People feeling deceived

  Good for you.  Now that the cat's outta the bag, you won't have to agonize anymore about what people will think.  I believe many people feel shame that they've had to undergo surgery to address their weight issues and don't want others to know.  I can understand the view that it's a private issue, but I think it's more important to come out of the fat closet and wear your VSG/RNY proud.  

Good for you, Gwen.  I respect your honesty tremendously. 

Thanks.  I feel a huge sense of relief.  I've been so mellow since my Facebook post :D

LOL! Gwen, you are awesome :)

Thanks!

That's a great FB post.

I hope you get the kindness and support you deserve (and maybe inspire another). Part of my progress was 2 FB posts a friend was tagged in/commented on of a stranger I didn't know, but to see someone putting themselves out there and the warm response alleviated some of my misplaced shame and fear. 

Thank you!  The response has been overwhelming.  

Good for you Gwen.  It was a very courageous move...I'm proud you did it!

I actually was thinking about this very thing today when I told another person how I lost my weight.  I had this thought that if I had said "oh diet and exercise" I wouldn't be hurting myself so much as maybe not helping them.  There are three people I have met at different stages of my life.  One 25 years ago, one 20 years ago and one 5 years ago.  These complete strangers sharing their story with me is what put the seed of having surgery in my mind.  It wasn't the celebrities but these honest people that were struggling just like me. Having another overweight person come to me and say "How did you do it?" isn't just curiosity about me but them seeing a glimmer of hope that "if she can do it, then maybe I can too".  We are the testimony that gives others hope...at this stage of the game I am less worried about being judged and more concerned with helping others realize their dreams of living a healthy, fulfilled life.

I had feelings similar to Bufflehead's when I found out my daughter was pregnant for the first time. She wasn't married, and was 18 at the time, and she was afraid to tell her dad and me.  I didn't feel like I'd been lied to, but I did feel cheated out of the opportunity to support her during her pregnancy. My first grandchild, and my daughter felt like she couldn't tell us. That hurt too. Just another perspective. Just writing this is helping me decide whether to tell certain friends about my surgery, friends who have shown distaste when I told them I was thinking about it. 

~Jan

Absolutely love your eloquent FB post! I told everybody before surgery, what I was having done, with the exception of my daughter. She is in the military, and flew home in February to get married. Seeing me in her wedding pics was a wake up call. I sent payment for VSG the very next day. I have not told her because I want to surprise her when I fly to see her in October. My last goal is to walk off the plane and walk right past her without her recognizing me. I have my FB on lockdown, and all people have been instructed not to post anything about my looks. I'll break the news to the FB world (whi*****ludes family & friends that don't know) when I post a pic of my daughter & I set the airport in October. 

Congrats on your progress and your peace of mind!

Thank you!  I love your plan with your daughter, I can't wait to read all about her reaction!  

I didn't want to tell people pre-op, since I didn't want to deal with potential negativity.  Now I figure if people are negative, so what.  It's not like they can talk me out of anything.  ;)