Sliding down the slippery slope, all hope lost?

Hi Guys

I am failing, I admit it. Flame me if you want, I probably deserve it :-(

I have done so well for the first half year but since 6 weeks my body is stalling and I know this happens, but it still is frustrating. it might have something to do with lack of exercise catching up with me, I am trying to fix that by starting a good gym routine. went 3 times this week and burned 900 cals each time. And I am doing a 4 evening-sport events with my boys this week, so activity wise I am trying to do it right!

But food wise... I started snacking on my holiday 6 weeks ago and never stopped. So while it is all sugarfree (cookies, ice cream and such) it is NOT nutricious foods I should be eating. I KNOW this full well but seem to be unable to stop. I HATE myself for this, because I was so smug in the beginning: I would always adhere to the rules and would NEVER stray or be tempted. My days of batteling food were over. NOT.

I eat about 1200 cals a day so still not enough to explain the stall but it just scares the hell out of me that I can eat 4 sugarfree cookies and that i WANT TO. I am having a really bad luck week and I find myzelf grabbing for food for comfort, just like the old binge days. I KNOW it is bad but I still do it and it scares the h*ll out of me. I keep having defaitist thoughts like: well this it it, end of your rainbow. See, you can never succeed, you arew failing yet AGAIN, your old habits are back and now you will just gain weight and be fat again. It makes me even more depressed than I already was this week.

I tend to be a all or nothing blakc or white thinker, like most obese people I guess. So I swung all the way tpo the negative now.

I know I need psych help so I am signing up for it at my program (it works differently over here) but I was hoping some one had gone through this (period of making bad choices) and got through it. Maybe someone has a tip, idea or encouraging word for me.

to be honest: it is all very different over here, I am trying to keep the american rules (very low carb, no sugar no alcohol no fizz etc) but I am the only one doing so over here. In my country the wls patients are told to eat what you like in moderation, just keep half an eye on protein. So they drink wine of they want to, eat bread and potatoes every day and have sugar when they want (and can handle it) So I AM trying to do the right thing by keeping USA rules but5 feel like a lone penguin in the desert

sorry for long rant!

Depressed cat who needs butt kicked

I really don't think you need your butt kicked. I think you need to embrace that you aren't perfect. No one is. NO one..got that..not one person.
Things that you are doing well with..going to the gym,
                                                                 moving with your kids
                                                                  knowing you are eating things that aren't great for you
                                                                  
Get rid of the things in your house that are calling your name. In my house that would be Oreo cookies. I can't even sleep if those thing are in the house.
Second, Know that the weight loss sloooows down. Embrace that because that's reality.
Remember..it's about living everyday..feeling successful every day. You did successful things today.
Deb T

 WELCOME TO THE REAL world, honey...we have all been there.
        I still don't exercise in a  prescrived manner ,and am 17 years post op.  
          just keep up with those  children, you'll  loose it, go for an  hour walk on  saturday with them.."helping mommy'..
              .keep changing your routine up, so you don't get bored
             and keep  bouncing your calorie intake up and down every two or three days by at least 200 calories, that will keep your  metabolism from getting stuck...
             Drink lots of water!
             Get in  your protein ... count your grams, try for what the surgeon  prescribed,
                  ,( if you don't have a target,  set one  in the 80-100 range, ....strive for it every day, before you have any treat...
              keep your sweets and special items just that... special  
              after you have been off so many carbs,...about three days... then  your craving of them will cease
       Try boosting  your B vitamins  to curb the cravings... i use a sublingual one, a complex with B 12 and 6 , vit c and folate in it...  
           Begin  again after every  fall....just get up...go for it again....
             Hope these tips help...

Your tool is still there, you just need to take advantage of it.  I find that really cutting carbs for a few days will reset my system and I won't crave them.  And there are things that I just can't have in the house.  When my DH wants sweets, he eats stuff I don't like and never have.  That way I'm not tempted.  Be sure you are getting 80-100g of protein which will help fill you up and if you use sweet shakes, help with some of the need for sweets without the carbs.  I have a hot chocolate protein everynight before bed.  Before surgery, it would be a bowl of ice cream.
You can do this.  Get back on the wagon and restart the journey.  Get your help also if it is availble. 

I've been on the slippery slope. A 10 lb gain got my attention! I started C25K running progrm and love it. Get rid of all those temptations and find a better alternative. Grrek yogurt with flavored syrups or protein ice cream.

You can do this!!!

Hope is never lost.

It sounds like you are doing the right thing: hooking up with a therapist and doing some solid introspection to figure out what's going on in your head. The catastrophic thinking involved in a black or white approach is very destructive. You need to find a way of dealing with yourself compassionately. A person constantly waging war with themself never, ever finds peace.

Get thee to Amazon.com and buy a copy of Women, Food, and God by Geneen Roth. While the name of the book is misleading (it's not specific to women and has little to do with God) it is exactly what you need right now to start you help to evolve your thinking.

Hoping the best for you,

~Mo

I can't add anything that hasn't already been said but hugs to you!

Yes most of us have been there. I suck at moderation too. I drink a lot of hot tea. That is my answer to everything and no, it doesn't always work!

Just don't get into the "stinking thinking" OK? Every minute is a new chance to just say no to crap. Don't think well I"ve already screwed up might as well have another chip

You are doing awesome on the exercise and you are making steps to get counseling.

You can do this. Eating healthy and staying healthy, a lifelong goal! xoxo

All hope is not lost, remember you're in charge!  Take back your power.   I agree with everyone who has posted and especially Deb T and her kind words.  You are doing a lot of things right-worried about your food choices, moving with your kids, exercising at the gym, getting help.  I think the hardest thing is when we start the self-loathing.  I don't know about you but I am sick of feeling like a failure, so let's not.  I know for myself, nothing has worked for me so far (diets), so WLS probably isn't even going to work for me...self-fulfilling prophecy.  like people have said here, you are doing a lot of things right and you are trying to figure out how to get yourself back on track.  It really is the stinking thinking and those negative self-defeating, self-loathing messages we give ourself.  Let's agree to not do that anymore.  I do it but now-much less.  When I find myself doing that I ask myself how would I speak to a friend that got off track.  I would speak to them with love and understanding.  so let's do that...keep up the good work and do get someone to talk to-keep posting and reading here-we all need someone like-minded to bounce things/feelings off of.  A therapist can give you some ideas on how to handle emotions cropping up without eating for comfort or maybe you eat a lot less.  You do the best you can.  Good luck and I will be thinking of you.

No flaming, no butt kicking.  Stop the negative tapes in your head and be kind to yourself.  The carbs are addicting, the more you have the more you want.  Time to refocus on your choices and prepare with protein choices.  You CAN do this!

I'm sure the different culture and food choices make it a challenge.  Don't deprive yourself of an "occasional" treat unless it triggers more "occasional" treats.

Food is food, not good not bad, just fuel for the body.  Choices of healthier food fuel the body the best.

Breathe and focus!  This is a never-ending journey.

IF YOU ARE WANTING HELP AND WANT TO LOSE ,THEN YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE. IT'S HARD WHEN ALL YOU PEERS ARE NOT ON THE SAME MIND SET AS  YOU .  SO THE ONLY THING I CAN SUGGEST DIFFERENT THAN ALL THE ABOVE IS: REPEAT TO YOURSELF SEVERAL TIMES A DAY-----"I AM A FAT BURNING MACHINE AND I WILL BE HEALTHY AND HAPPY". I AM A SLOW LOSER--ALWAYS HAVE BEEN. SO WHEN I AM DISCOURAGED. I SAY THE ABOVE SNETENCE AND IT DOES HELP ME. I WOULD ALSO LIKE TO SAY YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. WHEN I WAS IN HOLLAND IN THE EARLY 70'S, I SAW BEAUTIFUL SLIM GIRLS WITH PEACHES AND CREAM SKIN RIDING SCOOTERS. I CAN PICTURE YOU RIDING THAT SCOOTER.  JOY