Teresa D.

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All I can say is "Wow".  Double wow.

Life is so different today. Even though I still have not gone to my goal weight, I am so much healthier than I was before. I have only gained seven pounds from the last time that I logged in and I just can't feel bad about that. I did manage to get down into the 150 range and I know that I can do it again. Right now, I don't stress over my weight, its more about how I feel.

Food is definitely not my friend. It has become what it was meant to be: fuel for my body. I am in much better physical shape now and am in a size 12, presently. I will probably go down one more size and call it a day. This is only because I want to have a tummy tuck. Healthwise, though, I am doing fantastic.

I still eat a ton of protein. I have broken most of my bad  habits, except for the tortilla one. That will happen soon enough but, in the meantime, I thank God everyday that I had this surgery. I am greatful that I feel and look good. I am grateful that there was an option for me that has given me back my health.

As I look back over the last 24 months, I am thrilled. I am delighted. I have not changed at all. I am still the same gregarious, mouthy, silly, and cheerful person I was before. I am not smarter. I am not happier. I find myself just more content and blessed. Life has gotten sweeter. My quality of life rocks and I find myself wanting to share it with others that have the struggles I used to have.

I don't advocate this surgery for everyone. Its a very radical approach to an extreme issue but, for the right people, it can be the answer. My thoughts are that its always good to have an option, especially if you have become serious about your health. I love it. I would still do it over again in a hot minute.

Warmest wishes to you all. May the spirit of the Holidays and the Reason for the Season resonate everyday for you.

Six months have passed since I had my surgery. If someone had told me that I was going to be in a size 14, weighing 165 lbs...that I was going to be 70 lbs lighter, I would have laughed. I think the biggest obstacle that I had was not being able to imagine myself where I am at now.

I am sooo over that. Today I sit here thinking about what its  going to be like when I lose the last 30 lbs and weigh 135 lbs. Not "IF" I am going to be able to make it or perhaps or maybe...nope, now its WHEN I weigh 135 lbs. I know what I will wear and how I will feel. I look around for the clothes that I will wear and how awesome I am going to feel. Its all about health for me now.

This surgery has truly been a gift. Everyday I make sure to give a little prayer of thanks for it. I would do this again in a hot minute.

Today was quite the day...I have not weighed in the 180s  since I was in Korea in 1996..hmmm...that was only 12 years ago. As each day goes by and a new person is emerging physically, I have come to realize that I am still the same inside. My outside is getting much healthier all the time and that was, after all, the goal. All of a sudden, 135 doesn't seem that far away.

I have spent a couple of hours reading other peoples posting. The one that struck me the most was the girl that started out where I did and was complaining because she wanted to be a size 0. A size 0? After losing over a 120 lbs, she is angry because she wanted to a be size 0! I was struck by the greediness of her wanting more weight loss.  I see anorexia in the near future for her and I was sad for her.  I said a silent prayer for me to be mindful of my progress and be thankful for each baby step as it comes.

I need to upload my latest pic soon...I have been on the Bowflex almost daily now and its starting to show. I was actually looking forward to doing it when I got home today...as a matter of fact, I am off to do that now.

Honeymoon is over! I am being a snotty brat and letting my head hunger make me momentarily unhappy. I know that its just a pity party when I want ice cream, guacamole, a hamburger, and all the stuff that got me to where I was before the surgery. 

Fortunately, I threw up once when I ate too much too soon and it was unpleasant enough for me to remember. As I watched my husband wolf down his chicken quesadilla, I remembered and gladly ate my two tablespoons of refried beans and gave a little prayer of thanks. ((sigh))

I am thinking of going back to work. I am still very fatigued after the complications of the surgery but I am also bored, bored, bored. Its got to be cabin fever. I have watched more TV in the last three weeks than I have in the last three years. My poor husband gets smothered when he gets home from work but I think that he secretly enjoys it.

I have been working hard on my eating. I have gone down to three meals and a snack per day. I am eating anywhere between 300 and 500 calories per day, mostly protein. (I am paranoid of losing hair so I am obsessed with protein!). Anyway, eating every four hours knocked out one mini-meal and lowered my caloric intake a bit. This should keep me in check.

I am eagerly waiting for my BowFlex to get here. I am doing some minor walking but I feel I should be doing more. Always so impatient, huh?!

Not much else to report other than I am getting ready to return to work. The gods smile upon me: I return to work on January 7th and turn around to go to Hawaii on January 10th for a week. My employer is not pleased but that's how the chicken stews when leave is approved six months ahead of time. As my surgery was scheduled last minute, it all kinda came together like this. I will dry my eyes as I wave "Aloha".

My major update: I am down 28 lbs since I began this crazy adventure and 15 lbs since I left the hospital.

This is my first blog entry and I hope that it is useful to someone, as the one's that I read were very useful to me.

My name is Teresa and I had my surgery on December 5, 2007. The surgery was to take three hours but they were done forty five minutes early. The surgery itself was flawless...unfortunately, my body was not. I developed internal bleeding and my blood pressure dropped dramatically. I eventually ended up receiving four units of blood and the developed a major infection. The three day hospital stay turned into a five day hospital stay and it was grueling. My bad, though, because my misery was caused by not knowing that the bed was adjustable. I slept on the wrong size bed for four nights and was miserable. Fortunately, the RN and the CNA on my last night there figured it out and fixed it for me. It was heavenly. Duh!

In hindsight, I know that I would do this again in a hot minute. I trust my people at Group Health. I was so impressed by the doctors and the nursing staff there that I bought and sent them the biggest fruit and goodie basket I could find and sent it to them. They rocked. 

Anyway, on to life after the surgery. I have a huge hemotoma/bruise that runs all the way from hip to hip and from my navel to my pubic hair line. It looks like someone hit my over and over with a bat or a 2x4. My belly looks like it should be on a corpse. I guess its from the internal bleeding that I had. The blood pooled there as it had nowhere else to go (I am told).

I have five openings as my surgery was done laproscopically and they look great. Neat little staples that don't bother anyone and don't hurt. The only thing I worry about is the hernia that I had repaired once that seems to have reappeared. I will take that up with the doctor on my follow up.

My biggest disappointment is how I have lost my enjoyment of eating. I am not really hungry but I have to eat. Its a chore now and I don't enjoy doing it. The concept of eating to live is hard because I am Mexican and we involve food with every occasion, good or bad. That will take some major adjusting on my part.

Anyway, enough for today. I will write more tomorrow as I am off for a couple of more weeks.