missmollyk
Finally went to my first seminar for Dr.Higa's team in Fresno. Turns out I am actually using Dr. Higa himself as my surgeon. I have my first appointment on April 29th, and then it's off to the races! I am very excited about finally doing something serious about my health.
April 29, 2002
Had my first appointment with Dr.Higa's assistant, Alice. She was very straight forward and funny. She was truthful about possible risks and was happy that I had been researching the process and brought some records. Now they want me to start eating as if I have already had the surgery, smaller portions, no junk food and soda. She wanted me to up my protein and cut back on breads. Walking and exercise of course. If you can lose weight before the surgery it is better for the surgeon. In the meantime, waiting for my psych evaluation appointment and sleep study. Zzzzzzzz.
May 31, 2002
just found out that they had submitted my paperwork to Aetna May 15, 2002, so I could hear something any day. Let's hope that it is good news. My sleep study was a disaster, I couldn't sleep! Turns out I may have to do it again, but my doctor's office said that I may not have to submit that information anyhow. Will keep everyone updated.
June 7, 2002
I am approved! Yippee! I bugged Aetna everyday and found that they could not find my paperwork (sent 5/15/02) so they gave me a fax number on Monday, and today, I got my approval in the mail! It only took 2 days through Aetna Open Choice PPO. The date they gave me was 7/18/02, but I still have to schedule with Dr. Higa. I cried I was so happy!
June 15, 2002
After many phone calls, Laurie at Dr. Higa's managed to get approval from Aetna for St. Agnes hospital at 70% coverage since Clovis Community could only take me in the fall (at 90%). I was willing to pay the difference considering I am almost done with my BA and would hate to have surgery right before my finals! Also, I have the whole summer off to recover. I got a message from Blanca, the scheduler, saying my the first date available would be July 16...not too B-A-D. I have to call back today to find out all the details to pre-op. Advice: Valley Surgical Center is EXTREMELY busy and you really have to take responsibility for your treatment by following up with many many phone calls. In a perfect world, one would not have to do this, but this is reality. If I leave a message and no one calls back, I keep calling until I get someone. I also figured out if you get the voice mail, you need to hit the "priority" button to get a call back. I have even though about volunteering to return phone calls for them, they are so swamped. I am very excited about WLS, so much so it is all consuming at times. I woke up at 3am fantasizing about being able to fit in a desk at CSUF without being wedged in like a sardine.
7/18/02 I made it and I feel like I did a million sit-ups and then got punched in the tummy! However, considering the fact that I had my insides rearranged, I am doing well enough to get on the computer and update everyone. Fluids are a bit difficult, things taste funny due to the anesthesia. I had relatively no nausea, I just took the compazine just in case. Soreness from gas in the shoulder and upper stomach area. It is not easy to recover from this, but I am up and around and feeling good considering the seriousness of the procedure. Dr. Higa was terrific and the staff at the hospital was excellent. Not much sleep with all the ruckus and being woken up for vitals, but I do recommend..if you have an easy chair, great to sleep in when you get home!
7/29/02 Well, things took a turn for the worse, and on 7/20 I had to be rushed to the hospital for a second surgery. My intestine kinked according to my doc and I was in some serious pain and discomfort. I spent a week in the hospital, which was none too pleasant...but all is fixed. Now I can drink without discomfort and pain. My doctor put a feeding tube in my stomach to help me get nutrition for the next couple of weeks, I have to pour Ensure in there three times a day, hardly a glamorous outcome. Anyhow, I don't think my doctor did anything wrong, it was just one of those things that can happen after a surgery like this...I feel he was very attentive to me and was truly concerned about taking care of the problem and being sure that all things that could be prevented or fixed were taken care of. I have a follow up this Wednesday and then the feeding tube will come out soon. I hope that isn't a big deal. I had pea soup today and it was wonderful after weeks of water, Jello and Crystal Lite. So far I have lost 12 pounds, but I know I am retaining water from the hospital's IV.
8/21/02
Just a little update...I did end up getting the feeding tube out after a few weeks, and I feel much better! I am eating solids and find that I can eat most anything (healthy that is) and have none of the dreaded vomiting or dumps...knock on wood! I finally posted a picture here with my husband (who could stand to lose a few too...but I'm not saying anything) and can't wait to post a thinner, younger looking me down the road.
8/27/02
Oh, I forgot...I have lost 25 pounds so far...and for the last week and a half, not a darn thing! I go up a pound and then down a pound, up a pound, down a pound. Can we say PLATEAU? And soooo sooon! Wahhhh! Anyhow, I know that more weight will come off soon, but it is so frustrating when you are barely eating anything and you stop losing weight. I figure I have an all-too efficient body, that is very good at surviving famine.
9/4/02
Hey, hey, I have lost 31 pounds, 25 inches and 20 pounds of fat! Woo hoo! They measured me at the gym today. This morning I fit in my size 20 jeans comfortably. I finally beat my plateau by reading the valuable information here on the site and increasing my protein and practically cutting out starchy carbs. The weight loss ball started to roll again at the tune of a pound a day, so I guess the high protein thing works! My stomach suddenly got fussy this week, so the little bit of protein I have been eating seems to satisfy just fine.
9/12/02
Another freakin' plateau has wrapped it's dark veil around me (pretty dramatic-eh?) Since last post, only lost 2 pounds and the last week have been holding at 219/220 (depending on the day). I have a visit with Dr. Higa next week, I hope he isn't disappointed with my weight loss. I have been so good, exercising, drinking my fluids, eating high protein...I guess I get impatient sometimes because I want to be thin! However, it seems that the inches are going, I was able to zip up a pair of 18's even though they were obscenely tight, I could get them on. I figure two more weeks or so and they should fit just right.
9/30/02 Well, my BMI is now 38.6...now I am just "severely obese", instead of "morbidly obese". Plateau seems to be my middle name, I get all worked up around the scale with these daily weigh-ins...but after I charted it all out on my calendar, I realize I am averaging about 3 pounds a week. Not too bad. I weighed in at 211.5 this morning, that's minus 42 pounds. I did get into those 18's and went and bought another pair...5 days later they are too large. Ha! Anyhow, went to my sister's annual BBQ and all of the guests who hadn't seen me in a couple of years really noticed a difference. I did make the mistake of having a few tortilla chips...got a slight dumping episode that only lasted 20 minutes and sent me a-poopin'. I'll keep on updating for all you thirsty readers.
10/9/02 I am currently at 208, so that is 45.5 pounds lost. I am hungry more frequently now, so I carry Met-RX Protein Plus bars with me, I eat only 1/2 at a time or I get a slight dumping feeling. I am really starting to see a difference in my body and people are starting to notice. I bought a dress for Dr.Higa's formal event (for post-ops) and it was a size 14W, granted, I think the brand ran a little large, but I tried on several dresses in 16W and they were very roomy. I will probably have to have the dress taken in (the dance is on Nov.16) but I got such a deal on it and it was so perfect! My hubby has never been to a prom or anything like it, so he'll be wearing a tux and having his first black-tie experience. I think it will be a kick. Only 9 more pounds and I'll be below the 200 mark! Woooooohooooo!
10/18/02
Today, I weighed 204.5, only 1 pound to the 50 pound mark! Woo hoo! Yesterday was a day I just noticed how much smaller I looked. I have 80 pounds to get to my goal. Only 5 pounds to get below 200.
11/9/02
Finally, I got to the 200 mark, lingered for about a week, then ended up at 196 a couple of days ago...seems that even though plateaus are extremely frustrating, I always "catch up" loss-wise by the time it's over. I am finally looking somewhat "normal" and bought size 16W jeans this week. Men are starting to notice me and I am beginning to get so much energy back! Unfortunately, I am not sure if this is stress- or RNY related- I have been having a semi-continuous period...so I am a little bloated and crampy. I am on Depo-Provera and usually don't even get a period, so this is an unexpected visit. Anyhow, I feel that I should get down to about 175 by X-mas, and that would be awesome because I fit into normal sizes at that weight! Woo hoo! I hope I get lots of gift certificates. Total weight loss now is -57 pounds and I have lost over 47 inches.
12-4-02
Wow, really has been a while since I updated! I am down to 188 as of this morning and wearing a pretty comfortable size 14W/16 misses....I have these two pairs of size 12 Misses Levis that I felt so thin and sexy in before, and guess what? I put them on as a lark, thinking I'd be lucky if they went past my knees, but guess what? I not only got them on, but was able to zip them up. However, they are WAY too tight to wear just yet, I think about 10 more pounds and I can safely wear them without getting an indecent exposure ticket. -65 pounds and holding for the last few days, but I have not been as good about exercising...so I started back on my routine this week. I get measured today at Curves and that is always a motivating situation when I see all the inches and fat melt away in a month's time! Starting to get lots of looks from the guys, and I am thankful since my hubby has been such a butt lately...maybe he'll wise-up. Until next time....
December 20, 2002
My hubby's b-day today. I weighed in at 184.5 this morning, so minus 69 pounds..only 30 pounds away from my mini-goal of -100! You can be sure I will post a picture when that day comes. I have been on quite a plateau that even included at two pound gain a few days ago..I cut out the carbs...and Viola! Minus a few pounds this morning. It will be hard to keep away from carbs during the holidays, especially since I have found I don't dump much anymore...but I will stay the course as best as I can. I have been really good about going to the gym, and now I have a few weeks off, so I have no excuses! I am going to slip on those size 12s again just for fun to see how close I am getting.
January 7, 2003
Funny how the holidays put you in a time warp...18 days since the last update! Wow. I have finally broken the horrid plateau and have lost a total of 74 pounds, only 26 pounds to my mini goal of -100 and only 54 pounds to my big goal. I weigh 179 this morning and want to get to 125. I am wearing the fabled size 12 jeans as I type this, and though snug, they fit! Yeah! I know they'll be loose in a couple of weeks. Been nursing an upset tummy, and being the sick diet-fiend I am I am looking forward to the weightloss from my flu. You know what I am talking about. I just figured out how to use my digital camera, so I hope that I can post my -74# picture here...
January 16, 2003
It's been 6 months since my surgery, and I am minus 78 pounds. I started the Atkins plan last Sunday and I have been back in the swing of losing weight...so far I have lost 2.5 pounds this week and it's only Thursday! Yeah! Now I know what to do if the scale is stubborn, protein, fats and very little carbs.
January 25, 2003
Went up three pounds, down two pounds, hovering around 176...sort of frustrating, really stuck to my Atkin's induction. I think I may extend it for one more week and see what happens. I bought a pair of leather chaps to wear on my bike and I felt pretty sexy in them. <> Still in size 12, but know that by the end of February I will at least get into a 10-or at least that is my goal! Weight loss has really slowed down with many plateaus...I just hope to hit the -100 mark by the time I see Dr.Higa in March! On the BMI chart I am now only "obese" instead of "morbidly" or "seriously", almost to the "overweight" category. Ha!
February 16, 2003
Today is my 7 month anniversary since my surgery, I am -84.5 pounds, (169 pounds) and went from a tight 24 to a loose 12, sometimes a 10 depending on the manufacturer. That averages out to 12 pounds a month or so, not too bad. The weight loss has slowed and I hit plateaus all the time, but I am losing anywhere from 1-2 pounds a week still...so I guess I have no complaints. I already went through all my "thin" clothes. :-)
My sister who is very slender is giving me some hand-me-downs...some may fit and some may be for the future. I am still keeping up the exercise and also eating as much protein as possible. I definitely look different, I think the last 10 pounds I have lost have really changed the shape of my face...everyone is suddenly noticing my weight loss.
February 27, 2002
Down to 166 and still losing! Wow, that is minus 88 pounds if I did my math correctly. I am the thinnest I have ever been in my adult life. Wow.
March 7, 2003
Size 10, weight at 165. 'Nuff Said!
March 20, 2003
163 pounds as of this morning. Visited Dr. Higa yesterday, of course his scale always says 2 pounds more than you weigh naked (clothes of course make you weigh more) but Alice was very ha-ppy with my loss. Unfortunately, I did not get to visit with Dr.Higa, just a quick wave in the hallway. I am at -90 pounds. Oh, for those of you reading this, the second picture is minus 75 pounds, so I look even better now. :-) I will post more pics soon....
March 24, 2003
Last night tried on some "too small" clothes to get an idea...they suddenly fit. Weighed in this morning at 160.5. Yeah! Plateau is broken. Let's see how far it goes this time. I rewarded myself by ordering some clothes (hopefully they'll still fit by the time they are delivered!) Almost into the 150s--I have not seen the 150's since highschool. This is a dream come true!
April 8, 2003
I am writing this entry to give me something to look back on if this should happen again. In the meantime I am freaking out...I have gained 3 pounds in the last few days, and I have actually cut back a little on my food! I think it is female stuff coming up and because I had to stop exercising (I hurt my back.) Damn! I was so close to the -100 mark. I am going to Hawaii in June and wanted to be down at least another 10 pounds...but I guess I'll just have to let nature take it's course. I am so damn impatient! Anyhow...I will try to think positive. I know I am panicking because I have that scared thought in the back of my mind that this is all temporary and I will be fat again...Ahhh!
April 13, 2002
Weight is slowly going back to 160..I was 161 this morning. This not exercising thing is making me nuts! Anyhow, I can try and walk some more. I have figured out I am definitely pre-menstral, I have acne along my jaw line, my boobs hurt and I am crabby, and BLOATED...so I would say that once that is all over, there will be a decent drop in weight. I hope it isn't too optimistic to see myself below 160? Yesterday my hubby and I rode our bikes around (Harleys) and my friend Tracy saw me pull into Starbucks and called me later to "make sure" it was me...she recognized Rob, recognized our bikes, but exclaimed, "You looked so TINY, I wasn't sure if it was actually you." Wow, I haven't been called tiny in my whole life. What a high to hear THAT! So I guess I will deal with the PMS issues for a while longer, since I'm already "tiny." LOL Going down to visit my mom and friends for Passover this coming weekend...we'll see if anyone else thinks I am "tiny". Maybe I should change my nickname "Shorty" to "Tiny?"
April 14, 2003
Oh, one more addition to my earlier comments...I am wearing a size 38 C bra now. I have not worn a C bra since high school! I mean, I had bras that were definitely not holding up the twins and I went to Victoria's Secret (her secret is her bras don't fit fuller bosomed people) and got measured and fitted, and whatta LIFT. Hee hee. Finally can buy all those cute and sexy bras that don't have straps as wide as the 101 freeway.
April 15, 2003
Hear ye! Hear Ye! I have finally broken the plateau. 159.5 as of this morning. Goodbye 160's hello 150's.
April 16, 2003 (nine month anniversary)
I know I am not supposed to weigh every day, but it is like scratching off a Lotto ticket...exciting and sometimes disappointing. 158.5 this morning.
April 17, 2003
Down another pound..157.5 today. I have been using the Keto-stix that check for ketosis when doing Atkins. Very accurate way to tell if I am losing weight. When they turn the dark color, in ketosis, usually means weight loss. :-) -96 pounds, only 4 away from the Century Club!
April 21, 2003
Had a great weekend, went down to visit family and spent Friday evening with my other WLS friend Kelly. We had a great time dancing at the local Elks club. I felt really good in my new jeans and shirt, and guys were definitely checking me out (but never asked to dance. Sigh!) My family was very impressed with how "tiny" I was (there's that word again) and I even wore my new size 8 swimsuit in the hottub, though tight, I looked good. I got home and my Fake Bake arrived (a new self-tanner) and I have to say it is the best one I have ever tried. It doesn't smell funky, and I look like a Native American after one application. I recommend it, I plan to buy GALLONS. I weighed 158 this morning, looks like the bouncing scale is at it again, however I have been in major ketosis this whole last week, so I think the weight will come off soon. I am hoping to get to the -100 by May 1st. I will get to go back to the gym again then.
May 7, 2003
I finally got to -100, now I have to figure out how to scan in some new pics! I am wearing a size 8 as of yesterday. My GOD! One digit clothing!!! Anyhow, 153.5 but of course the case of the bouncing scale again...up a pound today. Ugh! Anhow, I treated myself to a gym membership on my birthday, tomorrow I finally get with a trainer. I just got some photos back from a couple of weeks ago...I look NORMAL. It's so strange! I am so happy with my results, I have 29 more pounds to my goal, I suspect with weight training I can do it within 6 months (my goal.) I am actually buying small clothes!
May 20, 2003
Finally broke my plateau from the last entry. Now I work out with weights and I think that has made all the difference, even though I am now 151 pounds, I look smaller and wear a size 8. That is amazing to me. I am only 26 pounds to my goal!
May 22, 2003
Down to 150...goodbye 150's, hello 140's! I am finally officially further from 200 than from 100. :-)
June 1, 2003
As usual, the plateau queen has struck again. I did the yo-yo all month, I am at 150 (again, after going up as much as 3 pounds ) but I know 149 is just around the corner. Regardless, I have lost a lot of inches, not only do I see a major difference in my appearance, but I went to buy clothes yesterday and I fit in size 7 in a few things, and smalls instead of mediums! the only bummer, lost a lot of boobage. I also was able to put on my sister's size 8 slim cut Wranglers, and I must say I look great in them. I can't wait to wear them to the Santa Maria Rodeo this weekend. I feel great about my accomplishment, I recommend changing to weight routine once you get 30 pounds from goal weight, you can begin to shape yourself and burn a lot more calories.
June 5, 2003
I finally hit 149.5 and I am sure I'll go between that weight and 150 for another week or so...I am getting used to the wobbling scale..but I am not as frustrated, as my work outs are giving me awesome results. I can see changes almost weekly and am adding more weight which tells me I am getting stronger in my workouts. I also figured out how to use self-tanner so it doesn't look streaky or weird (or smell!) I mix it with my perfumed lotion before applying, seems to dilute it a bit so it goes on more evenly. I am going to Hawaii thinner than I was in highschool the first time I went. As of today, - 104.5 pounds
June 9, 2003
Free at last! Free at last! I weighed 151 again two days ago, then this morning the miracle happened. I weighed in at 147 (my heart raced as the numbers landed in the 140s...I jumped for joy!) Anyhow, I am the weight I was when I was 12...amazing! I had a great weekend, I saw people I hadn't seen in over a year and a half...what shock for them. They did double takes, some even walked right by me and came back a few minutes later...Wow! I felt like a movie star, they couldn't believe how great I looked. On a more negative note, things with my marriage are getting rough...but having this surgery has given me the confidence to do what I have to do to make myself happy. So..hopefully we can work things out.
June 19, 2003
I had a short shine in the spotlight at 146, then up to 149 with the onset of womanly issues, then this morning 148.5. Ahhh! I am working so hard at the gym and it is definitely paying off, but I am still obsessed with the stupid scale! Today I was brave enough to wear a tank top with a shelf bra...arms out, boobs out...no funny looks, so I guess I do not look too bad. Possibly buying a house soon, that'll give me something to work on and also starting a new job when I get back from Hawaii...the new store manager for Indian Motorcycle in Visalia. I think my life is finally pulling together!
June 21, 2003
This morning, down to 146.5, oddly enough I didn't even work out yesterday. I feel like I have been a pig all week, snacking alot and not being particualarly careful about my carbs. About to go to Hawaii, so I guess I'll have to not look at the scale for a week, probably a good thing. In the meantime, had my legs waxed yesterday and the girl who was doing it was also a WLS patient! She looked incredible, I could never imagine this woman being heavy. We really had a lot in common. Sort of a cool thing. Also, good news-I am being published in a state-wide biker magazine, "Shift-N-Gears". I am even going to submit a photo...this time I am not embarrassed to have my picture
taken.
July 3, 2003
Today will be my first day at my new job at Indian Motorcycles. I am so pissed off, I just got back from Hawaii and gained about 4 pounds..I am back up to 150--scared the hell out of me when I saw those numbers again. I have to admit I was eating a lot of carbs in Hawaii, but I still did exercise, as a matter of fact more than usual and I still managed to gain weight. However, once again, the monthly visit has arrived, just to torture me and I think at least 3 pounds of that is water retention. I'll know in a week or so. In the meantime, started Atkin's induction again as of yesterday, hoping to kickstart everything...would like to lose a few pounds before my appointment with Dr. Higa on the 16th. We'll see...First time in my life I wore a bathing suit in public AND shorts and didn't feel like everyone was looking at my blubber. My sister gave me a bikini...which I wasn't brave enough to wear, but I did try on and it was actually a little too big anyhow. LOL I bought a great Extra Small dress on the island, I don't think I have ever worn that size in my life. My brother barely recognized me (Hasn't seen me since last August!)
July 17, 2003
Yesterday I had my year anniversary and check up. All went well, though I didn't get to see Dr. Higa himself, I did get to see that I was only a pound over the weight they wanted me to be...though I want to weigh 125, they felt 144 was appropriate for my muscle/fat ratio, etc...Wow! I don't think I have ever had a dr. visit where my weight was not an issue! I also switched to the Nuvaring birthcontrol at the advice of my clinician...she said the shot may prevent me from losing all the weight I want or even keeping it off, and I also was getting tired of my period showing up every other week. Yeah!
July 31, 2003
I was a little piggy this week. Is it stress related? Probably. I carbo-loaded like never before and am really scared to step on the scale. My hubby and I went to Reno after a few stressful weeks (our purchase of buying a house fell through, I quit my job, Rob got let go from his job, the list goes on...) Anyhow, I ate crappy and of course felt crappy...haven't been to the gym in over a week. I plan to get my lazy ass up tomorrow to work out and get back on track. I did better today and watched my proteins and carbs...felt much better! I seem to be the WLS central in my area...heard from my buddy Denise who had a successful post-op, then from my neighbor, then from my Aunt's friend who had a revision...I guess I'll have to get my doctorate so I will be able to counsel all these people! I am thinking of going back to school for my Psychology Doctorate with the total support of my hubby...but I am scared! Well, I guess losing 110 pounds was scary too.
August 10, 2003
Hmmm...I can be so wishy-washy at times, first I say I am moving to Reno, then I'm not, then I am going back to school, then I am not...Lahahah! As you can see I have been quite a basket case and find that head hunger is worse than ever, though when I put it in perspective I am holding it together pretty well. In addition to all the other stresses, I am having a real period for the first time in years (the whole bleeding, cramping, weepy, bloated and tired thing) and it is really wiping me out. In addition, I have had and will have some job interviews, but I am feeling that my business idea (which shall remain a secret until things are rolling) is about to be snatched if I don't do it myself. Life is so complicated. My mother in law is dying of leukemia--we've been told we only have 1/2 to a year with her left. Talk about stress. My hubby is holding it together pretty well considering and is actually being very supportive, dare I say pushy about my business idea. Well, darn it, it couldn't hurt, the worst thing that happens is I am out some $$. I couldn't tell you my weight today, I have been so bloated and out of sorts, I am sure I am up a few...so I will wait until the period is over and I have gone back to the gym for a few days. Life is real. Over and out.
August 12, 2003
Weighed in, back to 143, even after all the pigging out and period stuff. Yahoo! Now I can work on getting below the 140's. I think I am going to use my NuvaRing continuously until I run out and then switch to the IUD, tired of the hormone blues. I forgot to tell a few fun tales. Firstly, when we went to the coast to help Rob's mother do her legalities, my own attorney did not recognize me. He actually introduced himself to me. LOL Then today...Rob and I went to Starbuck's and when we were about to leave a guy came in to buy a coffee. As I put my dishes in the receptical, according to my husband, he was so busy checking out my butt that he didn't realize Rob was watching him until he turned and was startled by Big Rob's smiling face. He knocked over his coffee everywhere. I didn't know why Rob was snickering as we left the store until he told me. Well! Also I got carded about three weeks ago at a club. Yeah! I feel better today for sure.
August 17, 2003
Just a quick note, finally broke the 143 barrier, weighed in at 142 today! Yehaw! I wonder if I can get into the 130's? I would love to be at goal by X-mas, that is only 5 months away...I have about 17 pounds to goal, that means about 3 pounds a month, I guess that may be wishful thinking. Anyhow, I am getting my butt back to the gym tomorrow (Monday) no excuses!
August 25, 2003
I still have not gone to the gym but I am losing weight, I am down to 139, incredibly. I don't know if the workouts were making me hold the weight, but I fear if I dont get back to working out I am going to get super flabola. Anyhow, I look great, that's the most important thing (LOL)
September 5, 2003
I have now gone over a month without working out and I am back up to 143.5...I guess it's better than being over 200 pounds, but I am severly disappointed in myself, I was so disciplined before. I guess I have been pretty down lately, having marital problems and then trying to find work...I can see that my eating and exercising habits are thrown by the way side when I am down in the dumps, which is exactly the wrong thing to do. If I exercise and eat right I generally feel better. I also switched my birth control to the NuvaRing and I think the hormones are making me nuts. I am going to get the IUD next month, so maybe that will even out the moods. I am going back to the gym first thing tomorrow morning...I might even take a class for kicks.
September 11, 2003
Back to my old self, period over, weight 141.5...maybe the period theory is true. Still have not gotten to the gym. I know once I get my butt in there I'll be hooked again. I think my biggest problem areas are my thighs and upper arms..gotta work it! Been better on my eating habits. I found this no sugar added ice cream by Breyer's...I just had two tablespoons with cut up nectarine last night and it satisfied my sweet tooth.
September 17, 2003
For those of you fans of my journal and success....I did go to the gym this morning, finally. I got my fat butt up at 5am and actually worked out...I feel 100 times better about myself and know that I will go again tomorrow morning. My weight is still at 141 but I know if I keep going it will drop again.
September 25, 2003
Well, I finally got to 138, only 13 pounds from my goal of 125. Amazing what leaving your husband can do for someone! I find it ironic that since my journey began I was the one who stayed true to our marriage, regardless of the attention and proposals I had gotten from men, yet my husband was the one who could not keep himself from straying...alcoholism, lying, cheating...it's all in the mix, and I wonder why I put up with it for so long (except for the fact that I was madly in love with this man) but perhaps feeling better about myself has also turned him off about me and turned myself on to..well myself! I am staying at my parents' until I find my own place and have a job. I am sure that I will be giving some very interesting updates in the near future. For those of you that have been following my journey, please pray for me to get over this broken heart!
October 6, 2003
The last couple of weeks have been hard with this break-up, but my WLS buddy, Kelly, has been such a source of support and love, I don't think I could've left the jerk without her! We have been going to the gym together and spending time going out on the town the last two weekends. Even though I sort of miss my soon-to-be ex, I know I am doing the right thing by leaving. The amount of stress I was under was immeasureable. I have lost more weight because I am so busy and my appetite has waned, either because I am happier, or I am really stressed, hard to say. I am only 11 pounds from goal, but friends and family say I am starting to look too thin...so I am not going to worry about those last pounds, if they come off, that is great...if they don't, as long as I don't gain any more weight, I'll be happy.
October 13, 2003
Looking at the Halloween costumes this year is not nearly as depressing as it has been in the past. Those flimsy little costumes for perfect little women actually fit me now! I am planning something sexy or pretty for a change (versus the usual comic costume). I have run into a few old friends and enemies since my return to the coast, I have to say it is a hoot to see the shocked or pleased look on their faces when they realize it's me. I have been going to the gym more regularly, I realize my lack of gym-going was due to my fear of leaving the soon-to-be exhusband home alone, I was always afraid he'd be cheating on me or drinking or both...I feel like I have my life back--even though I miss the rat bastard from time to time. I have been hit on a lot in the last few weekends, it's a lot of fun, but I have kept it to flirtation for the most part, not sure I am ready to get involved with anyone yet...hopefully not for a long time!
October 21, 2003
Got in my new place yesterday and started my new job last week things are going great. I am a little lonely in this big house all by myself, I am seriously considering getting Percy back (my dog). I am still flummoxed by all the attention I get. Men come up to me to tell me how pretty I am and ask me to dance or give them my number. I am still not ready for that, but enjoy the attention. I am actually in a size 4 petite now, this divorce and all my running around has made the weight loss restart, plus I have been going to the gym more since Kelly and I support each other. I am only 9 pounds from my goal of 125, I am sure I will reach it by X-mas. New Clothes I hope from Santa this year. I am so thankful for the surgery.
October 30, 2003
Well, the tavern wench costume was a big hit at the singles dance I was dragged to last night. Lots of men hitting on me, one in particular was the best looking man that has ever approached me in my life (besides Randy). He told me he had seen me before at various places (I did recognize him) and he was intimidated about talking to me because he thought I would not be interested. Wow, it's weird to be thought of as one of the "beautiful untouchables" when I was always a wanna-be desireable. Anyhow, this surgery has allowed me to take of the fat "costume" and be the real me...
November 17,2003
As you can see my updates have waned...still losing a few more pounds, about 20 since I got away from the horrible ex. I am wearing a loose size 4...size 6's are just plain too big! Wow! I thanked God today as I sat in the bathtub with tons of room and thought about all the shocked and pleased faces of people I have run into here in my old home town. I have so many dates these days it's wearing me out! Gotta slow down. I am just so glad I did this for myself.
March 12, 2003
So much has happened since the last entry. I am all settled in my new life in Santa Maria. I have a new boyfriend, actually I met him in June, but we didn't start dating or even talking until I moved back here in October. I am up a few pounds to 133 but holding steady at a size 4. I am currently starring in a play which I have not done in ages! I am sure being smaller made it easier to cast me. I am still working at the fountain company and love it! I am healthy for the most part and still dealing with divorce issues, seems my ex-husband is determined to not only make this divorce my fault, but to make me miserable if at all possible. What a sick man, I pity him for the most part and other days I want to throttle him! Still running into old friends and shocking them with my new appearance. The biggest problem I have been having is controlling the urge to snack all the time. I do keep healthy snacks around though, so I think that is my saving grace. Also, I think my hormones must have made a major change because I have terrible adult acne on my back, chest and jawline. I am going to a dermatologist at the end of this month to see if he/she can help me with this. So anyhow, life is good and once again I thank God for the opportunity to live in a healthy body!
March 22, 2004
I have officially gone from normal/healthy weight to overweight. I weighed in this morning at 140 and I almost keeled over. I have been on the straight and narrow all day long, watching my carbs and snacking. Just need to go back to the gym and get those 7 pounds off that I just gained. I am sure the lack of exercise, the junk I have been eating and constant grazing are all the culprits, and most of all dealing with stress! I need to read the rules of WLS again and go back to all the things I was doing right.
March 24, 2004
I have gone down to 138 since last post, have been eating fruit and more healthy foods the last two days, surpirisingly got a cold regardless of my healthy ways. I noticed my appetite is decreasing a little bit. I think I can at least drop another 3 pounds before I go to Cleveland to see family I have not seen in 4 years. Should be interesting. Trying to post a new picture on here, but it is taking a while.
March 25, 2004
Down to 135 today, looks like I am back on track. I guess eating a wider variety of HEALTHY foods, cutting down on the nighttime snacking and using fitday.com really helps me stay on track. Oh, and going to the grocery store and stocking up no good foods helps as well! Feeling better in general even though I have a cold!
April 12, 2004
My trip to Cleveland went well. My dad drove past me in the airport 3 times before I finally got up to his car and knocked on the window, he didn't know who I was at first! I think I just about shocked every relative I saw. In the meantime, I have not had a period since I went off of my birth control. I know for a fact I am not preggers, but irritated because I have some of the PMS stuff (weepy, impatient, sore breasts, cramps...) oh, and weight gain! Yick! I am back up to 140 and very frustrated. I just want to knock off about 10-15 pounds. I wish my period would either get here or go away all together. I ate very little the last few days and usually the scale moves down, but with this female stuff....I guess I should be thankful that I am 140 and not 240, but it is still scary and frustrating. I have been on Doxycycline for the acne I have had on my body and using Benziclins on my face and neck, seems to be clearing up finally!
May 12, 2004
I can't believe how quickly this last month has gone! I had a terrific 34th birthday, I couldn't believe how much my co-workers showed me their appreciation. I got flowers, gifts, cake and lots of cards. I felt so loved! I did go up a few pounds in the last few weeks after losing a few. I think a lot of it has to do with lack of exercise. I have not been to the gym since my play started--which is going great by the way! Once it is over (two weeks) I plan to get back in my routine. My boy friend has also gained weight (you know how it is when you start going out with someone, eating out...munching) so he is also ready to get back in shape. I am still a size 4 petite, but feels tight. I weighed 138.5 this morning, amazing how 5 little pounds can upset me so much. I also noticed I am having trouble with sugar, not sure if it is dumping or I am getting diabetic, but I notice after sugar I get light headed and feel like I might pass out, very scary.
May 25, 2004
The play is over and I plan to get back to the gym this week. Kelly is recovering from varicose vein removal so she can do things like swimming...maybe water aerobics.I am still bopping between 138 and 140, I know going to the gym will help, as I have completely cut out sugar and too much snacking. I have to do bloodwork in the morning, I might be diabetic or anemic, I guess I'll know more soon. Work has been particularly strange, possible promotion in a completely different department, trying to keep stress eating in check. My upper arms look horrible from lack of exercise, they were finally getting toned and I had to go and stop my gym routine. Duh!
June 10, 2004
Well, still struggling with getting myself into the gym. Still floating in the upper 130's and low 140's. I have to remind myself that I am in a much better place than I was two years ago, but I also have to be cautious of what is going on with my weight, as it could easily creep up again. I am terrified of failing this "diet" too! I figured the low carb thing is not working for me these days. I have been tracking my calories on fitday.com and cannot believe how much I am able to pack in during a day...a handful of nuts has an enormous amount of calories. I could eat 8 rice cakes and feel more satisfied! So now I am concentrating on just plain old healthy eating habits. Fresh fruit, veggies, salads, protein, etc...I still have not gotten back to the gym regularly. I went twice last week. I think trying to go after work is not realistic. I do better if I go in the mornings.
June 28, 2004
Blood work came back so great...the doctor said that I can plan on living to be 100 and I had no worries about ever having a heart attack. I am struggling with my weigth still, like ever really thought it wouldn't be a problem. I got up to 142.5 and I am still wearing a size 4 petite, but my boobs are a bit bigger (why complain?) Anyhow, I started working out during my lunch hour, figured it would save me money and calories, and then I don't have to get up early, or go after work. Seems to be working out well for me. I work out on the weights and then when I get home I work out on the treadmill. I can actually RUN. Yes, RUN. for the first time ever in my life! Woohooooo!
August 3, 2004
I am back at 142, floating between 139 and 142. Don't know why I am so disturbed by the weight, but I guess any weight gain is noticible when you are this small. I saw a friend I hadn't seen in a while for lunch the other day and she said she is considering the surgery too. I try not to pump it up as a "magic" cure for obesity, even now, over two years out from my surgery, I still have to be careful of how I eat and how often. If I were better about keeping consistent about exercise, I know that I would have my weight back down in the 130's. Don't know why I sabotage myself the way I do! Anyhow, we may be moving to Texas and if we do we plan to have a "work out room" so both my boyfriend and I can work out at home. My acne is still a problem, I am going in for my 3rd follow-up appointment on the anti-biotics. I notice that they help to an extent, but I am still breaking out alot, very frustrating.
August 10, 2004
Saw my parents for dinner last night and my mom said, "I am getting used to you being thin!" Wow. I am having my second period in a month. I am wondering if I should just go back on birth control. My dermatologist doubled my antibiotics and gave me a retin-a product for my face. Seems to be working better than what I have been using anyhow. The ex-husband reared his ugly head again yesterday and I resorted to stress eating, up a pound this morning as a result, and probably because of my period again.
September 1, 2004
Well, I had a very distressing and depressing moment two nights ago. I had to shop for larger jeans and a larger bra. I was up to 145 again, and my size 4 petites were straining, and my boobs were popping out of my bra. It is amazing what 10 pounds or so can do to a smaller person versus gaining that much at 245 pounds. Size 6 petites are tight and 36D bra from a 34 C. Damn! Well, it scared me enough to try and be more careful the last few days and sure enough I have dropped down to 142. Let's just say that lack of exercise and snacking at night are getting me down. I finally got my divorce paperwork completed, lets just hope the courts find it complete and finish it all up! Its been a long, difficult year, but if I only gained 10 pounds through it all, I guess I don't have a lot to complain about. Oh...awesome news too, my boyfriend and I got engaged on August 19th! Amazing how things kind of happen so fast, but it doesn't feel like rushing at all. We haven't even been dating for a year yet, but I know this is the reason that I needed to leave Rob. This is the first relationship in my entire life where I feel blessed and happy every single day! I am also going to be adopting his two wonderful children, Mitchell and Christopher. Their mother passed away soon after the little one was born (almost 6 years ago)and I am happy to accept and take on the role of a mother for the first time in my life (to children that is. Haha!) Life does go on, and life does change a lot after a surgery like this, perhaps because I finally feel comfortable with who I am inside AND out.
September 2,2004
Happy to say I am holding at 142, seems if I cut out the evening snacks and sweets, I can see the scale move in the right direction. I have made a drastic decision. I am going to have a tummy tuck, breast lift/augmentation, leg lift and arm tuck. At least that's what I feel like doing right now, we'll see after I have a consultation with a good surgeon. I think I'll wait until I get to Dallas and go with a good hospital and doctor in the area. I think 10 pounds I am holding is probably just loose skin. I have been watching a lot of TLC on TV and feel that the results are really awesome of these surgeries. I am happy with myself for the most part, but feel I could look even better, and enjoy my new figure more if I didn't have to cover up my upper arms and thighs and tummy all the time! My fiance is very supportive of the idea. If I sell my motorcycle, I am going to use the cash to buy my procedures (assuming BC doesn't cover it). I am researching the procedures right now.
September 3, 2004
Down to 141.5 today, looks like I may be back in business! Yeah! I feel so much better already, only 2 pounds to get below 140 again, and then only 4 pounds to the 135 mark. Then I'll start looking for a wedding dress. Yipee!
September 7, 2004
Down to 141 and having yet another period. Finally got to the gynocologist and she said that I have a small cyst on an ovary (did an ultra sound) and thinks that and the weightloss + getting off the depro is causing the excessive periods and the acne...so they are putting me on an oral contraceptive to try and regulate everything. I hope it is that simple of an answer! My acne is not improving (much) and the repeated periods are getting to be a bore. I hope I do well on this pill. Keep you updated.
September 9, 2004
Doing even better today, been on my new pill for three days, period stopped! Yeah! I also notice my appetite has subsided. Hormones, what a pain. If only I would get off my A** and exercise. I would melt away 5 pounds right there. I bought my wedding dress yesterday, a size 6...but I need to take it in, so still a size 4. I never thought I'd be able to wear something so fitted and pretty. I felt like a shlump at both of my previous marriages, for once I'll feel glamorous! Yeah! Bad dreams about Rob last night, hope I forget them by day's end. I keep thinking he's coming to get me. Ugh. Glad I am moving to another state soon.
October 4, 2004
My weight is back to 142, I am trying to eat sensibly..went to the store and stocked up on low cal stuff. I have been eating apples like they are going out of style. I would like to get down to at least 135 again...my size 4's are too snug at 142. My move out of state has been postphoned. Oh well. Still pretty happy with my new honey and my new life. Amazing how much has changed in a year.
October 8, 2004
Still at 142, but clothes are a little looser. I'll be darned. Anyhow, sticking with my lo-cal snacks and tracking on fitday, seems to be helping quite a bit! I am feeling better, more energetic and better about myself in general. The other night I was by myself (my honey decided to stay home with his kids) and I took the time to really take a look at myself in the mirror. I have been really down on myself for gaining approximately 10 pounds in the last year...but when I finally took as objective of a look as I could in the mirror, I realized, I look very good, I look normal, and yes, with the risk of sounding conceited, I look pretty! Finally, my eyes/brain have caught up with my actually body. Every since then, I have been feeling very good about myself. Oddly enough, ever since then, I am getting hit on more than usual. I guess I put out a different vibe when I am feeling good about myself. Lesson learned.
November 15, 2004
Still hanging in at 142...at least I am not gaining anymore weight. Alot going on in my life. Lack of exercise and eating poorly sometimes...don't know why I punish myself so. Lost my job, have an interview today (third one) so hopefully all will turn out well.
November 22, 2004
Still working on the job application, very extensive background search. They go back 10 years, so I am having to dredge up some painful and unpleasant memories...hope I still get the job. My weight is doing well, noticing my appetite is less now that I am not stressing out at work all the time. I have been on Accutane for about a month, and my skin looks so much better. I don't have my back all cleared up yet, but my face looks terrific.
December 28, 2004
I am finally working again and very happy with my new job. I have been bringing lunch, and with the exception of all the holiday fare, I have done well with my weight and eating. I plan to get back to exercising soon...I have no excuse, and I am getting so flabby! Ugh! Seriously thinking of having plastic surgery when I get vacation time. I would love to have a tummy tuck, leg lift and boob job. We'll see how my finances pan out over the next year. I plan to get money back into savings and start moving towards my goals. I figure if they remove the extra skin on my tummy and legs, that would probably drop me 5 more pounds. I am pretty tiny, wearing a size 4 or 6 depending on the make, but still feel my legs look horrible. One of my boyfriend's good friends had the surgery yesterday, I am anxious to see how he is doing. Two of my former work mates are in process of having the same surgery, I am very excited for them!
January 11, 2005
My friends both got approved for the surgery, they are going to a doctor in Bakersfield. Liza called me last night excited and nervous. I am glad I am able to help her feel more at ease, and informed! I can't wait to see how beautiful and wonderful they both will look and feel down the road. I pray that they get through it well and have a speedy recovery.
The friend that had his surgery in December is doing well. He had Dr.Boone and said that he is feeling great. My boyfriend saw him and said he is looking good.
I had my weight going down again, and now I am up a few pounds again. I guess in perspective, I should be happy I have stayed within the same 5-10 pound range, but I still never did make it to my goal of 125.
I am at my new job, and it is not bad, but I had an epiphany about two weeks ago and decided it was time to pursue my life long love of the theater. So I am auditioning next month to get into the local conservatory and I am so excited! I have to perform two monologues, one classical and one modern and sing part of a song. If I make that cut, I guess there is a second call in March and I have to audition again. Wow! I have to say, losing the weight has definitely given me more confidence to follow my dreams, and more versatility in the roles I can play in theater.
I am currently in a production where I play a vampy Cruella de Ville type of character, a far stretch from my usual bumbling character roles! I think it is going to be a terrific show.
January 19, 2005
My weight was going down, then, ZOOM, up again. I am holding about 144, but really feel the need to drop at least 10 pounds. I have been pretty good about bringing healthy food to work, again, I think exercise and cutting back on the night time eating will help. We cannot snack during the show, so I am hoping that will help me shed some pounds. I am drinking more water too, so that will help. I just realized I still have a before picture of me and Rob in here, I need to find one with out him in it. Makes me sick to even look at him anymore. What a PIG!
January 25, 2005
I have been eating like a MUTHA but I think a lot is period stuff (perhaps the sudden bump up in weight?) The play and stress are making me eat more than I should. I am so glad that the director said we aren't allowed to have snacks back stage anymore. I definitely would like to lose 10 pounds before the summer. I feel so flabby and gross, exercise will be the next move. My boyfriend has been trying to drop weight too and wanted to get a Bowflex, I am not in a financial position to get one right now, but if he would be open to me cancelling the satellite on my TV (which would save me $40 a month)then we could get a Bowflex and spend the time we would normally be vegging out in front of the boob tube actually doing something constructive! If I get into the local theatrical conservatory, I will be on such a busy scheduel, which will include dancing lessons at least 3 times a week, I don't see how I couldn't drop a few pounds!
February 2, 2005
Well, I am back down to 141 and feeling more confident. I have figured out that snacking at night and eating a big dinner is contributing to my problems with my weight. So the last few days I have tried to eat lightly and nothing for snacks at night but light things like fruit or popcorn, and VOILA! Down to 141. Maybe I can get below 140 by the end of the week! Opening night tonight for the show, I am very excited! We have a picture in the Sun newspaper and hopefully will have a write-up by the end of the week. I have my big audition for PCPA Theaterfest on Sunday, I am so excited I can barely think.
2/9/05
Been in a hormonal funk. The birth control pills I am taking to help with my acne are making me a PMS bitch. I hate that feeling. I did well on my audition, but didn't make it in. Sent me into my old crappy way of thinking and I can't seem to get away from it. Looking at this site reminds me of how far I have come. My weight was up a bit again this week, I am sure water weight as I have not been eating much. The show is going well, the first review comes out tomorrow, we'll see how that goes.
2/16/05
Alot has happened. The reviews for the show were terrific, though I was barely mentioned in one review, I had three paragraphs and a huge paper in the local paper for the other one! It definitely cheered me right up. I have been having a period for almost a week now and I am on the pill--so this is not when I am supposed to be having one..the only positive of it all is my weight is up slightly (143) but I am bloated, so I would guess I'll be down to 40 by the time my period is over. My fiance is supposed to get a Bowflex soon, I need to get back to exercising, I really want to get to my goal of 125!!!
2/24/05
I think until I start exercising again, I might as well get over trying to drop 10+ pounds. I have been tracking my calories diligently on fitday.com and I am coming in at around 1500 cals a day, which according to the standards of several sites and references I looked up, is 300 cals less than someone my size should be eating...GRRR Anyhow, so much is going on right now, this is the last weekend of the play and I must say I am glad that it is over, but will miss some of my cast members. The next show didn't feel right to me, so I didn't bother to audition. However, I did come up with a new business idea, actually, it isn't "new" but it would be to the area I live in, and of course I'll add my own special touches. Since I didn't get into PCPA, I figured that it wouldn't hurt me to find a way to do what I love and earn money doing it. This thought has given birth to Miss Molly's Musical Messengers, Tuneful Telegrams and Comedic Couriers...more on this later. I am bored to death at work and find it is causing me to munch mindlessly, luckily I come stocked with low fat veggies, fruit and snacks like pretzels, yogurt and Teddy Grahams (for those chocolate urges). I know, a lot of carbs, but I found after a while the low carb thing was actually causing me to gain weight. 144 this morning. :-(
March 2, 2005
I just read a profile of one of the fellow AMOS members and it really inspired me to put more effort towards my health! I mean, I didn't go through this surgery and all the changes that have gone with it to go back to being fat and frumpy! She looks amazing, but she has also worked at it daily. I need to drink more water, be better about my supplements, eat higher quality foods, EXERCISE and get more sleep. I am inspired. Dusting off the old treadmill tonight and giving it my all, it's time! I weighed in at 145 this morning and I can say that it truly upset me, I barely ate anything yesterday and have been very good today. I even staved off a candy urge by having a non-fat sugar free yogurt. I have an orange if the urge hits again. I keep a journal at home on a more regular basis than the journal here, and I noticed something very profound. I spend so much of my time getting everyone else's approval that I am not taking care of my own needs and self-care. I worry about people that don't give a hoot about me, while the people that do often suffer the consequences of my crappy attitude. I also realized that by not being more "selfish" for want of a better word, I deny myself the happiness I deserve and it's almost akin to lying in the sense that I am not being my true self by comprimising. Anyhow, enough of that rant, at least I am getting the conviction to start making significant changes in my life again.
March 16, 2005
Still struggling to keep my weight down, I have been non-stop munching since my job has become so boring. I do well if I bring things like carrot sticks and snap peas to munch on, but will start eating crap if I run out! Ahhhh! Still not exercising, but really can see the flabbiness, I need to take my dog on more evening walks (he's fat too!) I know the vet is going to ream me on that when I take him in on Friday. Getting ready to move, start my new business venture and get married-AGAIN! Three's a charm! I hope. Weighing in at 144.5 today.
March 23, 2005
My best friend Heidi has lost 30 pounds using Weight Watchers and going to Curves. I could really tell when I saw her last night, I am so proud of her! I need to lose about that much (or at least 1/2) and its so funny how hard it is to lose those few pounds. I know so much is due to not exercising at the risk of sounding repetitive. However, I have really been careful with my portions and trying to eat slower and it seems to help. I was at 144 this morning, but that is with a full-blown period, so I am probably closer to 141, I just want to get back to the low 130's so my cute clothes will fit properly again! ICK.
March 30, 2005
I heard from my friend Liza last night, she sounds great, I am so relieved that she is doing well. She has already lost 22 pounds, ahhh, I remember the honeymoon phase where the weight just droppped off...Blanca, our other friend, had hers open on Monday, and I guess she isn't doing as well, I hope she recovers quickly and feels like new again soon. My weight shot up to 147 this week, but back to 144.5 this morning. I can't wait to get our Bowflex and start working on toning up again. Randy and I talked about me having plastic surgery (tummy tuck, breast 'refill' if you will and thigh lift). I think it would also help out in my business. We got a new Hog and will be riding this weekend, I am so excited! Yeah!
March 31, 2005
I forgot to mention I ran into an old friend from highschool (and college) and she didn't recognize me, and ironically, I didn't recognize her either. She had gained quite a bit of weight and I had lost so much weight...but when I heard her voice I knew it was her! We have been e-mailing since I saw her and she was very happy for me and my weight loss, my heart went out to her on the weight gain she had. Anyhow, yesterday rode the new Road King with my husband-to-be and my chaps were pretty darn snug, I felt like a leather sausage! I am still around 145 and getting very frustrated and want to drop 10 measely pounds so that I can wear some of my other clothes. I will find a way, I am getting to that point...
April 5, 2005
Randy and I bought a Bowflex, I am really looking forward to toning up. I danced around last night in my bedroom in front of a mirror (because I am working on a routine for my new musical messenger/singing telegram business) and my boobs were almost to my waistline...my butt jiggled, my upper arms flapped...definitely ready to get to work! I worked up quite a sweat, but it felt good, the first real exercise I have had in a long while. We also have a treadmill and my friend is selling me her elliptical trainer for a small price, so I will have a full gym. I am going in for consult to have tummy tuck and breast augmentation in May, I am really looking forward to that, but hate the idea of scars and more surgery. However, I know that no matter what I do, I can't get rid of this loose skin..so time to trim it away.
April 12, 2005
Yes, I have been stress eating. I went to Las Vegas over the weekend with my honey for a costume convention, this was to help get supplies for my singing telegram business. We had a great time, but now that I am back, I notice as I order things for my business, I get "munchy." I hate spending money on things sometimes, makes me nervous. I got a call back from Dr. Stokes in Santa Barbara about having a consult about breast augmentation /tummy tuck surgery, I hope I am able to do it sooner than later so I am not all bungled up this summer.
May 17, 2005
On the go non-stop ever since I moved in with Randy and started being a full time "Step-Mom." Sometimes I am over eating and other times I forget to eat. So far my weight has maintained. Randy and I got the Bowflex and cross trainer, but no room until I put the rest of my crap away. I painted the entire living room with my best friend today and it was quite a chore but I was satisfied with my handiwork. Going on Thursday to Bakersfield for a consul with Dr. Mitts and then next Tuesday to meet with Dr. Stokes about the tummy tuck and breast augmentation.
May 27, 2005
I had both consults and decided to go with Dr. Mitts, however I had to postphone the surgery due to my Accutane use. I guess it inhibits scarring/healing in the skin if you have surgery before 6 months to a year of ending treatment! Glad I mentioned it to Dr. Stokes, even though I decided not to go with him for the surgery. My mom was told about it today and I was so surprised that she was so supportive. I am glad she was positive about it, a great weight off my mind. By this fall I should have perky tits and a flat tummy!
June 23, 2005
Got married on June 2,2005 and couldn't be more happy! I have two little boys now (12 and 6) and am working on shaping up our house out here in the country. Unfortunately, this last weekend my new husband and I were in a motorcycle wreck, but the good news is we are both in pretty good shape considering what happened. A dog ran head on into our bike less than a mile from our house! Anyhow, road rash and soreness, but no broken bones. We just hope to get our bike back and running again so
