. Im just now starting to recognize that "full" feeling. So I'll continue as is.
Im tracking my intake & note that Im still getting my 1500+ calories - so im cool there.
Additionally, I also notice that im getting in WAY MORE liquids than noraml AND im finally starting to see that larger % of protein over carbs.
So im learning & getting a handle on the hunger & thats a good thing.

As i said, im feeling pretty good today - my spirits are high. Im looking forward to getting back to my old weight.
I loaded a bunch of before & after pics to my profile last night w/ comments of how i was feeling at that time. It took me a while to realize that although it was intimidating, i felt the best about MYSELF, physically & emotionally, when I was around 165/170. There's a pic of me in a strapless size 10 dress. I look back see myself then & I have to say - i am smokin hotty!! lol
Some of my friends were jelly & my fam freaked b/c they've never seen me like that, so that not so positive input really took a toll mentally. Even though i felt great great physically & was really trying to find my NEW self & feel good abou tme emotionally. Many times I have said that  I was not really comfortable in my own skin @ 164.  That statement is partially true - i was not comfortable, nor were my friends & fam w/ my at that weight. It was a huge transition (no pun intended lol). So I believe that not so positive input was largely to blame.

But i cant live for them - i need to live for me.
That said, Ive come to the conclusion that I really liked being that skinny chick. She wasnt all that bad...
Getting to know her hard. Seeing her in the mirror is definitely an adjustment & will be something that I will have to learn to get use to - but I want that back. I want to be feel good about myself again. I want to be happIER.
I want to be back in the 165/170 range.
I look forward to that :)

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