the first day i felt hope (wls journey) *long*
hi all,
i've been thinking about this a lot and decided that i wanted to share some of my story with you.
i've been fat, fat, fat for about the last 15 years. i was always thin before that, so my horrible eating habits caught up with me, a medication made me gain weight, i just half-way tried things like Jenny Craig (truly an awful experience) and WW (lost 85 lbs and then gained it all back). i've been hopeless for so long. i never felt like i had enough will or ability to get rid of the weight. i felt lazy and ugly and hopeless. i know you all know about those feelings.
a year ago my partner and i went on vacation. sitting on a deck at a restaurant overlooking beautiful lake tahoe, eating a veggie burger (i was trying!!), i said to her: sometimes i think i should do something like get the lap-band. much to my surprise, she said, why not? that's a great idea! i don't know why i thought she would think it was a bad idea, but that's the way my mind was working, lol. and so i started thinking, thinking, thinking.
but this is the nugget of the story: when we were at the airport on our way home, i looked at all the woman who passed by, as i always did, and instead of thinking, is she heavier than me? is that what i look like? why can't i be thin like her? am i the only one who's done this???? this time, i sat in the airport looking at people and thinking, i can have surgery, i don't have to be this heavy, i can really change!!!!! it was the first time i felt hope in all the time that i have been so heavy. i felt like i could really take control of my life -- and it was amazing!!!!
now i've got my sleeve, i'm losing weight, i'm eating well (okay, trying to, not always perfect!) and i've got all of my OH family. i'm so lucky to have your support, to have found out about the sleeve, to find out what a great tool it is, you name it!!!! love you guys a bunch! ((((hugs)))
i've been thinking about this a lot and decided that i wanted to share some of my story with you.
i've been fat, fat, fat for about the last 15 years. i was always thin before that, so my horrible eating habits caught up with me, a medication made me gain weight, i just half-way tried things like Jenny Craig (truly an awful experience) and WW (lost 85 lbs and then gained it all back). i've been hopeless for so long. i never felt like i had enough will or ability to get rid of the weight. i felt lazy and ugly and hopeless. i know you all know about those feelings.
a year ago my partner and i went on vacation. sitting on a deck at a restaurant overlooking beautiful lake tahoe, eating a veggie burger (i was trying!!), i said to her: sometimes i think i should do something like get the lap-band. much to my surprise, she said, why not? that's a great idea! i don't know why i thought she would think it was a bad idea, but that's the way my mind was working, lol. and so i started thinking, thinking, thinking.
but this is the nugget of the story: when we were at the airport on our way home, i looked at all the woman who passed by, as i always did, and instead of thinking, is she heavier than me? is that what i look like? why can't i be thin like her? am i the only one who's done this???? this time, i sat in the airport looking at people and thinking, i can have surgery, i don't have to be this heavy, i can really change!!!!! it was the first time i felt hope in all the time that i have been so heavy. i felt like i could really take control of my life -- and it was amazing!!!!
now i've got my sleeve, i'm losing weight, i'm eating well (okay, trying to, not always perfect!) and i've got all of my OH family. i'm so lucky to have your support, to have found out about the sleeve, to find out what a great tool it is, you name it!!!! love you guys a bunch! ((((hugs)))
Ann 
Glad to read about your decision to turn your life around. Great news, and well done. It was a big leap for me too.
If you don't mind clarifying, I'm a bit confused... It says VSG (vertical sleeve gastrectomy) in January by your name, but you mention band as well as sleeve in your post....Did you start with a lap band and then have a revision?
It's not a big deal, as long as it's working for you it's all good. Just curious.
Thanks for the good vibes.
If you don't mind clarifying, I'm a bit confused... It says VSG (vertical sleeve gastrectomy) in January by your name, but you mention band as well as sleeve in your post....Did you start with a lap band and then have a revision?
It's not a big deal, as long as it's working for you it's all good. Just curious.
Thanks for the good vibes.
I think I can relate to that. Since I've made my decision I seem to have more confidence already. I don't try to hide as much or something. I'm not sure why, but now that I know I do have hope I feel more like being a part of life again. That's great your partner is supportive. That makes a big difference. Way to go!
Something clicked (but doesn't always *stay* clicked!) that surgery might actually work, might be a reasonable alternative, I might actually have given my very best effort for a long time to all other methods, this might actually keep me from dying early. My partner was also supportive - which is surprising since she is the kind of person to take one Advil (two's a lot!) and went way out of her comfort zone to get her ears pierced. It made me feel like I'm not nuts to take this seriously and I do owe it to myself to see if there is a solution. And I still get scared!
:) Happy
53 yrs old, 5'6" HW: 293 ConsW: 273 SW: 263 CW: 206 
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