Help!!!

Here is a little guilt to go with the ass whoopin you got.  You now have a child, don't you think you owe it to him or her to be a healthy parent to see him or her through life?  You want to be around for your child.  Make that your inspiration.  It also sounds like you both got really comfortable with eachother and let yourselves go.  It happens to all of us.

 Wow . . that is rather soon to start having a major regain .. 

  It doesn't say on your avatar, but I assume you had RNY?  

  Although there appear to be situational factors responsible for the regain, you might want to look into a revision soon as well, if your pouch is in fact stretched out badly, possibly the Rose Procedure or even Stomaphyx (the former seems to work better, from what I've read on here).   You could also consider getting a revsion to DS ..  

  As to the wife, you guys should use the situation to turn into each others' best allies in the fight against regain, rather than a "mutuall-enabler", as appears to be the case at present, sadly.     Basically that amounts to you each being the other's "food police" and exercise "inspiration" ..          It's sorta the "united we stand, divided we fail"  philosophy!

  Good luck on whatever you decide ..

You might give this a try if you had a RNY and you are serious about getting back on track.  Good Luck.  This is from an article I read during my research.
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http://www.5daypouchtest.com/plan/theplan.html

Today I present a 5-day plan that I have developed and used to determine if my pouch is working and go back to that tight newbie feeling. And a bonus to this plan, it helps one get back to the basics of the weight loss surgery diet and it triggers weight loss. Also, it is not difficult to follow and if you are in a stage of carb-cycling it will break this pattern. Sounds pretty good, right? Here we go!

Days One & Two: Liquid Protein

The first two days are all liquids. You can have as many low-carb protein shakes as you like to satisfy hunger or cravings. In addition drink at least six 8-ounce glasses of water each day. The purpose of all liquids is to break any snacking, grazing or processed carbohydrate habits. In addition the liquids will work to cleanse your system and prepare you for the following three days. Try to reduce your caffeine intake as well, but do not stop caffeine cold turkey or you will feel sick and frustrated potentially losing the desire to continue with the pouch test.

If you notice symptoms of carbohydrate withdrawal you can eat a small piece of melon or an orange. You can also try a dose of Emergen-C which should reduce headache, dizziness or cramping from carbohydrate withdrawal.

The next three days you get to eat as much as you want as often as you want! Ahhh, but there's a catch: it has to be solid protein and you only get 15 minutes each time you sit down to eat.

Day 3: Soft Protein

Protein Recommendations: canned fish (tuna or salmon) mixed with lemon and seasoned with salt and pepper, eggs cooked as desired seasoned with salt pepper and/or salsa, fresh soft fish (tilapia, sole, orange roughy), baked or grilled, and lightly seasoned. This starts your program with "soft" protein. Measure your portion (1 cup volume or 4-6 ounces weight) and eat only until you feel full, not overfull. Remember, no water for 30 minutes before or after you meal, and no fluids with your meal. We are going back to the beginning and fluids will prevent you from feeling the pouch. If you need to add a bit of Miracle Whip or mayonnaise to the canned fish I understand, but keep it to a minimum so the meat is not too moist. One reason we lose the sense of tightness in our pouch is that we eat "slider foods" - foods that are too moist and do not stay in the pouch very long, they slide right through the stoma.

Day 4: Firm Protein

Protein Recommendations: ground meat (beef, turkey, lamb) cooked dry and lightly seasoned, shellfish, scallops, lobster steamed and seasoned only with lemon, salmon or halibut steaks, grilled and lightly seasoned. By now you should be experiencing that familiar tightness that will reassure you that your pouch is working. Remember to drink plenty of water between meals. Take some time to meditate and rediscover the wonder of your pouch. Often we do not like that uncomfortable tightness of the pouch, which is why we gradually move toward slider foods that don't make us uncomfortable. It is always my preference to eat moist protein so I do not get uncomfortable, but this allows me to consume more than I should. Rediscovering the pouch with this 5-day plan reminds me of how the tool really works. I hope by now you are rediscovering your tool and enjoying the hope and excitement because your pouch still works.

A word about constipation: A shift to high protein diet often results in constipation. To relieve this you may try adding a fibrous fruit snack to your morning and a fibrous vegetable snack in the afternoon. Fruit suggestions are apples, berries, apricots, cantaloupe or oranges. For vegetables try leafy greens, zucchini, cucumbers, spinach, summer squash or string beans.

Day 5: Solid Protein

Protein Recommendations: white meat poultry cooked dry and lightly seasoned, beef steak (if tolerated) grilled or broiled. Remember to chew chew chew. Measure your portion (4-6 ounces) and eat only until you feel your pouch tighten. Remember, only 15 minutes per meal, so you will have to work fast to chew your food completely. By now you should be out of any carb cycle you were in and perhaps you have lost a pound or two. You will have new confidence in your pouch and your ability to work the tool for your health and emotional well being.

Good luck! I believe you are going to like the results when you give this plan an honest try. Tomorrow I'll write about re-entry into a healthy eating plan that will allow you to take advantage of this pouch test and return to a weight loss surgery way of life.

Kaye Bailey © 2007 - All Rights Reserved

Robert,

You know what you need to do.  Get back to the basics.  You have probably stretched your stomach out, but you can also shrink it back to the post surgery size.   It's not the end of the world.  Go back on your pre-op diet and start over.  I certainly understand how life's changes can get you off track, but only you can be responsible for what you eat.  You should ask your girlfriend for support and see if she will go on this adventure with you.  She will, especially if she is wanting to lose some too.  It's not going to be nearly as easy as it used to be, but that is why you need to focus on it and post on here everyday if you have to.  I have been looking for this place for a week now and just ran across it, thank goodness. 

You can do it.  Focus on where you want to be and how to get there.  PM me if you need to, but you are the only one that can do it.

Like the guys have said, you need to get off your azz and get back on track right now!   Start over with your WL program and eating like you did when you were newly post-op. Also, start a food and exercise journal and track everything you eat and drink daily, as well as what exercise you do daily. That will give you a true picture of where you need to improve.  Make sure you are getting in your fluids daily. 

It ain't gonna be easy, but only you can do it.  It's your responsibility, with or without your girlfriend's help or blessings.
 
Now, GET TO WORK!!