spittman
2 months Post-OP Blaaah....
Aug 27, 2009
I have nothing to say. I have not lost anything in the past 4 weeks. I gained 5 pounds in 3 days and it took me 2 weeks to lose. I had a melt down at the beginning of the week because I had not lost weight. I guess I am nothing right now, no emotions because the meltdown was recent. If I would have seen this number 180 today for the first time. I would be upset.I feel like I spent my savings to lose 22 pounds and lower my cholesterol and A1C. Besides that I have nothing to show weight wise this month.
I am not upset I am just over this shit. Really done with it. I don't even care what I eat. I obsess about food now and before I didn't. I am constantly pissed because I get on the scale and the scale does not move. One minute I am glad I had surgery and another I question it. Lately questioning it more.
So I guess that I am sad not nothing. I am sad that after all this crap that I went through I am not seeing results. Yeah my labs are getting better but it is not something I see. It is in the inside not on the outside. On the outside all I have to show is 5 scars and huge bruises all over my body because now after surgery my skin is even more sensetive than before. I look like someone beats the shit out me in my arms and stomach from the insulin injections.
The part that upsets me most is that I had said I am getting WLS for the diabetes if I don't lose that much weight I am going to be fine. Well I am not losing that much weight and I am not fine. It pisses me off that my slow weight loss is getting me upset.
I took the advice from people in the forum I posted my meals, ate more drank more water, split my protein and nothing not even an ounce moved from the scale.
I am blah....maybe next month it will be better. I am seriously thinking of ending my blog days. I come here to track my weight loss, to track my food to see how everyone is doing but it is just getting harder.
The world outside OH does not understand that a 1 pound weight gain does havoc to your head. The oldies in OH have seen it and give you advice and some tell, "you did not gain the weight in two months" but I gained 35 pounds in two months. As soon as I was put on insulin. At least let me loose those.
I am disappointed. Maybe it is true what they said about my doctor she makes big sleeves. I am so screwed up that I am starting to believe those comments I heard when I was researching doctors. Well it is too late now. What is done is done and now I have don't have any money to go get a smaller sleeve or revision or what ever the possibilities maybe. I don't even have the money to get an x-ray to see how big or small this banana is.
So my 2 months update in nutshell. No weight loss and feel down.
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About Me
Reston, VA
Location
27.3
BMI
Surgery
06/29/2009
Surgery Date
Surgeon
Apr 23, 2009
Member Since
