eboncher07

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So I have my surgery date! Over all yes I'm very excited but I am also very nervous which is completely normal I know. But I have he gap right now and I am horrible at making new friends Lord knows I've tried but right now I honestly don't have a big support system here in VA. My husband leave for an underway the 16Th and wont be back until the 26Th so he wont be here at all for my surgery. I have 1 friend who I know is going to be there for me but all I get is it will be OK. I've tried explaining my nerves but honestly no one really get is and I have gone to some meetings but I either turn into a blubbering idiot cause I'm nervous or I'm a wall flower. So here I am 1 am on July 20Th writing a plea for people who may understand what I'm going through. I know I'm ready for the surgery I just need friend I guess right now.
Love~
Erin

Ok so I am nervous about Wed and I go back to see Dr Hain? I think thats her name. The is my second appointment with her. And I have been making changes in my diet but my activity level is still not improving. I have a full school load right now that ends (THANKFULLY) in a few weeks but I havent really lost any weight. Ive been eating more fish...found that meand my hubby love Boca burgers :) We have been trying so many new things but I'm stuck at the same weight? And I still feel hungry. I don't know what to do! ANy tips?

I am getting better with journaling and cutting back on certain foods. My husband and I found Boca burgers that we like and eat fish 3 times a week now. Turkey burgers for me, but he still loves his regualr burgers. I did find a yummy FF Ceaser dressing I love, I love chicken salads. I also found a yummy fruit salad w/chicken and a rasp walnut vingrette thats fabulous. Im trying my best. I cant say that O I eat healty everyday. LOL girl scout cookies came out! Can ya blame me lol. I know eventually I'll have to say no and I will. Caffine has been hard to quit. Being a full time student there are nights I feel like I need it! I go back and see the nutritionast on the 31st so we shall see.

There is so much information out there its making my head spin. I am taking the classes. I understand what I need to do but I keep getting well this is what you need to eat now and this is what you eat then. Everything changes, I need one step at a time so its blurring the line of what am I supposed to be doing now and what should I be preparing for, if that makes any sense.
Sunday my hubby and I are cleaning out our pantry and getting rid of a lot! Anything I shouldn't be eating is going. We decided to make up menus for the week and take it from there. I am really lucky I have such a wonderful hubby :) Well, its 1 am...i should go to bed! Lots to do tomorrow!

Erin

It should be an interesting day. I get to meet my health psychiatrist for the first time. A little nervous but I think I'll be ok.
Wish me luck!  
Erin

So here I am its midnight and yet again I can't sleep. I have just started my journey and started a food journal and found an interesting trend already. I eat more at night. During the day I am a full time on line student and usually lose time because when I work I tend to absorb myself in it. So I don't eat as much. At night my BIGGEST weakness by far is ice cream. It connects to my childhood. My family was always going to Dairy Queen for everything. If I got an A on a test. If we got into a fight and made up we went to Dairy Queen.  It goes as far back as my Grandfather. My mom and I lived with my grandparents until I was 10. And I would sneak downstairs at night and Grandpa would always get a scoop of vanilla ice cream and the old fashion can of Hersey's syrup. And tell me "Don't tell your mother" as he would grin and walk away. My Grandpa was the main male in my life for a very long time. He passed away in 08 and miss him a lot. I got off on a tangent somewhere. But it feels like if I give it up I give a piece (memory) away of my Grandpa.