giveing the band a bad name

I should of known I would screw this up, I just feel so bad for my band, I'm giving it a bad name.  I'm not sorry I did this, I'm hoping the fills will kick in and help me. I guess this was my last attempt at something, if I wouldn't have tried it, I would  never know.  Other WLS were not an option for me, so this BAND hassss to work. Or I should say I HAVE TO WORK....I screwed up diets before, why not this...??  My husband is so discussted with me.  He keeps looking at me, shaking his head.  I'm gonna hide for a while. 

It's not easy. It will get better once you get a fill. It's hard to get full quickly when you still have the use of your whole stomach. Don't beat yourself up. Even we rny'ers struggle.

What happen???? do you need someone to talk to????

Cheryl, no hiding, come on girl, what is up, write to me privately if you need to. I am here...

guys,  I'm just not doing perfectly, i'm not gainning but also not loosing, I know I'm suppose to wait till I get a fill, but I am just dissapointed in myself and so is my husband. He hasn't said anything, but, when I eat he looks at me and shakes his head.  So many people are doing so well, I'm just so hard on myself.  I know everything you will all tell me "walk, don't be so hard on yourself, be patient"  i'm just not !  I dont' want to keep whinning, you guys are always so possitive and i'm a pooper.  But just think about how you would feel if you went thru the WLS and didn't loose any weight yet, but everyone else was doing so well.  wouldn't you be hard on yourself too?? and dissapointed with yourself?  I guess their has to be someone who is a pain in the butt. lol.... I just set some small goals before surgery and I just went to cross them off and redo them, cause non of them I have reached.  and they were far from being too hard.  that is what started the whole bummer/mood...blahhhhhhhh !!!!! you must know me by now, I have to ***** at least once a week.   Thanks for being there for me and sorry !! Cheryl 

Ya know, I bet this is exactly why he said to not surround yourself with RYNs for support.  Remember back then we all thought he was crazy, and how could he say that when we are all so supportive.  While we are being supportive---you are feeling bad because you see everyone losing so fast and you are still struggling.  Well listen here girlfriend...you don't have a fill.  It's almost like you didn't even have the surgery at all.  Pretend you are still in the beginning stages of the process and your "surgery" is coming up (when you get your fill).  Because in essence, that is when you will be able to use your tool.  If I had no restriction in my stomach I would be eating away I am sure.  That is why we all need this surgery...to help us to control our eating and to force ha*****anges.  You actually don't have anything to help yet because you haven't had a fill.  Although it is super hard, try not to be so hard on yourself.  Start fresh from when you get the fill.  Maybe you should scratch your whole goal list and make a new one.  By not gaining that is a positive in my book.  It would be so easy to gain until you get your fill.  We're all here...vent away....

Thank you, this is why this site is so awesome, and it really is teaching me new things every day.  And I dont' mean about WLS.  About being envious of others, (LIke Dr. L said) your right, I could be gainning, so just counting my cal. and maintaining is a goal... I knew it would be slow, just didnt' expect it to be non existing...lol  BTW... how is your mom doing???

Cheryl,  Even for us that had rny it is not always comming off the way we would wish.  During the time that I was lurking and trying to get caught up I was at the doctors office 1 week apart. (between surgeon post op and nut post op) and in that week I actually gained a pound.  I was like so bummed because I did not eat stuff that I should not.  I was really getting down on myself.  Now you have had the surgery and your mind says you should be dropping the weight but you have not had a fill so you have no restriction.  If you could loose the weight with no restriction you would not have needed the surgery.  Keeping even at this point is good.  Your DH will not understand this because he has not been there.  Please keep your chin up your first fill is soon and that will start with some restriction (but remember you will need more).  soon you will be where you need to be with fills and it will be a completely different story.

Rant and rave all you want girl. Scream shout let it all out. I know how hard this must be on you. The fill will help I have no doubt. Just try and keep your chin up. I know you can make it til your fill you must be doing something ok if you are not gaining right? So pat yourself on the back you must be making good food choices for the most part. If you want to let us know what you eat through the course of an average day maybe we can help you out.

Im sorry your having a hard time Cheryl!!! Hang in there!!!LEt your Dh read some of the posts..so he knows this is normal..and NOT failure. You can do it.....the fill will be here and youll be on your way!! Keep sharing your thoughts..Its SO important!! Let it out!!!