Anne M.

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I have to have a dress for this honors thing I have Wednesday. I have been fortunate in having a friend hand over her clothes as she shrunk from the surgery. But, I want something new for this program and will go shopping tomorrow. I hate shopping for clothes and keep it still to a minimum.
So, I guess this is left over from all those years of dreading the fitting room. I fear that I will have to buy a dress size up from what I am wearing in shorts right now. I know it's not rational but it's the way my twisted mind works right now. Somehow, I beleive I am a fraud...how and why don't apply here.
Anyway, that's all from the irrational anxious woman. 

It's been a while since my last post. I went for my four month checkup and I have officially lost 63 pounds!!! I am so grateful for this surgery and the improvement in my health. 
Overall, I have gone from 5x to a 2x and almost into 1x. The last time I was that small was pre-Ryan which was 6 years ago. I am really excited about how I will look this summer when I see my parents. 
Well, that's all for now. I am just about finished with school for this semester and I have decided to major in Biology.

Wow, I can't believe how many weeks since I last updated this site.  Today, I officially start Spring Break. I can't wait to sleep in tomorrow. I guess I have pretty much gotten the hang of eating. I catch myself weighing the pros and cons of things I want to eat since I am trying to get in all my protein.
I had one of those baffling things happen that just explains how crazy the clothing industry is. I really wanted a pair of blue jean crops and bought a pair of 26/28 ones at Walmart. They didn't and still don't  fit. So, I got a little ticked since I have now lost a whole 51 pounds and 30 is hanging off of me. I decided to try Catherine's for a pair of shorts or capris because the weather is so lovely. To my amazement, I wear a 2X in Liz and Me and the chart says that is equivalent to a 22. Weird huh?  
Well, I hope everyone has a good weekend. I know I will!

Okay, don't get me wrong...I know we need the rain because we are in a drought. The lakes are looking more normal but I feel like I live in the Pacific Northwest.  When will the sun come out?
I have decided that Fitday is a lifesaver. I bought the program right after the surgery and it's helped me keep track of everything. Especially my nutrients, calories and protein intake daily. I am so glad I read the blogs and took the advice of other WLS about Fitday.  It keeps me straight.
I beleive I have become truly fed up with canned fish like tuna and salmon. I had some for lunch and I decided that I don't want to eat it for a while. I have had more tuna and salmon in the past three weeks than I have for the last year. 
I am looking forward to my six week check up at Dr. Babineau's Monday. I can start eating more of a regular diet (within reason) than what I have been eating.  
I have been dealing with an unreasonable fear. I have been weighing myself every Monday morning. What if I when I get on the scale at the doctor's and I haven't lost anything? What if my scale is wrong (had that happen before)?  I really can't see much weight loss in the mirror and I am worrying. I know this is not a justified fear since my children and my best friend tell me that they see change. But I am worried and will be like this until I weigh in Monday afternoon. 
My biggest fear is that I am one of those people who don't lose weight with the surgery. Hence, that's why I diligently follow the dietary guidelines Dr. Babineau set.  I just have to stop obsessing about it. I want this surgery to work with all my heart.

Thought I had Bio lab today but it doesn't start until next week. I was kind of disappointed because I am bored being at home all the time. In the past, boring led to eating and it's a habit I have been working on breaking. I drink water when I want to eat and that seems to work. Here's a wow moment. I am usually breathless and panting hard when I walk the campus to class. Not today!!! I didn't notice until I went back to the van. I am so excited because it is one of the main reasons for getting the surgery...getting healthy. It made my day!

I woke up this morning to find out that the kids schools are closed and my college is closed. The kids are celebrating since it's been years since they had a bad weather day.  I was kind of looking forward to starting my classes. 
The bad news is that my husband had a pass this weekend and won't be able to make it home. Bad weather at the start here and bad weather there at the end of the weekend make it unsafe for him to travel.  So, we won't see him for a couple of weeks.  Now it will be up to mom to help my youngest two make their pinewood derby cars.  What fun!
I weighed myself on Monday and found that I only lost a pound. At first I was bummed but then I reminded myself that all is not lost in pounds but also in inches. I think it's time to measure and see what the tape measure says. 
I am torn about the clothes thing. My pants are very baggy and I am curious about if I can fit the next size down. However, I fear trying the next size on and it not fitting yet. I had that happen when I lost 60 pounds on Medifast.  I would be seriously upset. So, I guess I'll wait a little longer until I can muster up the courage to try on a new size.
Well, off to make my breakfast protein drink. For those in the Big Freeze, stay warm!

I was on the comment site today and there's a lot of miffed people about today's The View. Please! Easy way out? WLS is not for the weak.
My husband is Army through and through. For years, I heard, "If you would just reduce your caloric intake and excercise more...you'd lose the weight."  He has seen me struggle up and up and down. He's seen me diagnosed with PCOS and seen my struggle to get past the 275 mark my body doesn't want to do.
He supported this surgery because I wanted it. He did admit that he thought it was the easy way out. But he supported me. Since the surgery and seeing me lose for the first time in a while, and my commitment to the WLS rules, he has done a 180. He no longer sees this as an easy way out. He now believes that there are people in the world where standard diets do not work and sometimes WLS is required.
When I look at Rosie O'Donnell I see a woman who is going to have serious health issues due to her weight. She has a partner and children...doesn't she want to be around a long time for them? I want to be there for my husband and my children for a long time.

Today, I am four weeks post op and 31 pounds lighter!!! Although I can't see it in the mirror, I know it won't be long before I can see it.  I plan on having a picture taken ever month so that I can see where it is coming off. Right now, it seems to be coming off my neck and fingers. Very strange but hey I am not complaining.
I went out to Red Lobster last week for my son's b-day and ordered half grilled salmon plate with a baked potato on the side. It was so nice to eat something not from my freezer or fridge!  
I keep being asked what I want for my birthday...it's my 40th. I don't really want anything...I am working on a improved healthier me and don't want to buy anything that I will give away during this year. I want to really celebrate next year.  I kind of feel like I'm in a cocoon right now.  
I can't wait to see what the scale next week!

Well, I have survived another Christmas! I got a new blender to make my protein shakes in and it's really nice. My oldest son made me a beautiful CD of songs that were my favorites. I cried.
Had dinner with my inlaws. It was not as bad as I thought it would be. I did set myself up for failure by anticipating that mashed potatoes would be served and they weren't. My mom-in-law made her German potato salad and candied yams. Both have sugar in them. Lucky for me, I brought a "just in case" bag with stuff I can eat. I have come to the decision that I will need to bring along dishes that I can eat and others will enjoy when we have family gatherings. I didn't really mind that I couldn't eat anything on the table because I weighed myself in the a.m. and found myself 23 pounds lighter!!! What a great Christmas present!!!

Just wanted to check in. I don't know why but this last week I have been energetic in the a.m. and exhausted in the p.m. So, my sis and I plan most things like shopping in the mornings to take advantage of my energy. I also am incorporating more walking into our outings. The lack of parking at the stores has been very good for me.  
Got a surprise yesterday. A pair of pants I've not been able to wear for months fit (not tight either)!!! That was a great surprise and I was ecstatic! I can't wait to say goodbye to all my 30W and move down to 28W! 
I have decided to weigh myself once a week at this point. I have issues with scales and I thought I would break a bad habit.  Last Monday, the scale said I had lost 17 pounds! I was amazed.  I am so thankful for the WLS.
Had problems with chewable vitamins (several kinds) and have settled on liquid. GNC's is awful! But it does not disagree with my pouch and I will suffer in order to get in my nutrients I need. I plan on seeing if there are better tasting liquid vitamins out there. 
Well, off to bed.
 Merry Christmas to all!