Ah, do you bring back memories of shopping for Jillian's prom! She turns 21 in 3 weeks! I remember hating the dress she ended up wearing for her high school prom - but I swallowed my tongue and the important thing is she felt beautiful on prom night - and ya know what? She was beautiful, even in a dress I wouldn't have picked out for anything... she let me help with her makeup and hair and we had a great time together. Have fun, Kim, relish the moment! Love ya - Maureen

I'm with Mike.... just too danged tired. 

I used to have good days and bad days.  A few days ago, I realized that I haven't had a good day since September or October.  I went from good days and bad days to bad days and not so bad days.  Lately I've vascillated between bad days and terrible days. 

I'm having serious trouble with the back - the reason for the bad days.  Spent Thursday and Friday curled up in a fetal position, crying.  No relief to be had from the disk that is pressing on a nerve root in my back.  Imagine a charley horse that is never ending.  That's what the spasms in my back feel like and the pain running down my leg makes me understand why animals will gnaw off their own limbs.  Luckily my foot is numb so I won't feel it if I start to gnaw there.  I had ultrasound, deep tissue massage, 2 different level 2 narcotics, 2 kinds of muscle relaxers, heat, ice, electric stimulation and it just wouldn't let up Thursday and Friday.  By Saturday it had eased up enough for me to take a ton of meds and work Saturday, Sunday and both jobs on Monday.  I'm so tired of being drugged.  I don't understand why people are so attracted to these drugs, I hate them and would give them up in a heart beat if I could. 

Criminy, I'm on stronger drugs than Rush Limbaugh was addicted to .  True story...  They put me on the Fentanyl patch.  It wasn't helping much and I found out that the FDA had issued a public health advisory about the patch.  Seems that death was a side effect.  So I take the box of patches back to the pain doctor.  Two nurses come in the room bedecked in full scrubs and rubber gloves.  They count the patches that I've turned in and the doc tells me that these things garner big bucks on the streets.  Heroin addicts like to chew them, but they often die.  I watch the nurses carefully destroy the patches by cutting them up in little pieces and putting them in a hazardous waste container.  They then scrub down all the counters, the scissors and themselves with alcohol.  What the hell have these people had me put on my body?  So I'm back on my morphine.  Every 3 or 4 hours, more morphine.  What I take is stronger than Oxycontin.  I take pills for nerve damage.  I take other pills for muscle spasms.  I take 5 different meds every day to fight the pain.  The pharmacy keeps my drugs in a safe.  What the hell am I putting in my body?  Nothing helps the Rheumatoid Arthritis and degenerative disk disease that is eating at my spine.  3 years ago I was 5' 6".  Now I'm 5' 4" if I stand as straight as possible.  At this rate, I won't be tall enough to ride the Flying Teacups at Disneyland in another 3 years. 

I think of you guys all the time and feel like a jerk for not being around much.  I don't even lurk.  I just feel that I have little to contribute these days.  All I have to write about is work and pain.  Any attempts to lose more weight or even maintain are on the back burner for me.  I'm just trying to put one foot in front of the other and get through the day. 

There's some hope though.  I see a surgeon tomorrow afternoon and maybe, just maybe I can get some good days again. 

I'm still breathing, but it hurts.

C.

Im here alive and spoken for...just getting over this darn sickness and now going nuts trying to find daughter her prom dress arggggggg.... shopping with a daughter is soooo hard, what I think is beautiful she doesnt like, and vice versa..I remember my son, a simple black tux and good to go LOL..when will all this fun end! Oh well...Im sure when we find the right dress she will be gorgeous as ever!!!!!!!!! My baby is growing up toooooo fast!

Thanks Mike, You are not that late, it's still the same week!!
Have a good #6 as well

You know Me, I am still around & was wondering the exact same thing. Still looking for work. Getting use to new meds, feeling better but don't like the side effects. Tried
to get a hold of Doc & she is on vacation till next week. So just have to live with them
for now.