Ok everyone, let's have a frank discussion about regain...

"I always kind of thought that thin people were just naturally that way. And, a few of them are, but most of them work their asses off to be the size that they are... :O"

So true, I work with all 'normal' sized people and talked to them allot about how they stayed thin, almost every one of them said that they don't bring tempting foods in the house and most of them worked out at least 4 x's a week, and here I thought they we're naturally thin.....NOT!
BTW, have you ever read interviews with people who have lost allot of weight, no matter what way they lost it, the majority of them did the same thing, no temptations at home and lots of exercise, hmmmmmm I see a pattern there!

Edie

I love one of the teams I work with - most of them are young enough to be my daughter, and all of them are slender and athletic.  Since I started this journey, they've been wonderful about answering my questions about their lifestyles:  how much of this would you want?  how much would you eat? how much do you work out (and how hard is it to drag yourself to the gym regularly?

Meanwhile, they've been fascinated by my changing lifestyle, so it's a great exchange program!  I now feel better about my "wants" in food, but also stronger about saying "nope, not today."

And usually "not today" is all that I need, because tomorrow I'll want something else that I can "not today."  If I slip (and I'm human, I have and will), I stop the slip and get it back together. 

Maintenance is for life - whether we needed surgery to get there, or we were able to do it from the start.

well said Nick.  thanks for voicing all in a separate post.   OI also get annoyed when I see some post like that.  And - posts when people claim what weight they will be after the surgery.  We all know that our body dictates where we would end up and no matter how little or how much food you eat, how hard you exercise, once the body decided that it likes the weight - unless you are willing to starve yourself - you can't lose anymore...

I was all "I need to lose 30 more pounds" up until a few months ago. I was seeing this guy (well I was seeing a couple of guys...just dating...) and I told him of this desire and he said "you better not try to lose any more weight!" I asked why. He said "look at you. You've got everything a man could want--the chest, the nice round hips, the butt...you're a beautiful size. Not too skinny not nearly big..."

Why did I break up with him again? Can't remember...it was something...

Anyway, I then went and polled my "harem" (sadly I really do call them that IRL...) and it was a common sentiment! Go figure. Men (at least black men from my experience) don't like stick people!

So since I think I'm hot...they think I'm hot...why the hell am I killing myself trying to lose 30 lbs.

Now I kill myself to maintain. See...big difference.

"Now I kill myself to maintain. See...big difference."  

BTW: I wish i had some butt.  My pants just slide off. I have no waist. I get size small - and the legs are stretched and the butt is lose.  Guys do not like that.  Someone asked me if i planning to get the booty fixed... like getting implants or so.. I think not...
and the more I try to exerise the smaller the booty gets, but when i regain - it all goes to the front.  i hate being old.

HA!
I come from a long line of no booty women.  We get it all in the boobs.
When I lose more weight I will have to start wearing belts again or my pants will fall off!

:)
Holly

BTW they do sell but falsies, I know a crazy sentiment but what the heck if you can add hair, eyelashes, plump your lips, and increase breasts/cleavage, why not make a bigger booty?  I'm just saying!!!!

I was thinking about that... need to look at that.  but now I am broke... lol.  I need a little bit of a definision there...

In MY humble opinion:  I am a firm believer that if you think you are hot - that is 100% more sexy than a hot girl who thinks she needs to lose 30 lbs.

Regain terrifies me.  I haven't even lost it yet (only about 60lbs I think - no scale) and I am already worried about regain.  I am going through the phase where I want to comfort my annoyed pouch and make it feel better - with all the wrong things!  Every day I notice that I want to make it better with a chocolate shake or a bowl of creamy pasta - the two things that got me where I am at now.

And I tell my brain to shut up and look at my approved list again and try to figure out what to eat without getting sick.  And remind myself that I will be facing this every day of my life.  I need to learn how to block it out because one day I will be weak and (think) that shake WILL make me feel better.

As a total newbie - I think the arrogance comes from the big decision to cut ourselves in order to lose weight.  After making that decision, it is hard to imagine making the decision to eat it all up again. 

But I get what you are saying - it isn't a decision - it is a disease that if you don't address it head on, you will walk right back into it and it will creep back into your life. 

I am terrified of this possibility.  I have not started with a therapist but I am definitely thinking about it. 

Holly

Hey Nik! 

I guess it's all in the delivery - someone blocked me not long ago for "chiding" them about judging people who experience regain. You are much better with words.  I don't post much because for some reason I just can't get my point across in print.  Thank you for saying so eloquently what I was trying to say!