NewDayDawning
Four Months and Frustrated
Oct 16, 2009
Do you sense a whine coming on from the title of this blog post?This past month I have lost a grand total of 4 pounds. I have worked out, eaten what I am supposed to.. and lost four pounds.
I am seeing changes in my body and the way clothes fit, but not huge numbers on the tape measure. How is that possible? How do you go from a 22 to an 18W when you only lose 4 pounds?
It seems the hardest part of this process for me is still not comparing myself to others. Realizing that MY journey is just that, MY journey - is hard to keep in perspective.
If you would have told me before the surgery that at 4 months I would be down 51 pounds and 51 inches, I would have thought "Right on! That would be fucking awesome!" Now here I am and I find myself worrying - "Other people have lost 70-100 pounds by now.. Your'e doing it wrong.. You're gonna screw this up too." I'm worried that this might be it.. what if I don't lose any more.. I see others posting that they are worried about the same thing, but what if I really AM the one exception to the rule..
So trying to focus on the positive for amoment :
This past month I took a ride on an airplane and fit in the seat with no problem.. I had about 5 inches of seatbelt to spare, which felt REALLY good.
I was able to hike around the foothills of a mountain with no problems and actually enjoyed it.
I find myself looking in the mirror and liking what I see more and more.
I'm not so intimidated to go to the gym and the towells actually fit ALMOST all the way around me.. Big NSV (non scale victory)
Starting to be able to cross my leg over my knee and not have it take a monumental effort to keep it there... in another 50 I'll be crossing them ladylike. (looking forward to that)
So that is my update for now.. I promise to try to focus less on the scale and more on the journey.. It's the hardest thing I've ever done. This surgery is NOT the easy way out by any stretch of the imagination.
