cece1971

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i had almost a week back to work when I got the flu.  I ended up inn  the hospital on friday.  I had to get 2 bags of fluids and a chest xray. The xray was clear,  I have bjust been having a hard time getting in all of the protein.  The shakes are turning my stomach.  So is the Carnation Instant breakfast.....ugh...i just want to get in all of my protein in the 3 meals a day i am eating. 

Well, I went back to work yesterday and it felt really great. I was getting so bored with being home.  I am feeling pretty good.  Still just a bit of sorenes at the incision sites, but so far, I am tolerating things really well.  I have not elt gung ho about increasing my activity....but I now once I can go full blown, I will get into it.  I have lost 16 pounds since surgery....I am happy about that!!!  I still feel tho that this surgery is not going to work for me.  I think that is just self defeting thoughts.  If I do what they tell me to do....all will be well with the me and  will see results on a gradual basis.  I must learn to be patient with this process!

Well, here I sit.....i have managed to get in 45 ounces of fluids today which is far better than 20 I got yesterday.  Seems like I am constantly drinking.  I have found the easiet way to get my fluids in is to use sugar free popsicles.... 
I am really looking forward to full liquids though.....just need a bit more substance....   

The other thing that has helped me feel a bit better today was  to really walk as much as possible...not long walks...but just short...around the house walks...Finally got this gas moving out of me.   

Well, here i am on day five of the protein shakes.  I thought I would be absolutley miserable, but so far I am holding my own.  I have found my favorite flavor and now I am going to run with it.  It also helps that I am allowed 2 cups of veggies everyday along with it.  So far I have lost 10 pounds.  I found a "cheescake" flavored extract and along with a few drops of orange extract, my vanilla Bariatric Advantage shakes are pretty darn good.  I can do this....

I saw the bariatric nurse today to get the instructions for the Pre-Op diet.  Protein shakes,....here I come.  December 31st is the official end of the old way of doing things.  I start the 10 day protein shake diet on January 1st.  I kinda like that everything for me starts on January 1st....I love new beginnings

Well, I signed the release forms...it is officially....official!  I can almost not believe how fast the time is going.  I have less that a month to go.  I saw on someone else's blog how their surgery date is their birthday. I like the way that sounds.  I have a mixture of excitement and sadness going on.  I have the next four weeks to say goodbye to the old me...I think I am sort of going through a bit of a grieving process about that.  I struggle to put it into words. 

Well, after 6 months of classes......I have been approved for my surgery.  With that approval comes some nervousness.  The idea of me not being 340 pounds....frankly is very scary stuff.  Will I like me thinner?  Will my husband like me thinner?  Will I be able to follow the regimen that i will have to do???  Doing the consults, I found out that there was more wrong with me that I thought...will those conditions get better?  How am I going to afford the vitamins? How am I going to afford the clothing???  All of these things are running through my head......but I know that I need to do this....my life truly depends on this being a success.