Deborah C.

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

I am addicted to food. Let me rephrase that I am addicted to sugary fatty foods.

I am so afraid of messing up. I wish that this surgery could cure food addiction. I seem to be eating everything that is bad for me. Mostly when I am at home. I know it is boredom and what do I do? I head to the fridge and/or the cabinets trying to find something to eat. Why do I even have the bad stuff in the house? That is a good question. I guess that will be the question I ask myself when I go to the grocery store tonight.

What to do about boredom. Well I could make all kinds of promises but I know that I won't keep those promises. All I want to do when I am at home is sit and watch TV. I don't want to get up and work out or clean the house or get some kind of hobby. I just want my mind to shut off.

Even though the weight is coming off slowly and the inches are coming off, I know in the back of my mind that if I continue to eat the way that I do that I will gain the weight back. That is unacceptable to me. But how do I get my brain to work with me and not against me? Oh this is so hard!!!!

I am 3 months post op!

Weight

July 29th - 248.8
Sept 7th - 229
Oct 7th - 212.8
Nov 7th - 204.8
Dec 7th - 198.4

So that is a total loss of 50.4lbs since July and 30.6lbs since surgery.

Well I guess we can start off by saying that Thanksgiving went better than I expected it to go. At first I didn't know if I could or wanted to be around anyone since Momma passed away. But I did. And it was wonderful to be around so much of my family. My little sister Angel, hosted her first Thanksgiving dinner at her house. I had small bites of just about everything there. Then my older sister Tonia, had Thanksgiving at her house, and I had small bites of just about everything there. It went very well.

My eating is still the same as last month. Still learning how fast, how much and what I can eat. When I eat sweets, like ice cream, I get a major sugar rush and feel sick to my stomach. That didn't happen before. So guess what, that has curbed my desire for sweets.

I have started walking at the YMCA 1 to 2 times a week. I know that is not much but at least it is something. I take the stairs at work and I park further away from the building.

All of my clothes are so loose now. However, I'm not quite ready for the next size down in pants. I need a little more off from around my belly in order to go down a size.

I feel so much better now. I can walk up the stairs without feeling like I'm going to have a heart attack. I cross my legs all the time now. I can sit indian style. My sons can pick me up like a rag doll. And the best thing I am under 200lbs for the first time in 14 years.

Love my sleeve!

Bo had her baby shower today. It was great seeing her so happy. She received a lot of stuff from her loving family. She had it at Ryan's steakhouse, it is a buffet style restaurant. I did great! We were there for 2 hours and I had 1 small plate of food and a couple bites of a cupcake. I was so busy enjoying myself with my family I didn't even think about eating.

I love my family!

I am 2 months post op!

 Weight

July 29th - 248.8
Sept 7th - 229
Oct 7th - 212.8
Nov 7th - 204.8

Inches
Neck -2
Chest -5
Waist -6
Hips -6
Arms 0
Legs -4

I am still learning what I can and cannot eat. Somethings put the weight back on and some do not. I haven't been following the doctor's plan exactly. However, I do have these 4oz cups that I use to measure out my food for work. I can eat just about anything, doesn't mean I should, just means I can. I still struggle to get in all of my water. I mix things up by drinking water or powerade zero. I can drink more at work but once I get home it seems to slow down. I haven't been exercising at all. My excuse, I am too mentally tired to do it after work and on the weekends I just want to relax. I know that I need to exercise to lose more weight, to keep my body fit, but my laziness keeps me from doing it. The boys try to get me to go with them and I refuse everytime. I am happy with the weightloss and with the restriction the sleeve gives me. I would never be able to do this on my own. Things will only get better from here.

Well as of 10/07/10 I have been sleeved for 1 month. I am down 16.2lbs since surgery and a total of 36lbs since I started tracking my weight on July 29th. I have went down 2 pant sizes, I drink about 4oz at anytime and I am full, I have to remind myself to eat, my youngest son Aaron can now pick me up over his shoulder with no problem at all (I have a picture of this), I look in the mirror and I am beginning to like myself again.

I am still on full liquids for the rest of this week, next week I start on pureed food for 2 weeks and then on to regular foods. I am so sick of yogurt, jello, pudding, crystal lite flavorings, popsicles and soup. I am really ready for some real food. I have not had much energy because of being on liquids so I haven't been working out, just walking a little bit. I do take my vitamins everyday. I however do not get in all of my water or protein, I am full most of the time and have to remind myself to eat. The head hunger has went away some since I have come back to work. I stay so busy I don't think about eating. It's worse at home when the family is eating or when I smell food but because I don't feel the hunger all I really want is a small taste, which I do get most of the time, and then I'm done.

09/28/10 - Weighed in at 215.2lbs, down 5lbs from last week
Still on a full liquid diet, which consist of protein shakes, broth, carbmaster yogurt, SF Jello, SF Pudding and lots of water. Can't wait for some food.

1st week back to work wasn't so bad. I was able to pack my food and take my 20oz bottle to keep water in. I am keeping a food journal and doing my best to write in it everytime I eat. Of course it is easier during the week when I have the journal out on my desk at work. But at home the journal is in my purse and I tend to forget about it. I did receive so many compliments at work about my weightloss. That made me feel very good that others are seeing my weightloss.  I also had to replace 2 pairs of my work pants because they were falling off of me. I went to Fashion Bug today (10/02/10) to get a couple of new pairs of pants, and OMG I got to buy a size 18!! That is 2 sizes down!! This is a very happy day for me!

This is too funny!!! Aaron can now pick me up over his shoulder with no problem at all.

09/21/10 - 09/27/10
Weighing in at 220lbs.  Down 2lbs from last week.
The only things that really went on this week is my sister had her son on 09/22/10, he weighed 9lbs. I went to see him the next day as that is also the day I had my 2 week appointment with the surgeon. Seeing my sister, her daughter and son was the best part of my week.


I went to the Y with Aaron on Saturday and tried to lift weights but even the lightest weights were too heavy and I was getting so lightheaded so I just walked the track while Aaron worked out. I went back to work on Monday the 27th. It is actually really good to be back at work. I fix my lunch box with all my food measured out and when I eat it I make sure to write it down in my journal. This helps me keep track with my food and water.

 OMG I almost forgot!! I found a couple pairs of blue jeans in the attic, they are a size 20 and they fit with room. Even though I went from a 22 to a 20 it's all good for me. Also, when getting ready for my first day back to work I put on a pair of work pants and they were WAY to big for me! Now that's what I'm talking about!!!

09/14/10 - So today I have been sleeved for a week. I weighed in at 222.8 lbs. That's 7 lbs since surgery. How cool is that! Ok, now on to what I did today. Me and Ben went out today. We ate at TGI Fridays and I had mashed potatoes and only ate a few, took the rest home. Then we went to Best Buy to get the second season of Sons of Anarchy. Love me some Jacks!! While we were there we saw Angel, Eva, Sabrina and baby. Boy Angel looks like she could bust any second. The baby will be here soon. The rest of the night I have had a protein shake, went on a walk with Ben, the rest of my mashed potatoes and now having a protein water. I can certainly feel the fullness.

09/15/10 - So I have had a protein shake, chicken broth, popsicle's and protein water.  I went on a walk with Aaron and noticed that my pants kept falling down. I guess that's a step in the right direction. Oh yea, I got more work done on my sleeve. It is now connected (top and bottom).  It's been a good day.



09/16/10 - 09/18/10
I have been really blah the last few days so I haven't really felt like posting. Not really getting in all of my water or walking. I got on the scales today and haven't lost any weight. I'm thinking that is because I haven't been up walking around. Today I went to Veteran's Memorial Park with Aaron for the Old Timers Parade. He sang with his school choir a few times. It was nice outside today so that was good. By the time he was done, well let's just say we were done and ready to go. I did wish I could eat everything that was there. It all smelt so good. I did have some barbecue though. It settled in my new tummy well. So right now, hanging on the couch watching TV.

09/19/10 - Today I have just layed around and watched movies. Iron Man, Terminator Salvation, Hangover and the 1st disk of season 2 Sons of Anarchy. I have had a protein shake, won ton soup, 2 pieces of shrimp, couple bites of chicken and a few bites of sugar free pudding. Man, what am I going to do when I have to go back to work. No more sitting around.... well sitting in the comfort of my own home that is. I know I keep saying this but I need to get my lazy butt out of the house and start walking. Sitting here is not getting the weight off.

09/20/10 - I got up this morning to take Aaron to school then hopped back into bed when I got home. Me and Ben slept till about 11am. Then we went to get smoothies and to walk around the mall some. Well we walked around in the halloween store and I was just too light headed and weak so we left to come back home. Good thing too, Ben was feeling pretty bad, when we got back home he went to bed and slept from 230pm to 11pm. I had him go get me some laxatives because I have had a BM in at least a week. I know I am not following my NUT rules. I have been eating small amounts of food for most of last week. But I am only suppose to have liquids. I had this surgery to lose weight and to live a healthier life. But I haven't been able to let go of the bad habits. Those habits are everywhere!! It's going to be so hard for me!

09/10/10 - So about today. Well it has been a good day. I have a little more gas than yesterday but nothing that hurts.  I have sat and slept on the couch most of the day. Got up and walked around the house some. Drank my protein water. I am still sore but that's to be expected. I only take my pain medicine when it's the kind of hurt that I can't get comfortable with. Otherwise, it's a heating pad and lots of pillows

09/11/10 - Let me start out by saying that when I came home Thursday 09/09/10 I weighed 234. Today I weighed 228 so I have lost the extra weight from the gas and fluids given to me at the hospital. Ok now onto today. I got up this morning feeling very lightheaded and nauseous. I took my nausea medicine for the first time since being in the hospital and went back to bed. I played on the computer until I fell asleep. I slept for a few hours and got back up feeling better. I ate the rest of my pudding cup and drank very slowly my water. I am again feeling nauseous. I am thinking that it has to do with not having enough food in me. But again this is to be expected right now.

09/12/10 - Got up feeling ok. Decided to take Aaron to my sister's house in Nashville. Sat at her house for about an hour and got tired. Came back home and watched the Titans with Matthew. Finally got sleepy enough to go lay down in my bed. Got up later on just in time for Ben and Aaron to come home. Again, just sat around watching TV. By the time it was to go back to bed I was feeling very anxious, like my legs wanted to run a marathon or something. Took me forever to fall asleep and even then I layed on the couch in order to sit up some. As far as food goes, I got in a 20oz cup of protein water during the day, SF Pudding, Chicken Broth and popcicles. My tummy doesn't really hurt anymore except when I have gas, even then it's more pressure than pain.

09/13/10 - So after last night I had to get up this morning to go see my therapist. After taking a shower one of my bandages came off. It's ok, it has a steri strip over it. The therapy appointment went well. Took a protein shake with me and only finished about half of it. Ben went to pay bills while I was at therapy. After therapy we just went riding around awhile to enjoy the day. Got home and rested on the couch. Aaron fixed him a tuna sandwich and I took the small amount of tuna left in the can and ate it. You would think the boys were going to think I was going to die or something. They were all over me about eating food while I am suppose to be on liquids. Thankfully my new tummy handled it well.

Everything moved so quickly the day of the surgery. I had to wait about 2 hours before they took me back to get ready. Then it was all a blur. I have 6 incisions that are just painful enough to know they are there. All of the nurses were great, Dr Spaw is great.

Day 2 is the worse so far. I woke up nauseous and in pain. I tried to sleep as much as I could. The nauseous and pain finally got better later in the night.

Day 3 woke up feeling much better. No nauseous feeling but still have pain. I got to come home today.