Bingeing issues

I am new here, currently in the bigging stages of this process.  Actually,  I could have a RNY in just a couple of months.  My insurance has been super easy to get qualified and everything. I have been thinking this all through and I have a few things holding me up in making this big decision. First,  I am a binge eater. Emotional eater.  And I eat big, as in alot.  A big binge eater.   I can control myself for a few weeks then, shazam, the flood gates open and I'll eat like no tomarrow.  I am an all or nothing, black and white type person. Very mu*****ontrol or not at all.  On one hand, am I going to hurt myself with this surgery? I guess I cannot immagine not falling off the wagon and bingeing.  So, I'm afraid I'd physically hurt myself with overeating.  And, I like sweets. So, I see myself dumping.  And, what do I do with my emotions that are the trigger to all this bingeing ?    How do you "oldtimers" handle all this and has any classes your surgeon has for you or support groups helped?  Anyone relate ? I guess I'm pretty low, like this process has made me see all the times I've dieted and failed. Maybe I'm setting myself up for failure this time too.  I see this can be a tool to finally help get my like back, but I can't seem to even dream it can help me.

Hi, I was a major binge eater also, huge amounts of food at one sitting and it took a lot for me to get full, I would get pretty frantic eating trying to get full, and only until I was super stuffed did I finally stop and feel like I could relax. I have never wanted to binge eat since the surgery because you know that stuffed feeling you get after you are done with a big binge? Well I get that same stuffed feeling now post op if I go overboard and eat a whole cup of cottage cheese instead of 1/2 a cup. For me I was looking to get full, now I am full all the time. I'm sure everyone is different, but that's my story.

We were just discussing this on the WLS graduates forum.  I had an eating disorder before surgery and the binge mentality stuck with me afterwards too.  I binge about once a week now, but even at 5 years post op it's still WAY less food than I could have eaten before surgery.  I do sometimes eat so much that it hurts and my body gets sick.  Still, the surgery helps to control the quantity.  Counseling might help control the urge if it comes back.  Good luck. Angela

hey there.  I'm 4 months out and I still am a binge eater.  I will be an emotional binge eater until the day I die.  No two ways about it.  Its like a recovering alcoholic, I'm always going to be an addict.

The first 2 months were HORRIBLE.  Now I had more complications than most people, but what I seem to remember the most was going through "food withdrawals."  Yes, withdrawals.  Just like a heroin addict.  I would cry and I would get really sad, then I would get FURIOUS with myself for doing this to myself, with my surgeon, with my mother anyone that COULD eat what I wanted to eat.  But it eased.  IT was then that I realized just HOW horrible my addiction was.  and if you remember GI Joe, "Knowing is half the battle." :D 

The thing is, when I 'binge" now, its on beef jerky and its all of 1-2 oz cuz nothing else fits.  Or a glass of milk.  Or something healthy.  I've Lost the taste for the sweet stuff.  Seriously.  and Iwas teh BIGGEST bread/Sweets eater.  now its just TOO sweet.  even the Sugarfree stuff is too sweet.  Every now and then I'll have a chocolate soda (NSA cho**** cream with soda water).  super good.

But trust me, it will be DIFFICULT.  But you will get through it.  You'll hate it, but when you're on the otherside, its like looking at a completely different person. :D

Gosh, thanks,  guys.  I was getting a little intense there !  I see more and more I need something like this to help me be in control.  Thanks again.  Amie

Actually, thanks from me too....I'm a binge eater and still pre-op. An all or nothing, black or white kinda gal myself. Your replies have helped me alot, thank you!

My experience is similar to some of the other posts above.  I used to eat pretty normal but then (especially on weekends) i would get a big basket of chicken wings, steak fries, and fried mushrooms and eat until I couldn't eat anymore... usually almost ALL of the food order.  Binge eater big time. Some nights I would even drive out to the convenient store for something sweet like donuts.  SINCE surgery 2 months ago... I can't even imagine eating like that. My body simply WILL NOT let me eat much of anything!  I actually don't feel hungry and could go an entire day without eating anything at all, except for the fact that I KNOW I must eat some protein to stay healthy. So, I am getting into a good routine now.  Food was always there for me when I was lonely, and now...well, I am actually working more and socializing more to fill that time I used to spend alone and eating.  Sometimes I miss food.. I really miss being able to enjoy eating, but I know it will return some day.... only with better control over it.  This surgery is wonderful because it forced me to control my eating and confront my disease "Obesity".  Now, I see light ahead as I get healthier and stronger physically and emotionally.  Hugs, Elaine

Amie, Well you have hit my nail on the head. I too, am the world champion of binge eating. We're not talking an extra candy bar or too many fries. We're talking 2 or 3 value meals at McDonalds (with different drinks of course so it looks like I'm ordering for different people) or entire containers of donuts and candy and of course Little Debbie whatevers. God help me if I found a Hostess Thrift Store. But I made the decision to have RNY because I was binge eating myself into the grave. I was so sick and tired of being puppeteered by food and always feeling like I needed to binge to feel better when I was stressed out. Feel free to visit my profile to read a little part of my story. I think that the habit, yes habit, of binge eating is something that if you are willing to put a lot of hard work in to can be overcome. Now there will be times when I eat more than I should due to stress (come on I am only human!) but I decided that if I was going to go under the knife to have something done permanently inside me then I better be damn prepared to work on my food issues. WLS is by no means a magic pill that fixes all your food woes. There is counseling or support groups, and of course OH. We will always be there for you. One thing I have decided to participate in is a church based 12 step recovery group called "Celebrate Recovery". I have found great comfort and support dealing with very old food issues and if I want this weight loss to be permanent then I need to change my mindset permanently. Only through working through old issues can you really begin to heal IMHO.  Now on a side note, since I have had the surgery I have not had the desire to binge. Partly because I know I physically couldn't but mostly because I am learning I don't need to either. Not having the food available to binge on (because the pouch won't allow it) forces me to deal with my issues using other methods. Over the last 3 months my husband lost his job the day before my surgery so I knew I wouldn't have insurance if anything happened post-op. My 2 year olds B-Day was coming up and I didn't know if I would have $ to get any presents. We decide to purchase a home (put the bid in before hubby lost his job) and hoped hubby would get a job to purchase it. Hubby got a job and it was only a 1 month contract so we get in the house and now he's out of work again and we need to make the 1st months mortgage payment. How the heck is food going to help me through this? Truth is - it's not. So as much as I fret and worry no amount of sweet, salt, or crunch is going to make those things feel any better. But by dealing with these things and the fact that I am able to handle stress without foods makes me feel so strong! It is an amazing feeling.  It's going to take a lot of work to work on your binge eating sweetie. You've got to be ready for the fight of your life. But I know if I can do it, you can do it too. You just have to ask yourself if you have enough courage to stare that weakness in the eye and say this is my life and I am claiming it back.  I know you are stronger then you think - I have only complete faith in you. You can do this. Jen "Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway" - John Wayne