Trish M.
6 Month Update!!!
Apr 03, 2007
Time for an update!!! My life has changed tremendously in the last six months and I'm not even close to the end of my journey. This surgery was life saving, in more ways than one. Aside from the absence of health problems now, my attitude, my outlook, my motivation has changed so so very much. I am now LIVING!!!!
No real food issues. I'm rarely hungry anymore at all. My Dr. says a small percentage of people never feel hunger again. I must be one of the lucky ones. Once every so often I will actually feel hungry, but its not very often. The amount of food I can eat varies....some times its just a couple of bites, some times its more. New problems I am having are with carbs. I cannot tolerate them anymore, not that I ate alot post surgery. However, now I seem to dump if I have more than just a couple bites. Still cannot tolerate sugar and am grateful for that!!
More importantly, I am happy again!! I don't live in fear anymore. No more fear of being in public, feeling like I'm a freakshow. I feel normal again. I still have a long way to go, another 80 lbs or so, but its so nice to feel normal again. I've noticed a few heads turn my way. Its an ego booster for the moment but it stops there. I'm just glad someone would take a second look. Before it was for the wrong reason!!! I'm out and about all the time now. I want OUT......out of the house to live a life I've chosen not to live in a very long time. My children are loving it!!! My husband is loving it too, I think. I think he has moments that he is nervous. I think my weight provided a certain security for him. He never had to worry about anyone taking an interest in his wife, they'd have to be crazy. He is supportive when I encourage it. Compliments happen when I fish for them.
I find myself wanting to walk up to every obese person I see and educate them JUST IN CASE they don't know this surgery is available. Of course I can't, but I sure wish I could!! I find myself being sometimes too forthcoming with information. Someone will give me a simple compliment, such as "You really look great" and I'll reply, "Thanks, I had gastric bypass and I've lost 110 pounds!" I know its silly but I just want to shout it from the rooftops in case anyone out there doesn't know this is a possibility. I love having had this surgery and only regret that I didn't do it sooner!!!
I want to keep up with my WOW moments, there have been many. I should have started listing them as they were happening but I'll start now. They are little moments that make me feel oh-so-good!
*At 2 1/2 months post op I wore a pair of jeans, regardless of the fact that they were a size 24, I thought I looked good. I hadn't worn jeans in probably 15 years!
*At 3 1/2 months post op I could fit on any ride I went on at the Rodeo!!
*Everytime my son measures me by hugging me and telling me how much further his arms reach around me and I hear the excitement in his voice.
*Shopping and not having to automatically go for the largest size the store carries.
*Being able to cross my legs.
*My step-son telling me that I look like a teenager.
*My daughter bringing over a male friend from school for dinner and, after meeting him and the two of them going into the living room.....my daughter coming back in to tell me "Roger" saw me at a volleyball game months ago and I look fantastic now!!! Who would expect that from a 17 year old boy????
*Weighing less than my husband.
six months post op 228 lbs
THREE MONTH UPDATE
Jan 02, 2007
This has been a fun month, for the most part. A few downs, but nothing to dwell on. A stall here and there but eventually the scale starts to move again, and when it does its usually pretty significant. I've learned that I have a stall about every 3 weeks and it usually lasts about a week. Now that I see a pattern, I can kind of expect it and know that eventually it will pass. This was VERY frustrating at first, and at times it brought me to tears. No real problems with foods, aside from sugars, I tolerate just about anything. I did learn that processed cheese makes my dump. Not sure why.
The issues with body image are, for the moment, reversed with me. Usually we still see ourselves as large as we were and have a hard time seeing the smaller us. I'm the opposite, I see smaller than what I am and when I see a photograph of myself or go shopping for clothes I'm shocked at what I see, expecting someone smaller than what I see. These are issues I can deal with, gladly. Easier so far than the issues pre-op.
I do see my relationship with my husband changing a bit. Although I'm not sure that it is related to my surgery and weight loss so far. I seem to be less tolerable of his imperfections. Who do I think I am? What right do I have? I am much more irritable with him despite him being very supportive. I do believe I am handling the emotional aspects of the loss up to this point very well, adapting and adjusting. Perhaps I just need to put that same effort into the relationship. Time will tell.
3 months post op 266 lbs.
TWO MONTH UPDATE
Dec 11, 2006
Today I am actually 10 weeks post op, so this is a little more than 2 months. Its been a very frustrating month. I was on a plateau for about 3 1/2 weeks, literally bouncing up and down with the same 3 or 4 pounds. I am now so excited that I've lost 9 pounds in the last two days!!! I stopped losing because my caloric intake was just TOO low. Imagine being told you aren't eating enough!!! I was only consuming about 300 calories a day and my body just went into starvation mode and held on to everything it had. I added a protein shake to my diet (I honestly don't get one in every day, but I try) and after drinking this I am literally full for a good while and have to force myself to eat throughout the day to get enough calories in.
No new updates on foods. I have had a couple times that I've eaten too fast or maybe didn't chew well enough and was miserable until I force myself to throw up. Not pleasant and it has only happened a couple times. Usually when I'm in a hurry or not concentrating on my eating. Thanksgiving actually wasn't too bad. I picked 3 things that I really wanted and had a little of each. I attempted a sugar free pecan pie and it was a disaster. Watching everyone else have dessert was a little tough. After a while, my Mom really felt sorry for me so she made some sugar free vanilla pudding for me to have and I dumped on it from the 2% milk. I can tolerate sugar and sugar alcohols in amounts LESS than what my nutritionist said most people can tolerate. Good for me, it helps keep me in check!!
I've gone back to work (I was blessed with 2 months off, although I didn't need it at all). At that point nothing in my closet fit any longer so I had to buy new scrubs to go back. This is gonna get a little expensive, but at least I'm undergrowing instead of outgrowing. So expensive, but fun. I can live with that!! My nurse manager, having had this surgery herself, has been very supportive as have all of my coworkers. The reponses from everyone after going back were amazing, even a little embarassing that they carried on so much. I haven't had one negative experience from family, friends, or coworkers, so I've been fortunate.
So onward, to get past the Christmas holidays. These may be the tough ones, but I think I'll make it. If you've never been to San Antonio, the most beautiful thing about it is the Riverwalk at Christmas time. A river that runs through the heart of downtown, decorated with lights, restaurants along the river, riverside dining, barges with carolers......JUST BEAUTIFUL. I've lived here all my life and never get tired of the Riverwalk at Christmas. We took the kids this week and there is this amazing candy shop that I love to stop into. I found some great sugar free candy that I nibbled on while others enjoyed ice cream and I was perfectly content. We'll see, I just have to stay focused.
With another month gone by, I still have to say that I have no regrets. Yes, its still sacrifices when I cannot have some of the things I use to enjoy but these are sacrifices I can live with and sacrifices that are well worth the joy of the outcome!!!
ONE MONTH UPDATE
Nov 03, 2006
ONE MONTH POST OP Today I am 1 month post op and I must say, this is quite a learning experience. Recovery has been pretty uneventful. I consider myself very lucky that I haven't had any complications other than a small wound opening up and becoming infected. It is healing well on its own without medications, per the Dr's advice. I was really surprised how quickly I was up and about and getting back to "normal".....although I'm learning that "normal" takes on a whole new meaning. To date, I haven't been nauseated or thrown up once, which was something I had been dreading by hearing others talk about it. I'm learning quickly what my new little tummy can handle and what it cannot. I advanced pretty quickly through the liquids and soft food stage. I'm finding I can tolerate pretty much anything I try, not that I've pushed it. The one thing I have learned that I cannot tolerate, even in small amounts, is sugar alcohols. I become very crampy and gassy. I haven't, nor do I intend to, push the sugar limits. I decided that I never want to learn what dumping feels like, or worse, learn that I'm one of the "lucky" ones that doesn't. A normal "meal" for me is about 1 oz of meat and a few bites of veggies. I've learned about how much it takes to satisfy me and I usually stop while I'm still a little hungry. A short time after, I feel satisfied, not full. I'm learning that finding different things to eat is challenging. I'm already bored with foods and not really interested in eating much. Getting all my liquids in is also a challenge. It literally takes sipping ALL DAY LONG. I'm bored with water and flavored waters but this is all a part of it and I will continue doing what I need to do.
Emotionally, most of my days are good days, so far. Immediately post op I had a really hard time not being able to sit at the table for dinner with my family. One thing I've always insisted on is dinner together, at the dinner table, no TV, no distractions.....so that was a difficult phase to get through. I have moments that I am angry that I cannot eat everything they are eating. I have moments that I am angry at THEM for eating things I cannot. They have been extremely understanding and have put up with me, so far!! I'm very excited and very amazed at how quickly I began noticing a change in the mirror. My clothes are getting loose and looser, although its not quite time to buy new sizes. I've not gone back to work yet, but have already had to throw out my old nursing uniforms, they are ALL too big!!
I'm amazed at how much better I feel already. I began walking 1/2 a mile daily at about a week out. Prior to surgery, I would have never made it that short distance without my back hurting and being short of breath. At one month out, I'm walking between 1 to 1 1/2 miles at least 4 or 5 times a week. My weight loss shows it when I become lazy and skip a few days. I've been off my blood pressure medications since the day of surgery. I'm actually WANTING to get out and go places and do things....this is new for me!!! I'm so very excited.
My amazing husband and family have been so supportive and understanding. They are excited for me! I know that they are excited for themselves as well, for their lives will be so much more active as well as a result of me feeling better!!!
One month post op 303
Home from the Hospital
Oct 07, 2006
Well my surgery was on the 3rd and I came home on the 5th. No complications (thank the Lord!). When I woke in recovery I remember thinking that I was feeling more pain than I was expecting but nothing that wasn't tolerable with the pain medication. I was in recovery for about 2 hours because the bed wasn't ready on the floor. When they took me to my room there was a male in the other bed and the only other room available was a private room so I got lucky. That was a blessing!!! I don't think I would have been happy in a semi-private room and definitely recommend paying the extra money for a private room. I had no tubes when I woke up. No NG tube, no catheter. Its funny but the NG tube was what I was worried about most with the surgery. I was able to have ice chips fairly early, probably a couple hours after I had gotten to my room and late that evening I had a clear liquid dinner. I was only able to tolerate a couple small spoonfuls of broth and jello. I wasn't hungry but just wanted so see if I could tolerate them. Walking wasn't too difficult, just made sure to use my Morhpine PCA beforehand. I had no complications post-op in the hospital except my heartrate and oxygen levels dropping a little after using my pain meds and sleeping so deep. I do have an on-Q pain ball, which is a subcutaneous infusion of Marcain into my abdomen and was sent home with that. I will be taking that out myself when the ball is empty.
So far I've really had nothing to eat except a scrambled egg. Other than that I've only had water and a couple bites of sugar free jello. It seemed odd to me before surgery to hear my surgeon tell me that it wasn't uncommon to not feel hunger for several days to several weeks after surgery. I could not imagine going that long without eating, but honestly, I do not feel hungry at all. When I ate the egg I think it was just the psychological part of "wanting" to eat. After eating it I felt neither full or hungry, I just didn't feel anything. After leaving the hospital I wanted to get a good scale so I had my husband stop at Wal-Mart and I ended up just walking through the store for 2 hours. It actually felt good to be just out and about. The hospital got real old, real quick. Not that I didn't receive excellent care. I did.
I was disappointed to know, after weighing myself in the hospital, that I was actally leaving the hospital weighing 10 pounds more than the morning I went in. I know this is due to all the fluids they infuse and the gas to expand your abdomen during surgery. Still frustrating.
So here I am, 4 days out. Last night I was having some pain and cried for a moment, asking myself why I had done this to myself. Its been hard seeing my family at the dinner table, seeing food commercials on TV. I know it'll get easier as my diet progresses and I am able to sit at the dinner table with them and actually eat dinner. Having said that, at this point I still do not regret having this surgery. My wonderful husband, Scott, was awesome. He has supported me every step of the way. He and my mom had a long couple days at the hospital and I cannot thank them enough for being there. I'm looking forward to the next couple weeks and increasing activity and progressing my diet and getting a little more back to normal!!
Here is a pic of my awesome surgeon, Dr. Stegemann.
Pre-op
Oct 02, 2006
My surgery is in the morning. I had a couple days where I was extremely nervous but now I'm just as calm as can be. It's early evening and I actually feel tired and as if I'll be able to sleep tonight. I didn't think I'd be able to get any sleep the night before due to being so nervous but it doesn't look like that will be the case. Off to bed.
Official pre-op weight 338
Change of Date
Sep 08, 2006
It seems all my excitement was premature. Turns out that surgery date wasn't convenient for my employer so I had to reschedule to give more notice. So, as of now my new date is October 3rd. I'm still excited, just wish it would hurry and get here.
I've noticed lately that I have alot more pain and uncoordination with things because of my weight. As I was walking like a little old woman today, I started thinking of where I would be a year from now if I weren't having this surgery. Its scary to think about it. The decline in my physical abilities just over the last 6 months makes me so grateful that I am being given this opportunity to change my life. For the most part, every profile I read here tells of people who are grateful to be given this tool but every once in a while I run across one who just took this surgery for granted. I cannot imagine taking this for granted. I cannot imagine not using this to get the best results possible. To see those that take this for granted at the same time there are people who would do anything in the world to have this same opportunity just angers me. Those people need to get a grip and wake up and realize how incredibly selfish and foolish they are.
I also see how this has changed so many attitudes. The profiles here go from depression and sadness to absolute happiness and fullness of energy after the surgery. I cannot wait to be with those people. I cannot wait to be on the losing side and BE HAPPY WITH LIFE!!! It's almost time for me.....world, here I come
A DATE!!!
Aug 28, 2006
I HAVE A DATE!!! I HAVE A DATE!!! WOOHOOOO! The Dr.'s office called early this morning to let me know the next available date was September 12th. I said, "I'll take it!!" Then I got off the phone and just started crying. So many emotions immediately surfaced....fear, excitement and disbelief that its actually happening. I think, for me at least, that I've been so involved in the fight to get to this point that the reality that this is a REAL major surgery gets forgotten. So when you have a tangible date, the nerves set in. I'm so excited!! Two weeks until my new life begins. I can't wait!!!
Frustration
Aug 18, 2006
*sigh of relief* After MUCH fighting with the insurance company and MUCH support from my employer I am so happy to say I AM APPROVED!!!!!! OMG it feels so good to say that. My employer stopped covering the surgery however, I finished my diet and all other requirements before the new policy went into effect. The insurance refused and refused to grandfather me in. While I'm at a loss because they have chosen to no longer cover the surgery, I am so proud to be able to say that my employer was SO proactive in this process. It turned out that there were 7 employees going through the same thing I was and Humana was really pressured to approve this surgery for all of us. Not alot of support or cooperation from the staff at my surgeon's office, which was disappointing, but the important thing is that I am comfortable with my surgeon, not the staff. It feels that, although I just have the approval and not the surgery date yet, that I can finally take a deep breath and tell myself that I am on my way. Its a feeling of relief. Its so very sad that you have to fight so hard for this, but I can definitely say, don't give up. Push and push and don't take no for an answer. I was told at least 4 times via my employer that Humana was still refusing to cover this but after much praying and pushing I got the answer I wanted. Can't wait to get a surgery date! Life was good today! Can't wait to be able to update again!!
Consult
Feb 13, 2006
I had my consult with my surgeon today....it went really well. Very in-depth and very long....about 6 hours. While I was there, I also met with the nutritionist and when y'all say everything is different depending on the Dr., y'all weren't kidding!!! He does NO protein shakes and eat as soon as you are ready! I was very comfortable with him. He sent me for a gallbladder ultrasound. Now all I have left is the mental health eval, the sleep study and the 6 month diet, which I am only 2 months into.
My husband was right by my side the entire time today....I really am lucky to have him.
