Not Worth It - Angry Rant about crappy sleeve

Could_It_Be
on 5/26/12 9:32 am
This post reminds me of a three year old throwing a temper tantrum. Pull up your big girl/guy panties and LISTEN to what people are telling you here.

 You say the only thing stopping you is you...great news!! Let me tell you, once you are a few months out that will be a valuable skill set. Here's a little secret, the only thing stopping most of us is OURSELVES!

You need to talk to your doc, nutritionist and absolutely the psychologist. If you are so angry now, you are in for a world of hurt in the future.

Take a deep breath, go for a walk, have a protein shake and enjoy life.
             
VSG on 6/22/11
seeingmyselfthere
on 5/26/12 9:33 am
VSG on 03/07/12
 then great! what's there to be upset about? if you're controling your eating and losing about a pound a day then you're doing it! the objective is to lose weight and develop a healthy relationship with food - right. sounds like you're already there. one guarantee - you can't remove 80 - 85% of ANYONE's stomach and it doesn't affect they're capacity for eating - it's basic physics. what everyone before me is trying to convey is it will be a few more weeks before you are eating the types of foods - like dense proteins - that will allow you to feel the 'restriction' you desire. but the great thing is - while you're waiting to get to that part of you're program, you have the ability - as you said - to make it happen on your own.

remember - the sleeve was only ever designed to be a tool.  your journey will be no different than any of ours. we all have to make choices every day that will determine our success - because it's not guaranteed... even with the help of the sleeve. don't be deceived into thinking anyone is just coasting through this process. everyone experiencing meaningful and long-lasting change is having to work at it, just like you. some may have more restriction but find it hard to make the right choices - others might ave less restriction with disciplined eating but can't get motivated to exercise. keep visiting this forum - you'll hear both the successes and struggles of not only newly sleeved but veterans in maintenance-mode. no free pass for anyone - we all have to face our demons and the sleeve doesn't fix all that.

nd how we set our attitude will go a long way. rather than dwelling on where you wish you were, try focusing on how far you've come - even if you believe you did it all by yourself - what an amazing accomplishment! absolutely nothing to take lightly.

i'm assuming you decided to have this surgery for many of the same reasons as others - you've tried in the past and couldn't lose, couldn't keep it off, couldn't control your eating or some combination. trust that your sleeve can help you if you give it a chance - but two weeks isn't enough time before you hrow in the towel on a permanent lifestyle change. just my thoughts - hope it helps.

              
AmberK
on 5/26/12 11:36 am
VSG on 03/07/12 with
 Hey girl....how are you doing? I have not talked to you in a while. I am doing well....I have lost 35 pounds, and hit a stall this week........

 VSG 3/07/12     HW:260   SW: 249   CW:164  



 

seeingmyselfthere
on 5/26/12 1:40 pm
VSG on 03/07/12
 hi amber!!!! i'm so glad to her you're doing well.  35lbs - woot!!!! that's what i'm talkin'bout!!!! i've hit a few sort-term stalls too - i've kind of gotten use to them now - but still no fun. :-( but the good news is if you keep going you'll break through it in no time. i've been super consistent with tracking every single bite i eat and exercising for at least an hour each day - 6 days a week.  the exercise seems to help me lose at a more steady pace - but i still find myself looking at the scale with only one eye open - lol. i know you are super focused - this stall will pass soon. in the mean time, don't forget to keep track of your measurements - i always lose inches when i'm not losing pounds. you're probably doing the same. :-)

hope you're having a gret weekend!

              
Danna S.
on 5/26/12 11:45 pm - Brazoria, TX
 I haven't had surgery yet, but these are some things I've learned to be prepared for:
Slider foods- anything mushy or liquid will go straight through your new stmach and not stck around to give you the "full" feeling you had before surgery. With those, you have to measure your food and stop at that because your stomach is not going to do it for you.
Hunger- in the beginning your stomach is swollen and angry which can give you the feeling of hunger without actually being true hunger. This can also occur later down the road because something you ate has angered your stomach because it wasn't the right thing to eat. Also acid reflux can give you a hunger feeling and Previcid or something like that helps to get rid of that feeling. 

These are just some things I've learned from my future surgeon and from the awesome people here. When something goes wrong or feels like it does, we always feel like no one else is going through it and we are completely unique. It's easy to get so upset that it's hard for us to hear otherwise. Talk to your surgeon and really step back and listen to all of your fellow sleevers. They've been there and done it and then passed it. :) this too shall pass! The sleeve is not a magic bullet, but a tool that we can use to get to our goal. We have to do the work. I wish you the best on your journey! It will get better! :)
Jaybee766
on 5/26/12 9:14 am - Silver Spring, MD
VSG on 02/27/12 with
I'm going to let you have your feelings because they belong to you.  That being said, my only bit of input (teeny tiny little bit of input) is that this journey is bigger than just weightloss and restriction.  Yes - that brought many of us here but just an aside - I was INCREDIBLY emotional the first 4 or 5 weeks.  I mean SERIOUSLY emotional - for me, more tearful than normal but I can imagine that for others it can show up in anger.  Well honey it seems that the anger train is parked in your front yard right now.  All aboard and watch out!!!!   Let it out and if you can get someone to talk to if it doesn't level out in a few weeks or so.  Hope through it all you're sleeping and drinking as much water as you can stand.  Hang in there. 
Jeanne 

Height 5'7"   HW: 314     SW: 293

        
hwag5149
on 5/26/12 9:16 am
You've lost 17 pounds in a little over 2 weeks. That's good progress.

Even though you say you feel no restriction, I guarantee if you buy a Big Mac meal and tried to eat it all you'd feel restriction (and probably cause a leak). You can't eat the way you used to even though you think you can. As others suggested, try a PPI. Big difference.

Head hunger has nothing to do with surgery. That's all your responsibility.

It seems that you are in a period of mourning and were expecting extreme and instant results.

3 weeks out I was an emotional wreck for a lot of reasons. Give it some time. Things will change.


HW 380.8+  SW- 371.4  CW- 234.4  GW- 200 

 

Could_It_Be
on 5/26/12 9:36 am, edited 5/26/12 9:39 am
 Another thought, you say you eat 600-700 cals a day at two weeks out, what are you eating??

How many carbs? Grams of protein? Ounces of water??

If you truly want help, give us some more info so we can help!
             
VSG on 6/22/11
louisamay
on 5/26/12 9:46 am
VSG on 04/27/12
You're angry and I understand why--because at this point you don't feel the difference you expected to.

I have not been aware of restrictions except since I started dense proteins, and not always then.  In a way, maybe we'd be luckier if we were the ones who could only eat a few bites--but that would mean we'd feel worse, have more difficulty getting our protein, and might end up with worse problems.  On the other hand, you and I are having to learn NOW what the others will learn later--the skills that will keep us slim for the rest of our lives.

You have lost a tremendous amount of weight in the past 2 weeks.  And as much as a 4-day stall may feel like the end of the world, our bodies don't lose weight daily.  I stalled for over a WEEK.  But listen to this.  When the stall was a couple of days old I saw my sister.  A week later I saw her again.  She said, "Wow, you're really dropping the weight."  And I said, "I haven't lost anything since you saw me last week," and she said, "That can't be true.  I can see it in your face and neck."

That's one reason they tell us to take our measurements--because often during what seems like a stall, our body is still working, trying to adjust to the assault it's under.

All I can suggest is that you first, understand that the fat loss is probably releasing a lot of hormones into your body, and that may be fueling your emotions.  Second, be prepared for "stalls" and just know that they will happen.  Nobody can lose weight every single day.  The only people I know who have done that had severe illnesses, not WLS.  Going a bit slower and not being sick is much better!  And third, just keep doing what you're doing.  Keep yourself in line and give yourself a month and see what has changed.

All that said--what are your mushies?  Are you eating things that taste good to you? For me, my taste buds loved the new foods. I kept the portions small, weighed/measured everything.  But I did enjoy what I ate.

One more thing that others have touched on. Are you taking your antacid? You may need a stronger one.  Because often people confuse the discomfort in their stomachs and the gurgling in their intestines with hunger, when it's really not.  You really should check that out with your doctor.

I hope you feel better soon.  I truly believe if you hang tight and give it a chance, you'll end up LOVING your sleeve. 

[I'm not gaining weight. I keep lowering my goal!] [I LOVE MY SLEEVE!]

                  

    
Dawn Nash
on 5/26/12 10:12 am - HI
To those who offered encouraging words - thank you. I have been on this journey for a while and we all have our crosses to bare. Thank you for your support & encouragement to hang on when I'm clearly in need of support.

to those who choose to be mean, judgemental or talk down to me like I'm a child again I'll repeat my "throwing stones in a glass house".

I was approved for this surgery for 5 years and  because I understood the life altering changes it would make to my body & life I didn't jump in. I waited until I was darn good & ready. It took 5 years for me to come to terms with what this would do to me. 5 years of research, education, classes, support group! 5 years later I get the surgery expecting to walk away eating only 2-3 bites as so many of you say you can only eat. I expected to feel restriction just as I have been educated by my doc, nut and reading. I expected change - lots of changes and to my shock, dissappointment and yes, now anger I'm 5 years out and can still eat a lot if I choose. By my own restraint I haven't & don't. But  It's frustrating. It angers me! But I guess none of you who are ganging up on me ever felt anger, remorse, questioned why, questioned what was going, were scared, etc... like I am now. Clearly you are perfect and I'm a "3 year old", that you "feel sorry for", that "isn't ready", "needs a shrink" and whatever other mean & nasty stuff. Not cool. Much respect lost to those who are bashing.

Yes. I am angry and as have been repeated over and over again on this board "allow yourself to feel what you feel and don't judge it because we are all going to feel a rainbow of emotions." Well - I'm at angry now on the emotional rainbow.  5 years of preparing. I lost the 38 lbs since last November on my own before surgery. 17 more since surgery. The 17 lbs - yes, I'm happy about that. But I also recognize that it's not from "restriction" or anything other than being on a no-food, liquid diet. Yes, If I did go to McD's I would probably be in the hospital but I then again, yesterday I ate an entire meal including meat & 2 veggies with zero restriction so once my stomache heals I'm sure that if I choose I probably could go to McDs if I choose. I won't because I am committed but I don't feel the surgery has helped. Not yet.... The point is, it's me - not the surgery that's making this happen.

As I've stated I really hope & pray that it will start to work. That it will do what I have learned for the last 5 years it should do but so far it has been, in my experience, a failure and the only reason I have lost a pound is because of me - not the surgery. I hope that changes. I really do. But right now I feel completely and utterly let down. Like a fool who has been mislead.

Thank you sincerely from the bottom of my heart to those how gave suggestions on how to deal with it, possible solutions and words of hope. Much respect to those people. I'm clearly hurting and really needed that. Thank you.
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