Going on 4 months out.

Dec 16, 2008

Going through alot of changes, mostly good ones and I think I'm experiencing some depression although I can't imagine why. I'm down to 188 lbs and size 16/18, in that aspect I feel great. But here lately I feel sad, hopeless, I'm not suicidal but I curse the day I was born.I cry on commercials, I cry on comedy shows and I'm doing this privately my husband is not aware of my true feelings. Hell I can't explain it myself, how will I be able to explain it to him. I can be waiting for him to come home from work, cause I miss him, but then the 1st 5 minutes I'm biting his head off with a vengence. I loath my job but yet I appreciate all the things it has made available to me. I've made a dr. appt for Dec 19th to discuss with my pcp, I don't know why this is happening, I feel as though I'm being stupid and I need to just shake it off. And I do, but guess what this feeling comes right back and then I hate my life all over again it's a fricken cycle, what the heck is going on.

0 Comments