Question:
Is it possible to succeed long-term using only on-line support?

My surgeon is 3 hrs. away. I am pre-op. My brother had wls on 3/15 and he is VERY concerned that I don't have a support group. Should I woory?    — Shelley G. (posted on April 23, 2004)

April 23, 2004
On-line support has been all that I have used. At first (two years ago) there were no groups in my area and then when one started it was at night and I cannot drive then. Besides, I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and am frequently housebound or bedbound. I belong to a lot of online Yahoo groups but I only post to small ones (usually). The Graduate list is great to read after your surgery although you cannot post until after you are a full year out. There is also wls-uncensored (not WLS_uncensored), off-track, on-track, vitamins -- all sorts of groups. I learn something new every day. I also read the Q&A here on obesityhelp every day. I feel quite connected to the WLS community. Nina in Maine Open RNY 2/02 326/200
   — [Deactivated Member]

April 23, 2004
Because I chose to keep this surgery very private, I can not attend support groups. So, I only have this site as support. I have been very successful. I am 3 years and 3 months post op. You can do it as well. Shelley
   — Shelley.

April 23, 2004
I am 2 1/2 years post op from open RNY and I have lost a total of 150+ lbs and I have never attended a support group. I have my family,friends and this site and they were all I needed. I wish you all the luck and remember you always have us if you need us :)
   — Lynda T.

April 23, 2004
I attended a couple of support group meetings before surgery, and I think 1 since surgery (LapRNY 5/15/03) I would have liked to attend a few more, but I couldn't simply because of timing. I have had a wonderful support system at home with my family and online. Have you attended any meetings at all? Maybe you should try to attend 1 or 2, just so you can meet some people face to face that are in the same boat, and understand what you are going through. And you can see in person the wonderful results. I don't feel we all NEED the meetings, some do, and some don't, but I think it's a good idea to attend at least one or two before and after surgery. Good Luck to you, and remember, your brother is part of your personal support system and is only looking out for you!!!! :-) Down 121 lbs.
   — KellyJeanB

April 23, 2004
I go to a support group through where I had surgery at. And alot of people have a hard time going to support groups either because of being far away or timing with family and work and things. As for me I truthfully get more info and support through this site. The chat on here rocks.I have formed bonds with several people here,and would not trade any of them for the world.And it is easier to get more one on one support here then at a big support group meeting.And oddly enough I am the only one out of 50 people that has had my surgery type(VBGB)at my meetings. So I am very happy to get on here and talk to others that have had my type surgery.And the biggest plus is this site never sleeps and when you cant sleep and are worried in the middle of the night,we are here. Good Luck to you in your Journey. Autumn 6/3/04 VBGB 297/170/?
   — Autumn

April 23, 2004
The extent to which any of us needs support really depends upon what brought you to needing weight loss surgery. If you were like many of us who felt that we were addicted to food, overeating to the point of it hurting our health, damaging our relationships and allowing us to hide from our lives' problems, a support group (or some form of counseling) helps. If, however, you are like so many others who became obese due to poor diet over a long period of time and for whom food serves as no particular emotional or psychological crutch, then having a support group is less critical. What I've found in the groups for which I serve as a facilitator is that the social aspects of knowing you have similarly situated peers help in the initial months where you may start to feel isolated-- being able to see the faces of those going through comparable problems can provide some comfort. There is also a lot to be said for feeling accountable to peers when you feel like falling off the program-- knowing that you have face-to-face contact with others can reinforce that motivation. But, with close friends, neighbors and family members who are involved with your recovery, they can often serve many of the same function as support group members if you'll let them. We all need information, answers to the questions that arise along the way and some motivation to sustain the effort. But, ultimately, we all take this journey alone, whether we confide our woes to our closet friend, on a obesityhelp message board or to a roomful of weight loss surgery peers. Good luck in your decision.
   — SteveColarossi

April 24, 2004
I went to a couple support groups, but as they were far away and I have small children, I used the on-line support instead. I did fine.
   — mom2jtx3

April 24, 2004
I am currently 2 days shy of being 16 weeks post op. My surgeon is 2 hours 20 minutes from my home. I do not have a support group here, but I do read the message boards from this website and from my physician's website. Reading the boards helps me deal with questions I have and I also post questions from time to time. But, when all is said and done, if I am concerned about something, I call my surgeon's office. He is a wonderful surgeon and also has given all his patients his home number in case we have problems that need his attention immediately. The staff in his office is very good to find out answers for me and to return my calls. I've only had to call my physician once at home. By all means, if there is a support system close to you, join it. The only one we have here is geared only for the surgeons in this area and I have chosen not to join. I have friends here and online that I talk to and that helps immensely. This truly is a great connection and I read faithfully everyday. It helps to know others have the same concerns and fears you have and they can help you realize the differences in everyone. Hope this helps...Kathy
   — Katherine F.

April 24, 2004
I have been to two support group meetings in the last 2.5 years since my surgery. The first was filled with pre-ops asking tons of questions. 30 people in the meeting 2 were post-op. I didn't mind answering thier questions or helping in any way. I just don't see how attending that sort of support meeting regularly would be support for me. The second was in a different area of the country. It was mainly post-ops but all were more concerned with thier plastic surgery and how hot their butt looked now that it made me sick. I walked away from that meeting in total disgust. I have managed to live w/o support group meetings.
   — RebeccaP

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