my journey

Oct 18, 2013

My name is Christina and im 38 soon to be 39 next wed. ive been overweight since i was a child and my weight has been growing and growing. My weight escelated once my father died when i was 11 yrs old and my life wasnt the same since then. I was bullied during my teenage years and tried to live a nornal life as possible but I missed out on so many things and opportunities cause of my weight. I pretty much spent my teenage years bullied and depressed cause of my weight. Fast forward to college i wasnt bullied and was a sorority girl but becuase of my weight i didnt date much in high school or college and the guys who would have anything to do with me was usually the trashy douchebag type that would tell me anything i wanted to hear, abusive etc.I ended up giving up my college education over a abusive guy cause i felt cause of my weight i wasnt capeable of having anyone in my life that treated me good. I was  with this guy for 5 yrs and i had the guts to leave him. Then a yr later another guy came into my life. Everything was hunky dory till we got married then he felt like the world owed him something and he felt like he didnt have to work. Needless to say we spent our first wedding anniverary in a homeless shelter  and got kicked out cause he was accused of hitting on the women there. Well we did move and i got laid off from my job several yrs later and I got another job and went to school to better myself and come to find out he was cheating on me with a married neighbor lasted for a yr. I ended up moving to where i currently live to work as a pharmacy tech well the hubby had to follow me to my job he worked then he got fired due to no showing and we ended up in homeless shelters 2 more times and he was kicked out cause he refused to give his money to them for rent. While in the shelter i found out he was hanging out with some pretty rough people drugheads mainy. We moved into another place and found out he stole money from my bank account that was for the rent and went gambleing and that same time found out he was cheating on me with a prostitute. It didnt hit me until he picked me up from work with the prostitute in the car with him. Needless to say this guy is now my ex husband.   4 yrs later i met my current husband through a co worker of his which was a friend of mine. In 2009 we married and are still married. Because of my weight of course ive had health issues like high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, high cholesterol, asthma. In 2010 i had my first heart attack at age 35 and my heart condition was causing me difficulties in my job which people noticed. in 2012 I had open heart surgery and that is when things started really falling apart. Right before my heart surgery i found out my job that i had worked for 11 yrs were trying to find a way to get rid of me due to my medical issues well I was off for 4 mos. I rehabbed and right before i was scheduled to go back to work i went into congestive heart failure and had my 2 nd heart attack at age 38. It was at that time i was told I was terminated from my job. I was devistated as it wasnt my fault . Ive been on my weight loss surgery for several yrs and every time i ended up halfway through the process either i was in the hospital for something totally unrealted or i gave up. I started my weight loss journey after my heart surgery however once i lost my job i had to quit my journey for my weight loss surgery due to no insurance. And at that time my husbands insurance didnt cover weight loss surgery.So This yr i realized ill be turning 40 yrs old next  yr and ive missed out on my teen yrs, my 20s and most of my 30s cause of my weight and I want to live to be able to ride rollar coasters again, wear decent clothing and be happy for the first time in almost 40 years. i restarted my journey for surgery in july 2013 originally planning the gastric bypass. When i went to my cardiologist in aug she wanted me to do the lap band due to my heart history. this wasnt something i wanted due to the high failure rate of the band. So i had a discussion with my surgeon and he recommended the gastric sleeve and that is what i decided due to my mom and i have a friend that she was very successful with the sleeve and the fact i wouldnt have to go through the trouble of changing my medications around.  Its a constannt stuggle as im on this journey but i know it will be worth it in the end. See ya'll next month

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