A New Beginning

Mar 17, 2010

Don't know what day, or even what week it is, of this journey.  Does it really matter, anyway?  Isn't every single day a new beginning?  Like I said in the beginning of this thing...every single day is the first day of the rest of your life.  Right about now, I'm feeling the truth in that statement.  I HAVE to  make myself realize that it's okay to slip, and it's okay to fall...as long as I get right back up, and start again.  Sometimes I might have to backtrack, and that's okay, too.  Just have to keep my sights straight ahead and keep pointed in the right direction.
This sickness got me down...BIG TIME.  I actually, literally, thought I was going to die--not just once, but, SEVERAL times.  I went to bed one night, not knowing whether I would wake up the next morning.  To tell the truth, I was not really caring, either.  The trip to the hospital re-fired me, momentarily, but, I didn't come back here to tell about it, and I lost it.
Well, now I'm back (Gloria Gaynor, anyone?).  I'm going to re-dedicate myself to this journey.  Yesterday and last night, I worked on a vision board, that was suggested to me by my best friend Keithie.  It was an awesome idea.  As I worked on it, I was thinking about things...envisioning things...wishing for things.  I was, in essence, getting back down to the nitty gritty.
These are the things I want...
I want to be healthy
I want to be independant
I want to be able to travel
I want to be happy
I want to be able to walk
I want to be able to swim
I want to be proud of myself
I want to hold my head up
I want to accomplish things
I want to meet my goals
I want to be able to ride horses again
I want to be by the beach
I want to be able to travel and see my friends, all over the country
I want to go on a cruise
I want a house of my own
I want fluffy, softness all around
I want love
These are just a few...off the top of my head...off the top of my heart.
I'm tired of being tied down.  I want to do what I want to do, for a change.  So what's tying me down?  Well, I blame a lot on the kids, but, it's not all them.  It's not even all money.  It's not even all health.  It's WEIGHT.  I don't want to be putting myself out there for everyone when I'm like this.  I want to be better.  I want to look better.  I want to feel better.
I'm even afraid to travel because I'm afraid I'll be embarassed.  What if I need a belt extension?  What if I have to buy 2 seats?  I'd be mortified!
So........let's kick this thing back in gear.  Let's get this show back on the road.  Let's get this FAT OFF!!
Let's start with a couple of small goals:
more water
more movement
NO MORE SUGAR
that should do it, for now.
Once I conquer those, we'll add some more.
Going to weigh and measure now, to see where I'm starting out, again.
I'm hoping Keithie will blog soon, too, so I can get some boost from him, too.  I guess I'll have to get on him about that.  We'll see what I can do.
More later,
R.

0 Comments