My Journey
Oct 01, 2011
October 1, 2011I have been over weight for pretty much my whole life. There are some pictures of healthy weight toddler me but once I started school the weight gain began - freshmen 10? I had kindergarten 10!. By the time I was in elementary I was overweigh and the weight keep going on. In December 2009 I reached my highest weight of 325lbs and I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes - Merry Christmas. I decided I was taking my life back- my gall bladder came our in January and I was down 10 lbs - not bad considering I also went through Christmas! That June I also had reached 264 pounds - on my own steam. I felt great! Then I am not sure what happened - BBQ season, a few weddings, some good ol`Newfie celebrations with food, drinks and food. Also in June of 2011 I was diagnosed with a Fatty Liver - a bad case. And there is only one way to fix it - weight loss. If I don`t permanent damage could very possibly occur. And of course the only way to fix that - Transplant. Actually the doctor I have to thank for finding this is Dr. Pace - he found while he took my gall bladder! Though I did not understand the extent or the meaning of the fatty liver until I met with a specialist June 2010.
I don`t know what happened then - did that news scare me so much I jumped of the weight loss track, did it just simply demotivate me. I stopped the gym, food became my comfort again. But I am going to tell you something, and I think as I write this it is the first time I am saying it too myself. The gym and going for a walk does so much more to help you feel better. But I guess that is why we can`t stop eating when we do it for comfort - it does not help, we think it should, so we eat more. Hmmmm...I will have to keep reminding myself of this. Well before I knew it was September 2011 and I was back up to 307 lbs. When I realized that I had to stop! What in the world was I doing to myself??? Would it be weight watchers again, TOPS, what? I actually went back to a free iphone app that guided me through my big 2010 weight loss - Loseit! So now in less than two weeks I am down 9.2 lbs. It is a start.
Over the years I often thought of weight loss surgery but it seem so final so drastic. Then I though..well over 40% of people with type II diabetes will develop Chronic Kidney Disease...hmmmm. I already am facing a condition that could lead to liver failure if not taken in hand, blood pressure is going towards high normal... Kidney disease leads to dialysis leads to transplant. Do I really want another persons liver and kidneys. Ahhhh... NOOOO and I have the power to stop it! So I thought to myself...do you want to be drastic - at the rate I am going death by 40 is not that far out there. Retirement - Forget I would never make it. What is more drastic - being dead or being able to eat less. Eating less - is winning. I know I may sound like I am being over the top. But seriously - 36 with Type II and fatty liver problems. It not good people. It is not a path I want to be on. I am taking back my life and one of the tools I can do this with is VSG!
In early September I met with my family Doctor and she was very open to sending in a referral. Except for my husband she was the first person I spoke to about this. I was terrified to ask. For the first time in my life I was afraid of what a person's reaction was going to be. I usually do not care what people say or think. I pretty much go through life with the beating my own drum( in case your are wondering there is not a bit of rhythm to go with it
). Just a few days after my referral was sent in I had a call from Raleen Murphy the nursing practitioner for the new program here in Newfoundland. She seems wonderful. She explained the process and that because it is a new program and Dr. Pace is new to this particular surgery - lower risk (which means lower BMI's) would be done first. This makes complete and total sense to me! It will have better success rates to help the bariatric team advocate for continued and (dare I say) increased funding.
I am a little outside the range that is being done now. But I have a plan. By Dec 2 of this year (maybe a little sooner) I will be in the right range. Can I do this..for sure I have done it before. I have no trouble losing...I have trouble keeping it off and losing enough. This surgery is a tool, one I want and one I want to learn to use well. Maybe some of you are wondering why Dec 2??? Well..the lose it app that I mentioned tells me so. It tells me how many calories to I can eat, allows me to track my food (and even protein), and based on my plan to lose 2lbs a week - it told me I will be at goal by Dec 2. Now I am a big girl -so weight comes off faster at first..so maybe by sometime in November I will have that first 30 lbs gone.
A little earlier I mentioned that it was hard to tell people...so you start off with tests. I think you start with someone you know is going to say good for you. Go for it! That is what I did and it worked - I told a good friend of mine. She was great! Thanks N. Then I told my sister-in-law. It was another good move. Today I met Jenn. Who is also on the boards....it was a great experience. I have the opportunity to buy some fantastic and I mean FANTASTIC clothes that she has shrunk out of. Some fit now...and some I will shrink into. By the way Jenn...that black dress will be on me for my husbands Christmas dinner (loseit tells me so). I LOVE IT. Speaking with Jenn, even though it was brief, affirmed my decision. Then I decided I was going to tell Mom. Now this is the person I knew would be dead set against it. Who would say just lose weight the "old fashioned" way. But I had to get over this hurdle and move on and hope for gradual acceptance. Imagine my shock when she said "do what you need to do" and what type of surgery are you considering and what does it mean. So I told the basics I knew and that there are quite a few ahead of me. And she said keep losing weight to make it safer. Who is this woman and where is my Mother?!? God bless and shame on me for doubting her. I know she has always been over protective of me and it never occurred that she would see this the same way I do.
Anyway - right now I am eating low glycemic, plugging into Loseit and trying to move more. It is working. I am determined. I am taking back my life and my health. I am doing this for me. These are my baby steps. I know I will stumble and fall but I am hoping that I always remember to get back up again.
