Told That My Size Would Not Be Where The Plus Sizes Are

Aug 22, 2011

It's been awhile since I posted, but decided that I wanted to let y'all know about my NSV. I was in the store looking for a specific dress. I described it to the sales clerk, and asked if she knew if they might have any of this style in the plus sized section since I couldn't find it in the regular sizes. She took a quick look and said, you won't find your size back there. I tried to get her to direct me there anyway. She said, if you're lucky you might find a 1X, but your size is going to be up here. I'm currently wearing a 14. I caught myself trying to explain that  I could wear Plus Sizes, when I remembered that actually I don't anymore. Boy was I grinning from ear to ear.  Lol. 

Just wanted to share.

Loud Cheers,
Alnita



  
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NSV--Just Joined My Daily Plate After Several Failed Attempts

May 29, 2011

I had RNY January 7, 2011, and have not really been doing a good job with tracking. OK, I haven't been tracking. I went to the NC WLS Meetup support group (which I think is one of the most empowering support groups) this past weekend and after a long and encouraging conversation with our group leader Barbara and Maggie, I promised that I would join mydailyplate by today.

Now this is probably going to sound crazy. I've gone to the site many times to join, but couldn't figure out what I wanted my user name to be, so I left. Got a little farther, the next time, but couldn't figure out what I wanted my password to be, so I didn't join. Barbara said, it wasn't really about the user name or password, and I think she was right. It's not like I haven't been working out, because I have. I've also been loosely tracking in my head, but this is my attempt to put on paper so to speak.

So, with my heart beating a little faster, I filled out the whole thing and hit submit or join or whatever it was. I even tracked the first thing that I ate this morning--watermelon. It's actually super easy to lose, and Barbara kept reminding me, that it's not for anyone elses eyes. It's for me and also helps to reinforce the positive habits that we need to make the best use of our tool.

So, if anyone has gone there and had the same issues that I did. Fill out the very short registration (including selecting your user name and password which can be as simple as your initials and the day you had surgery), take a deep breath, and hit submit. This is not the only tracking site (mydailyplate/livestrong), it just happens to be what I've chosen after Barbara said you can track not only what you ate, but also portion sizes (i.e. half or a fourth). But, find something that works for you.

At the bare minimum, you will finally get this to do off of your plate and onto my daily plate, but it's a great opportunity to get a true picture of how much you're really eating/exercising/ or drinking your water.

See Barbara, I really did it!

Off to track more stuff so I can make the most of my tool!

Cheers,
Alnita

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Embracing the Good

Feb 26, 2011

 
 
If several people who have never met consistently say the same things about you, especially if they're positive, there's a strong possibility that at least one of them is right. It's important to learn how to embrace the good that people say about us as easily as we embrace the bad that people say about us. Hope your day is as fabulous as you are!

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Valentines-What Better Day to Start A Love Affair With Yourself

Feb 14, 2011

Today is Valentine’s Day. What better day to start a lifelong love affair with yourself. I believe that you have to look in the mirror and learn to love the person that’s staring back at you. Yup, flabby skin, stretch marks, knocked knees, short legs, thunder thighs, oompa loopas, gray hair, and anything else you can think of. We so often give everyone else unconditional love. But, one of the people that deserve that unconditional love the most  is ourselves. It’s definitely time for you to cut yourself some slack or at least be as encouraging of ourselves as we are of others.

So yeah, look yourself in the mirror and give yourself a great big ole hug!

You’re beautiful and more than that, you deserve it.

Loving all of me,
Alnita

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One Month Anniversary

Feb 07, 2011

Hard to believe it's officially been a month.
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Off Limit Bites Way Too Soon

Jan 25, 2011

I'm definitely guilty of taking off limit bites way too soon. I didn't even spit it out. I think on top of having the craving, I wanted to see if I dumped. So far, I don't think I do. I was supposed to be on pureed this week, but have kind of combined that and soft foods, since I was on the road this past weekend. I guess after seeing so many people starting different stages sooner, I felt it might be OK. Luckily, I don't think I did any damage. So, I'm definitely not encouraging anyone to do that. You/I should really follow our surgeon's instsructions. I'm just having a very honest moment here.

Cheers,
Alnita
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First Post OP Visit--2 Week Follow Up With Thanks--Long

Jan 20, 2011

Hi,
I had my first two week post-op visit with Dr. Enochs yesterday. It went well. He said that my incisions are healing well, and are almost gone. Moderate activity, but he said that I needed to wait at least four weeks before going back to my dance classes. He said that I could try walking on the tread mill or even attempt the recumbent bike, but I think I'm just going to wait. Lord knows, I've taken more than a few weeks off from working out over the course of my lifetime.

I weighed in at 286 pounds. (His scale is 3 pounds lighter than mine.) If you go from the 308 pounds of my last office visit, I've lost 22 pounds. If you go from the 303, that I weighed when I went to the hospital, I've lost 17 pounds, but if you go from 316 pounds  I weighed when I left the hospital (I had a 13 pound fluid gain), Then, I've lost 30 pounds in the last two weeks. My daughter said that it doesn't matter that it was water weight, I still had to lose it. So I should go from the high weight. lol. He said that I could expect lose anywhere between 25 and 30 in the first month. So, it looks like I'm right on track. I guess the most important thing is I'm losing.

I told him I don't know if it's because he's a super star surgeon or what, but my recovery has gone a whole lot better than I expected it to. And, I told him, thanks. He said that the patient's attitude helps a lot and thanked me. The rest of my follow ups are scheduled with the PA. I was assured that I could get in and out of his office quicker. But, I wanted my first follow up to be with Dr. Enochs himself. I wanted to personally thank the man  who has helped to give me a do over button if you will. This time, I'm hoping to make better choices along the way. I've had waaayyyyyy too much of the good stuff already. Does this mean I won't ever enjoy it again, probably not. So far, I haven't dumped or thrown up for that matter. It just means that I've been given a second opportunity to try to get it right. And, just like life, with all of it's bumps and bruises, I'm sure that I will have some missteps along the way. I'll just have to pick up the pieces and keep going.

I don't expect this to be a magic wand. There are far worse things than being overweight. I've never hated being me because I understand that I am not my fat, and my fat is not me. And, I've learned to not let other people's opinions define who I am. Jermaine Dupri told Janet Jackson during one of her heavy periods that all of her deserved to be loved and that her jelly rolls needed love too. I agree with that. 

When asked have you gotten skinny yet? I reply, "Nope, not trying to get skinny, I'm trying to get healthy."  Now if skinny, happens to be a by-product of that, then so be it. I realize at the beginning of this new journey, and on the end of the old one, you have to make peace with who you are and where you're at. If you don't you'll always be looking forward to being something you're currently not, without having the added benefit of enjoying whoever you currently are.

So, thanks Dr. Enochs, thanks to my wonderful babies who helped nurse me through this, thanks to my surgery posse, thanks to my friends including those that have been through WLS that stopped by to check on me and make sure I was getting my protein, but also thanks to each of you (and to members of the NC WLS meetup) who have offered encouraging words even when they were not specifically directed at me.

I think it's wonderful how we each pitch in to be the wind beneath someone elses wings. Sometimes it's a kind word, sometimes it's a swift kick in the you know what. But, ultimately isn't that what this journey is about--hope, health, and healing.

Here's to wishing us all lots of mini victories and several major ones along with self acceptance as we continue this journey to our new selves.

All best,
Alnita

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Why the Last Supper Syndrome Might Not Be The Best Thing For U

Jan 15, 2011

I did the last supper over and over again. To the tune of putting on 11 extra pounds over the three months before my pre-op. My surgeon was not too happy. He explained that the liver is the first place to lose fat and the first place to gain it. He said the weight of the person was not as important as the direction of the weight (either gaining or losing). He said if he got in there and found that my liver was too big to get out of the way that he might have to wake me up without doing the surgery. That right there was enough to scare the bejesus out of me. I thought about how I would feel if I went through everything to have nothing happen. Needless to say, I committed myself to following is high protein, low carb suggestion, and the liquid diet the night before, but not before losing 6 of the 11 pounds and having a rib eye and ribs.

I realize that there are things that I may never eat again, but there are new things that I'm sure I'll enjoy. Besides, I think my 303 pound body, affirms the fact that I've had more than enough of the foods that I love or thought I can't live without. The truth of the matter if I kept going like I was, I might not have been able to continue to live with them.

But when you do have your meal of choice, make sure you really enjoy it.

Best of luck,
Alnita
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Not Happy Beacause I'm Fat or Skinny...Happy Because I'm Me

Jan 15, 2011

This is in response to people who think it's rude or are embarassed when someone asks them their weight.

I've always thrown my weight at people. I was very proud to be as heavy as I was (near or + 300 pounds) and doing the things that I did. I went to the gym. I took tap and ballet, and even did the ballet recital last year. Now understand, I'm no prima, but I feel just because you're heavy, doesn't mean that you're not entitled to living a full and happy life.

Being heavier, doesn't make you less than. So, I proudly put all of jiggles, jelly, and rolls into my ballet costume. And, when people would come up to me and said I did such a good job, there's no way that they could do it. I always said, I'm 300+. If I can do it, you can do it. Now mind you, a lot of times these were skinnier women. I just chose to use it as a point of inspiration. I'm sure there are some people who thought what is her big azz doing up there, but that's their problem not mine. And, when I get smaller, there might be some people who say what is her old azz doing up there. Shoot if I were younger, they might say what is she doing up there. I don't care. To me, I am not my weight (whether heavier or lighter), I am me. There are always going to be people who like or dislike you based on your size. One guy actually told me that if he had met me under normal circumstances he would not have been attracted to me because I wasn't big enough. Now mind you, presurgery, I weighed over 300 pounds. Go figure. I actually find that people for the most part tend to be shocked, surprised, and supportive when I tell them my weight. Some people are just mean, so sometimes you have to get away from toxic people. I did. I do.

And, I don't think having fun and living life should be restricted to the young or the skinny. Until it changes, I am whatever size or weight I am. BTW I'm 41. You always have the option to not answer. But, I sing it loud and proud because I've never been ashamed of being who I am not matter what size body it was clothed in. I just consider it my small part in debunking the you're too fat to whatever myth. Because nobody, no matter how fat, how old, or how skinny is ever too much of any of these things to not be entitled to living a happy and fulfilled life.

But if by chance you are embarassed or find it rude when someone asks you your weight, you don't have to spend a lot of time being offended. I personally find that a waste of energy. You can simply choose not to answer.

A fat-happy 41 year old, starting at 306  pounds me,
Alnita
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One Week Post Op and Feeling Great

Jan 14, 2011

I had my surgery on 1/7/11, and I'm shocked that I feel a whole lot better than I expected. I did a lot of working out, right before surgery mainly cardio, but weights and cardio for nearly a year before. I know I've had surgery before without doing the workouts and had that hit by a mack truck feeling. I don't know if the working out is why, but whatever the reason, thank God.

The biggest problem that I had initially was being extremely thirsty and not being able to tolerate the broth or Isopure anymore. I just focused on drinking water. Now I'm on full liquids, and things are going great. I hope things continue like this.

Cheers,
Alnita
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