Nohemi C.

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Waiting on a revision status :/

ok so I started out at 317 and now  I am down to 209 and cant seem to go down more no matter what maybe im stuck at this weight for a lot of reasons. well first of all my mom recently passed as i have blogged about since sept, it hasn't been easy i find my self eating and vomiting a lot, i know its wrong but i just cant control my self i need help...lol im currently on meds for numerous reasons and that seems to help a bit, i can't believe ive lost over 100 pounds i just don't see it, is that normal? i don't think it will hit me until im trying on smaller sizes im now a size 16/18 depending on the clothes i wear, and i was a 26 before so ten dress sizes should impact me but it hasn't, is that normal?...lol besides all the other non surgical stresses that i have been comfronting i just thank God that i am alive walking and breathing normally and that i have wonderful supportive and loving husband and my awesome family their for me. I just miss my mom so much, it's taking a toll on me physically and emotionally. Well hope my next blog is about me being under the 200 that will be a sound of victory for me! i can't wait!

my mother passed away Aug 31 and we had her funeral service sept 4
this is not what i was expecting I was hoping she would overcome the liver cancer but its real hard to know she is not here
it is harder than i think.
well i need as much prayer that i can get and do. my wieght is getting better im noticing more of a clothe difference than a weight difference anyways don't really feel like talking about that right now.

Ok IT HAS BEEN TWO MONTHS AND 16 DAYS SINCE MY SURGERY.......IM FEELING BETTER PHYSICALLY, BUT I HAVE DEFINATELY COUGHT MY BAD HABITS! LIKE THE OTHER DAY I WANTED TO EAT SOMETHING SALTY BUT NOT BC I WAS HUNGRY BUT BC I WAS CRAVING IT,.........I KNOW ITS BAD! IM FEELING LIKE IM LOOSING TRACK AND IM AFRAID THAT MY STOMACH MIGHT GET BIGGER DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE ANYWAYS THATS WHY IM BLOGGING BC IT REALLY SHOULDNT...LOL SO IVE BEEN EATING LITTLE PORTIONS OF BAD STUFF HERE AND THERE,....DOES ANYONE UNERSTAND ME ? DID THIS HAPPEN TO ANYONE AFTER SURGERY? AHHHHHH WHAT THE HECK! IM A BIT FRUSTRATED AND GOING TRHOUGH A ROLLER COASTER WITH MY OWN PERSONAL ISSUES. TODAY I WENT TO BUY MY PROTEIN SHAKE AND HOPEFULLY GET BACK ON TRACK. EXERCISING IS ANOTHER THING I NEED TO START DOING NOW THAT IVE LOST SOME WEIGHT.....IM AT 250 I STARTED OUT AT 317 SO IM JUST A BIT EMOTIONAL ABOUT THAT. IM GOING TO BE HONEST IM JUST A BIT AFRAID OF EVER BEING THAT WEIGHT AGAIN. I NEED TO RE FOCUS. JUST THIS PAST WEEK I FOUND OUT THAT MY MOTHER HAS BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH CANCER IN HER LIVER....I MEAN IF ITS NOT ONE THING ITS ANOTHER SO I REALLY NEED YOU ALL RIGHT NOW TO HELP ME IN WHATEVER YOU CAN AND PRAYERS ARE ALWAYS THE BEST. ILL KEEP YOU ALL POSTED ABOUT IT LATER ITS NOT SOMETHING THAT IVE SINKED IN ME YET IM HAVING A HARD TIME WITH IT. IM HOPING TO MAKE IT TO MY NEXT GROUP MEETING. PLEASE KEEP ME AND MY FAM IN PRAYERS. THANKS

im so glad that Ive made it this far, it has not been easy but it is getting easier than it did at the beggining!. Im just starting to feel better and notice the 40lbs ive lost since surgery and 60 all together with the 20 i lost pre op. I saw Dr. Katkhouda and he says i look great and that he is glad to see that im still a motivated patient. Im starting to look at some old pics and im like wow what the heck was i thinking....lol but i guess that is everyones reaction. THere are those days though when i feel crappy but it's because ive had something crappy to eat so it's my fault. I hope that soon i will be able to start doing a lot of things that i have limited my self to doing because of my weight one of them being school.....

I have to say that my surgery was a big success. Dr. Katkhouda is the best! I have not had anything to complain about my surgery. The day of surgery I was so nervous I didn't know if I wanted to cry, laugh, or be exited. My family was very supportive they were there for me the whole way. I just knew that after that day my life would be different. I was at USC Hospital for 2 d ays and it was nice, I had a really nice nurse named Rita she was so nice to me. I was off of work for two weeks and I was just trying to adjust the first couple of days that I could only sip on water and like two capsules of water that was the crazy part of it. I have found that really hard to deal with to eat less, it's a mental thing because before I would eat until I was full and just eat because I was craving something now I am more careful with the cravings because on top of that I cannot even have them....lol. I need a lot of help support in that area I want to go back to my old habits but I know I can't and I don't want too. So so far Ive lost 20lbs and it's been a month I feel better physically and working on the emotional part of it. I have to stay focused and that is hard to deal with because all around me there is always unhealthy foods. I just have to work on me emotionally and Ive already started. A lot of people tell me that when I start to loose the weight I will be more motivated and happy but for now Im hanging strong. I thank God because without Him I could not do this and my hubby for being there for me and my awesome family for all there support. Hope my next blog will be a better one. IF you could give me advice on how to deal with cravings and emotional attatchment to food i need all the help I can. I thought  i was ready emotionally until now....but I will make it. I know I will.

IM FINALLY HOME. IM SOOOOO TIREDBUT AT THE SAME TIME HAPPY TO BE ALIVE.  IM GOING THROUGH SO MUCH EMOTIONALLY THAT I DON'T HAVE TIME TO THINK ABOUT DRINKING ANYTHING SINCE THAT IS ALL I CAN DO FOR NOW. I AM TRYING TO STAY IN GOOD SPIRITS AND THAT IS ALL I CAN DO FOR NOW. ILL TELL YOU ABOUT SURGERY LATER, FOR NOW JUST KEEP ME IN GOOD THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS.

Im going into surgery on 3-31-09 and I want to say that I am  a bit nervous but at the same time I think im ok, it's just so much going trhough my mind and all at the same time I am trying to stay focused. Last time I weighed my self I was determined not to ever do it again but afte deciding that I wanted to get this surgery I had to and I was at 317 and when I went to Dr. K's office I was at 314 and now I am at 309 and hoping to loose 10 more before surgery. I am exited and anxious to be able to know what It feels like to be healthy, do activities I normally don't do because of my weight. I want to be able to go to a gym and be motivated and now I can, I am speechless when I just think of how did I let my self go this far its just terrible. I am asking God for a lot of help that I know I will need from Him and Im making my family aware of my changes and eating habits that Ive learned so far. So all I have to say Is IM TAKING MY POSITION!