What an idiot!

The guy sounded wonderful when we first started communicating (mature, world traveled, successful, and had a lot of common interests).  We talked a lot about things that are significant and important to us.  He knows about my gastric bypass and is really happy for me that I beat the diabetes and got healthy.  Last night I went on a first date with him. Over dinner, the conversation was....interesting.  Conversation is usually a two way street, but this guy was intent on hearing himself talk.  So much so, in fact, that every time I did get a word in edgewise, he asked me to repeat myself.  He simply wasn't interested enough to be an active listener in the conversation.  I was just sitting there as a captive audience for him to hear himself talk about how "wonderful" he is.  I hate that.  Strike one. As we sat over dinner, I couldn't help but notice how messy the table was becoming.  As I slowly picked at the chicken in my caesar salad, he was eating like a rottweiler.  The food was everywhere--on the plate, on the table, on the seat, on the floor.  Strike two. Then came the coup de grâce.  When I asked him about his longest relationship, he told me that he'd dated her for seven years, during which time she gained a lot of weight.  She wanted to move in with him, but he told her that she couldn't until she was no longer fat.  STRIKE THREE, YOU'RE OUT! As if that weren't enough, he had the gall to ask me what kind of birth control I used (which I told him was none of his damned business and then I added that birth control is a MUTUAL responsibility because I certainly didn't want to contract any of his herpes or genital warts, thank you very much!).   But wait!  There's more! On first dates, I conduct a little test of a man's social intelligence:  When the check comes, I reach for my wallet.  On at LEAST the first date, the GENTLEMAN should insist I not contribute to the tab.  Maybe this is old fashioned (and I truly don't mind my contributing once a relationship is established!) but this little dance tells me a lot about a man's values, respectfulness and social graces.  This moron actually let me pay part of the bill.

I thanked him.  He didn't know why, and I didn't tell him.  But he did me an enormous favor.  He let me check him off the list of men who will ever get anywhere near me ever again.

Good riddance!!

Bye Bye Baby

Baby, if it was YOU, we'd be having BREAKFAST together!

Good thing he is impressed with himself... maybe it is because he keeps HIMSELF company all the time.   Funny,  I use the very simular clue ins when I am out on a date.  Later I test men on their reaction to the disabled, and how they talk to my mom.  Very few past the test.  Those whom had past the test but did not move into romances have remained great friends through the years.  There is nothing wrong with old fasion values... it gives us a 'getting to know you ' time and keeps us from making BIG mistakes!  You avoided a trainwreck!!

I LOVE the way you handled that....good for you!

But he did me an enormous favor.  He let me check him off the list of men who will ever get anywhere near me ever again. I really like how you upheld your views and also not accepting less than you deserve! Good for you!!!  

Good for you, whats bad is he prob thought the date went well.  

You have to  a lot of frogs to find your prince, but I did-- and you will too!! I was on a first date at a fancy restaurant many years ago and my date blew his nose into the cloth napkin, AND he asked the waitress for the leftover bread in the basket to go!!! I wanted to scream for and was glad when that was over!

And the most important lesson here is: Women of ALL sizes encounter jerks.  Not just fat women.  So ladies out there - strike that one from your list