gretchenpeck
Week 8 Optifast!!!!!!!!!!!
May 17, 2009
So it's been a while since I have posted any new blogs...the past few weeks have been super busy with appointments and I started my life skills classes on thursday, the final phase to my clearance for surgery...I have completed all my appointments to clear me for surgery...it's almost unreal how fast everything is happening...seems like the past 8 weeks have gone by faster then I ever imagined they would and that I would be this close to havingmy surgery scheduled...they're talking about July...I'm ready now but they're already booked through June so Im patiently waitng for the scheduler to call me with a date, hopefully Monday. I have to admit I have days where I can't believe I am actually doing this and then I have days where all I can see is everything coming together...thank God I have such an amazing team helping me through all of this ecspecially my dietician...she has been amazing in everyway and hasn't let me quit or forget my final outcome will be much better than my situation now...though I have to say I feel amazing right now...I have lost 56 pounds since staritng my optifast program on March 26 and working out and it's unreal just how much that little bit of weight has changed my life already in so many ways...Im shopping for new clothes, not to many because I know it's only going to get better but it was wonderful to walk in a store and buy something rather than order it online and not only that but not have to buy the biggest size they had! I'm much more mobile and full of energy but trust me I still have my days...I only lost 3 pounds at my last weigh in on thursday but I knew it would slow down eventually but it's still better than none...trying to stick out these next four weeks is going to be the hardest because the closer I get the more anxious I get...again wondering if Im doing the right thing...I know this is my time but it's still a little scary knowing how drastically my life is going to change...and funny it has nothing to do with eating less or the food just all the other changes that come with it...I turn 30 in November so I'm hoping this will be a big birthday to remember not only because it's the big 30 but because I will hopefully be a lot smaller probably smaller than I have been in the past ten years...there are so many people who have no idea what Im goinig through or what Im about to do...partly because I feel it's my battle and secondly because I need them to see that there was always this other person they could never see... and not physically but the real me...the one they couldn't see because all they were looking at was the outside cover and making all the usual assumptions...I have been on this journey for almost my whole entire adult life and finally this is my time...when it's right it's right and it's all falling right into place...and yet that still a little scary to me...most would think that finally achiveing this goal would be my dream come true and it is but at the same time you worry about how people are going to react...for some reason when you better yourself some people who you thought we're in your corner just can't handle it...but with my family, friends, and God, and of course my new friends here I will make it through this...and I know this is a life long journey now and that once I have my surgery that doesn't mean the end but I have been trapped for so long living a life that I knew wasn't mine and needing to do so much more with myself that I need to keep my head up and keep rolling...as a good friend of mine once said! So I'll continue to work my optifast and hope I loose at least 20 more pounds by the time I finish...and then the scary part will be the wait in between not being on the program and waiting for my surgery which will be a few weeks in between...I just don't want to gain an ounce back of what I have lost and I want to continue to move forward but I know my dietcian Angela will keep me straight! So here's to another long week, or so they seem because they are actually moving right along but when your facing this alone so to speak it can seem like forever...I have a few tests this week and then I'm done...just to wait for the actual date but all I can say is this program turned out to be blessing in disguise and I couldn't be more grateful!
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About Me
Dover, DE
Location
64.2
BMI
Surgery
07/06/2009
Surgery Date
Apr 18, 2009
Member Since
