OT: Oh S$%T!

Subject:

Oh ****

Well it has happened.  I've been struck speechless by a 6 yr old. My daughter
and the neighbors lil girl, Emmy are good friends. They spend alot of time here
or over at Emmy's. Emmy's a sweet kid and I've no problems with this. Emmy's
lil cousin David, is Allison's age. He's there alot too. They all play together
pretty good. Today they've been in Emmy's kiddie pool and Allisons. The kids
just went home a few mins ago and I brought Allison in to give her a bath. She
came in and said Mom, lil David showed me his u know, down there. Well, I think
my mouth hit the floor. I was stunned there for a few seconds. Then I said,
sissy, that is not nice. Kids are not supposed to show each other their
"private" parts. She said I know mom, I learned that in school. So I said, well
if u know then why didn't u tell his mommy? She said, well he showed it to me.
I didn't ask him too! Ok, what in the world do u say in this situation? I know
it's a normal part of kids and that its going to happen. I'm not freaked out
about it. I told Adam and he busted out laughing. Yes, ha ha ha, she didn't
blurt it out to him like she did me. She didn't want daddy knowing.  Oh well, I
thought I'd share with u guys and see what u're intake on this situation is.
Kids will be kids but I made sure I told her that privates are private and u do
not show them, let ppl touch them, etc.
Hugs
Ange

I raised three boys so I feel for you.  Mine were probably one of those that showed..lol..just kidding.  It is really hard to raise kids but at least she came to you and told you.  Most little kids never say anything and then they wonder or try things.  So good for her.  Give her a big hug for me.  What a brave little girl.

I know I'm glad she told me, it just threw me lol.

I bet it did.  Your fun has just begun. 

If you were totally honest, wasn't there a day some little boy said I'll show you mine if you show me yours?  Assuming, these are little kids they are still learning about their bodies.  You did a good job of simply saying some things are private and let it drop.  Now, when she is 16 the answers will be much different!

I'm raising my nephew - I've had him for 5 years now (he's 10) - but when he was 6, he and the neighbor girl who was 4 were caught in her backyard by her mother naked in the playhouse.  The mother sent my boy home and from then on, treated him like a serial rapist.  He was not allowed to play at their house, and if his ball accidentally went over the wall - she would let him go get it but would be 2 inches behind him the whole time or glare at him til he came right back out.  Her father said it was no big deal and laughed - mom was making too big a deal about it.  I had completely apologized to her and made sure I told my boy that these were private areas and that you do not show them off - I didn't really know what to say as I was new at being a 'mother'.  A few days later - Dr. Phil had almost the exact same case on his show - 2 kids, hiding in the bathroom getting naked.  His response:  "this is DEFINITELY not sexual so don't put your lewd thoughts in their heads!"  He said you treat it like you would if they were climbing on the kitchen counters - you take them down, calmly tell them that 'we don't climb on the countertops' and go on with the day.  It is not a big deal and should not be treated as it (or they) are bad or dirty as it can cause issues later. Maybe it's a mom of a girl vs a mom of a boy thing - or just a man vs woman thing - but the little girl's father laughed and your husband laughed because this is what kids do - and especially boys.  I felt bad that my boy was made to feel like a rapist at 6 (though he didn't really understand why he was banished from his only real playmate)  - please don't do the same here.   My neighbors ended up moving away so it didn't continue - but I'd hate to find out how life would have been if they had stayed and continued to treat him this way.     

Be glad she told you.  I had a similar situation.  One day we were riding around in the car singing a song from a Winnie the Pooh video that dealt with strangers and similar situations.  My daughter blurted out that when she was next door playing with her friend (a girl) her brother wanted them to show him their private parts.  I told her it was good that she told me and after discussing it with her I let the mother know.  I was not upset  (and let the mother know that) because kids that age do these things but I did think it was my responsibility to make the mother aware that this was happening. 

At that age, I wouldn't really make an issue out of it. I'd just let it go. You said the right thing to her. :) I was about 5 or 6 when the little boy my mom used to babysit and I played "You show me yours, I'll show you mine" and I wasn't scarred for life. LOL  I will say, however, that when I was a teenager and moved to a new school and discovered this "little boy" in several of my classes, and he brought it up to me one day, that was a little awkward!  But no, we were good friends in school, and it was a funny joke between us. (And no, we never played that game again! haha) I still see his mom all the time because she works at my son's school... and it still makes me laugh.