kitkat24
Well, listen, as you can see, I have been a member here since Dec 2003. I wonder if I hold the record for member for the longest amount of time, without ever having surgery! Is there a trophy for that?
I have finally come to grips with the fact that I am either going to stay this way 270 or gain weight to 300 and be this way forever, or I am going to have surgery.
I am still worried about the complications.
1. I cannot fit 6 hour iron transfusions into my life.
2. I want the surgery to HAVE ENERGY not have my cells be unable to carry oxygen to my tissue due to low hemoglobin and hematocrit and thus be lethargic.
I can handle pills. I can handle protein drinks. I can handle foamies and fat oil slicked stools. I can handle some pain.
I have talked to 2 people who are meaningful in my life. Sheryl is a born-again Christian too. She talked to me about her viewpoint on weight loss surgery. I also have met on facebook a gal that had the DS that I know who lives in my city! We are having lunch on Monday, July 7th, 2008.
Li has been very sweet on this site. Tammy Bishop is a great resource. I even emailed Dr. Buchwald.
My 71 year old mother is vehemently opposed to me having surgery. She weighs 300 pounds. My sister is vehemently opposed and she weighs 340 pounds. Both of them have diabetes and can barely walk through a store to get groceries.
So, I will be them, who I love, or I will have surgery. It's in my environment. It's in my genes (to a certain extent, and I am not a blame genetics person, I EAT TOO MUCH).
I think after 5-6 years of contemplation. After, 7 years of dieting and failing, eating healthy and failing, trying to change my lifestyle and failing, trying to exercise and failing, and feeling like a huge fat complete failure, that I have come out on the side of the BPD/DS. I can out eat the Roux En Y. And, I already have trouble swallowing at times due to eosinophilic esophagitis. I ALREADY have food get stuck in my esophagous at times. Also, I HAVE TO BE ABLE TO DRINK LOADS OF DARK COFFEE, and I HAVE TO BE ABLE TO TAKE IBUPROFEN for chronic knee pain with history of bilateral cortisone injections and marcaine injections.
My appointment is on 7/16/08 @ 7:00 AM. I am scared. I am afraid to die. Mostly, because I am afraid of what will happen to my boys if I am not here. My oldest son has multiple and severe disabilities.
That's it. I love God. Jesus is the answer to everything. I believe the B I B L E 100%. I will pray that God help me through the surgery and that if I do die on the operating table or of complications like infection or blood clot, that HE will take care of my boys.
Kathy
If you pray, if you love JESUS, if you are a saved, born-again Christian. Please pray for me and my family.
