What to do when the love of your life tells you you are too thin...

 We have a pretty open and honest relationship, and I do trust him to tell me the truth, but really at this point the truth as he sees it is that I have changed drastically and he thinks enough is enough. I do have some body image issues, always have but I am just not sure those are at play right now, maybe I should give my therapist a call, even if its just for a drive by "what do you think" kind of thing, get an outside opinion from someone who can see me in real life. 

 Is your husband overweight and feeling insecure that you are much smaller now? His feelings may also be based on how many years he has known you as obese. I asked my husband if he could picture me 100lbs smaller, and he said that he just couldn't because he has always known me as I am. My husband has never seen me in his eyes as being obese, and was totally attracted to me as I was, and also enjoyed the "extra cushion for the pushin", as another said.

Watching you change physically can be a huge adjustment for him, especially if it was very quick. You need to find out if he feels you are too thin, based on genuine concern for your health and well being, or is it centered around insecurity towards your new found looks, and self esteem. 

I do have to say, that men have a physical body preference, and this could be a factor in his concern too. My husband is fine with me losing weight but he is very concerned with me loosing in the chest. He will still love me no matter what I look like, this I know, but to be honest, loosing the breasts is a huge deal to him, along with the saggy skin. It is important to feel great about ourselves. We deserve it, but we have to acknowledge their concerns too. Try putting yourself in his shoes. How would you feel if you watched him, morph in front of your eyes. Perhaps he loses some of what you found attractive, or perhaps is better looking than before, which can lead to other complicated feelings. I suggest you have a heart to heart conversation with him, and it wouldn't hurt to remind him that you love him just the way he is. Chances are he may just need some time to get to used to the new you.

I guess I'd say be true to yourself, but give his honest input some serious consideration.

Brandilynn has a good point: what would make you like what you see in the mirror? For me, in clothes I do like how I look but out of them, nothing short of full body plastics would to do it. Honestly examine yourself and ask if you have a concrete achievable thing in mind that you want. Would firming achieve it, or just more weight loss?

My calves, for example, are still huge relative to my body. Always have been. But I can't spot lose on them and other parts honestly are too thin, so I've decided to just try to firm up my calves and proceed on with life. But that's me, and I'm not you.

Once you've mulled all this over, the final decision belongs to you, not him.

Honestly, i think if your BMI is in the "normal range" then it's fine. If you start to be technically underweight, then perhaps your husband has a point. If you are in a normal weight range, then I'm sure it's ok. Best wishes.

We struggle with this issue CONSTANTLY. I made the mistake of taking him to meet my surgeon since he was deployed during my revision. I was below goal, and my surgeon stressed to me how I didn't need to lose anymore weight and how if I gained a few pounds, he'd be happy. He honestly believes I am too thin at a normal BMI. I disagree 100%. I felt tag-teamed and a lot of "I told you so" were tossed around that day. BUT, I started hearing "you need to stop losing" when I weighed 175pounds and I'm only 5'2". I do admit that I have large bones/joints and I'm barrel-chested, but 125-130lbs is NOT underweight by any means.

I have zero solid advice for you. We still argue over it to this very day. When I got pregnant, gained weight, he was elated, he was even more elated and when I couldn't lose the last 10-12pounds he kept saying "YOU are still below where Dr. M says you should be." So, I am in a NO WIN situation with him. Now that I'm pregnant again, I'm back to hearing how much better I look with "meat on me" "with a few curves instead of being stick straight". Grant it, my husband always dated "thick" women, even in high school, he dated bigger girls, and he did fall in love and marry me at 270lbs. BUT, I simply refuse to NOT get back down to my maintenance weight. He still thinks I'm beautiful, and he tells me it's not about my "size" it's that I get obsessive about the scale, the pant sizes I'm able to wear, and that my surgeon doesn't want me below 140lbs. 10lbs shouldn't make a difference, but in his mind, his eyes, it's like 50lbs.

I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. I have major issues with it, and there is no amount of communication that has helped us. We've talked about, we've argued about it, I've shared the true, nitty gritty emotions behind why I feel best at 125-130lbs, but he constantly goes back to my surgeon's words.

Listen to everyone here, they are giving you great advice.  I also am heavier in my middle, an apple shape compared to most women, my arms, hips, butt, and legs seem thin and dispropoitionate compared to my torso, even if loose skin was gone.  I have not reached my initial goal yet, was 2 lbs away, then at 18 months I 've had 10 lbs. of regain that has remained steady.  So bounce back is for real, better to be prepared for it.  Looking gaunt, as with myself, seems quite normal when first losing.  Specifically my face looked very thin, but my body has redistributed what fat/muscle was left and even before my regain of 10 lbs, my face had slightly filled out again.