I ate 4 Dairy Queen Buster Bars in 5 days...

 Noel, bravo on a great post. I bet hundreds if not thousands of us here on OH can relate to the behavior that you shared here. Most of us did not crawl up onto the operating table because we had a lifetime of excellent eating habits.  Disordered eating is a huge part of our society.  Last June I was in Washington DC. I was there just spending a weekend with a friend.  Once there we discovered that it was the 100th anniversary of the Girl Scouts.  They were everywhere in swarms. I was so sad to see that so many of the young girls were fat and many already morbidly obese for their size.  It really was amazing how many mothers were morbidly obese. I saw myself in them, just 30 months ago.

You are examining your choices and trying to understand your actions. Good for you! Without that, this can be a losing battle. Who we are always catches up with us unless we are willing to change. I go to Weigh****ches weekly, not for the food plan but to hear my leader remind me that it's always a mind/heart/stomach connection when it comes to why we eat or binge over situations. I also go because the scale there keeps me honest. It helps me examine why I make the food choices I do.

Youre on the most incredible journey of a lifetime. Revel in how awesome it is that you are learning why you make the food choices that you do. I won't read what negative people, and there probably will be some, have to say and I hope you won't either.  On my 5.5 mile hike this morning I'm going to ponder your self reflective post. Thank You!

FANTASTIC post! I have not really chimed in on the other threads because I have said it all before, I have tried to explain why for ME (and others) the behavior might be leading to dangerous waters, why I personally would not do it and why it might be worth it to analyze WHY the choice was made, even if it seemed like it was a conscious decision to "go off plan".

Why was it glorious? Why was it "deserved"? WHY was it NEEDED? What did it add to your day?
You can go back in my posts and see my watershed "garlic knot" moment, it is still something I revisit to keep myself from ending up back in that place. I refuse to cry over food anymore, I refuse to let it control me, and that is why when I feel like I NEED something I usually don't let myself have it, I walk away and prove that food does not own me anymore and that I will CHOOSE what goes in my body based on how it fuels me and what my BODY truly needs, not what my brain thinks it needs.

 This was a well thought out, and beautifully articulated post.  I applaud you Joy.  Thank you for sharing.

Thank you for the post.  It takes a lot courage to put your journey out there like that on a public forum.

Keep fighting the good fight!

I hear ya!  I have been struggling with slow weight loss and it sucks to know you are eating the right foods (and not much of them to boot) and not seeing the results.  I find that in these times of self doubt, I make poor choices.  Nothing huge, but still not specific to plan.  It's part of my addiction/self-destructive/self-loathing behavior.  It's the chicken & the egg for me; do I hate my fat self for being fat or am I fat because I hate my fat self.

But, getting back to this food thing.  I hear ya & understand your position.  If there were DQ Buster Bars in my freezer; I'd probably be eating one while I wrote this post!  I, like most everyone else on here, cannot have those items in my house.  I also think part of a Buster Bar is a choice, but a box is a slip-up.  I'm glad you are exploring the issue because I think that will lessen the chance it will occur in the future.

I come to this forum regularly for the information, insight, support and humor that it provides every day.  We are all going through something that others can relate to.  It's tough to hear the judgement from others, but I always think they are trying to help.  I also have had enough counseling to understand they may be saying to others what they would be saying to themselves in the same situation.  It's all good.  We all need help and support and acceptance.

I've rambled, but I really want to thank you for your opening up and allowing others to see they are not alone, that they are not complete successes every minute of every day.  Go forth and conquer -- you, and everyone else on here, deserve it!

Thanks for the post and thanks to all who commented including members of the royal court toga and all. I might be just overly giddy today but this made my morning for 2 reasons. One for the honesty of the initial post and secondly the ability for us to all laugh together through this struggle.

Thank you so much for sharing this.  I identified with your story on every level.  Even though I'm still pre-op, I think we're all here for the same reason:  support.  This was an awesome tribute to that.  Thanks again.

What a beautiful post.  Thank you for sharing it.  The truth is that even three plus years out I still can't keep good bread in the house.  I can't eat fresh bread in moderation, it is simply impossible for me to do.  I know this about myself and no longer expect myself to just deal with it.  Instead, I chose to never have fresh bread in the house.  Now that I am in maintenance, I will eat great bread if I am out at a restaurant that is especially known for their amazing bread, but I would not have done it during weight loss.  I am sharing this with you because I think it is important to show that we are all in this together.  I totally get you having to throw cupcakes away and putting salt on them, I have done similar things.  I have eating a large pizza by myself and so many many other things.  I get where you are coming from and in my posts I try to help you and others find meaningful ways to change our behaviors.  I also post what I most need to read myself.  I am not really VSG royalty, I am just one of the many people that broke free from a disease.

Just wondering, could some of us newbies be considered for Duke and Duchess of the prom court?

The mental work is the real work. Keep it up.