Mocha357

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 Well I have made it to month 7 and the only thing that has really bothered me is losing hair.  I have been very blessed and have not thrown up since December (thank God),  I have noticed that it is extremely hard for me to only eat three times a day with no snacks.  So I snack on heathy things like strawberries, and string cheese, or have a protein shake.  I have eaten things that may not be the best choice but I don't let it take control of me.  I get my taste and leave it at that and focus on being healthy.  I have managed to stick to an exercise routine of 4 times per week and I can't believe it.  I never was so regular about it, but if I don't I feel like I am going to go back to the morbidly obese me.  I am still battling with the mind games and the endless amounts of water that I should consume.  My doctor's office told me that I was doing so well and asked me to represent them when needed.  This made me feel awesome and is a great source of motivation for me to continue making positive choices. So until next time !

 March 3rd will officially be month 4 and I am very satisfied with my journey up to this point.  I have not been sick or thrown up since December.  I am hoping that I got all the drama out of the way in the first 2 months!  My remaining food restrictions will be lifted and I am so excited to have more options.  It is interesting how my views about food have changed so much.  I have to say I thought I would die about 2 months ago if I did not get pizza, but time does help because I rarely think about it anymore.  It is really strange to see the difference in how people approach you.  I was shopping in Dillard's one day and about 5 different sales people offered to go above and beyond what I ever got before.  It makes me slightly angry that people are so shallow.  People make fat comments about others around me now and it is crazy!  I guess you never really know who people really are until they truly show themselves. 

            Well, I have come to the point where I am at a stall.  I have been at the same number for about a week and I also have gained about 1 pound in the last two days.  I tell myself that I will not freak out , but of course I do just a little bit.  My husband says don't worry because I have to consider the fact that I started working with weights and running this past week.  Plus I was on liquids and soft proteins for so long that now that I can eat regular foods (except starches and breads) that my body is working it all out. I know this is a ridiculous thought but I keep thinking that I am going to stop losing and gain everything back.  I do get inspiration from all the knowledge shared, so for that I thank you.  Lord, Help me through this!

 Oh where do I start?  Well, the surgery went very well.  The nurses told me that I should be just great because I am young and fairly healthy.  They said that I was doing better than everyone on the floor. Apparently, that was the kiss of death.  I had the hardest time when I got home.  No matter what I did i could not get the water down.  I felt so full with soooo much gas all the time.  I also developed diarrhea that would not go away. The nurses said, "Oh, that is normal" so I just let it be.  When I went to my one week appointment I felt horrible and that night I had to go to the ER for dehydration.  they found out that I had gotten the infection from the surgery antibiotics that most people don't get.  They gave me more antibiotics for that, which is not unusual but, it was these big old horse pills that I would never be able to swallow.  I had to crush them up three times a day and take them mixed with water. It was by far the worst taste I have ever had.  It did work but during this time I developed swelling so I had to go from soft protiens to clear liquids for three days. Next I of course got a yeast infection from the antibiotics, and my OBGYN said, "Most people don't get a yeast infection from these antibiotics".  I am coming to find that I am not most people.  So I started to go on these frothing vomiting cycles for hours on end, and once the water didn't stay in I asked the nurse if that was normal.  She tells me its not and calls me the next morning to say it might be a stricture and someone is working on scheduling the procedure to fix it.  This was on a Monday. I play phone tag with the person responsible because he never is available when I return the call so I hear nothing until I call back on Wednesday.  He says he will deal with it, but later I get a message saying I need to call a number and schedule it myself.  So I schedule it for Friday.  Everything went very well and i have to say I have been doing much better.  The scope opened it up from 3mm to 12mm and I have not thrown up since.  What  a difference!  I just had to get over the anxiety of eating because I was so used to getting sick during or after, that is not easy to do.  Now my biggest goal is to get this da@# water down.  Man it feels impossible, but I will never give up!