Six weeks grateful post

Aug 13, 2009

I have not posted for a while.  I was afraid I did not have anything positive to say and wanted to avoid a litany of complaints and problems.  Now at 6 weeks I can look back over the course of things with a little better perspective.  This morning I was teaching the 23rd Psalm (and yes I've been on this for quite a while).  One of the things that caught my attention was the fact that you can take everything from me, including my health,  I still have a Shepherd.  Nothing can change that.  Learning to be grateful for every gift is an art that I need to further develop.  One of the examples Max Lucado used was the fellow who had lost everything, and when getting ready to eat his bread and water, he prayed, "and I have this and a Shepherd too!"  He was grateful.  And so this morning, I prayed over my Premier Protein shake, "and I have this and a Shepherd too."  It made a huge difference.  The protein has been difficult for me, and without an attitude of gratefulness would have continued to be a thorn.

Looking back at the first weeks following surgery I see how unprepared I was for feeling ill all the time and not able to conform to my "dream" of how it was going to be.  I didn't lose the big pounds I see posted and was disappointed, not grateful, for the 14 pounds I did lose.  I'm still on full liquids at 6 weeks out, with just a few purees added in.  I was complaining yesterday how tired I am of such limited fare.  Again, not grateful. 

I have a lot to do going forward, another surgery in a couple of weeks.  A lot of testing before hand with my cardiologist due to some heart issues with the first surgery.  I also have to have some crazy test with the gastroenterologist that invovles putting a tube down your nose and then swallowing liquids.  Sounds horrific,  but I'm going to try to be grateful that I have these tests and treatments available to me.  An attitude of being grateful will certainly filter how I think about all these things.

So I thank you Lord for the surgery that will repair my hernia and make getting adequate nutrition easier.  And, I thank you for the tests and concerned physicians who are treating me.  I thank you I can access medical care when so many cannot.   I thank you that the nausea is so much less and my feeling of well being is so much more.  I thank you for the small victories like enough energy to walk with DH and dogs or go to the gym.  I thank you that daily you are my Shepherd and concerned with even the hair on my head.  (I may have trouble thanking You if it all falls out --- LOL).

I thank you Lord for my OH family who has supported, encouraged and responded to my difficult journey.  You know how close we are as a community,  I ask you bless them richly and that You walk on each journey with them.

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