I don't remember asking for your opinion

 I ususaly don't post mid day as I am a teacher and I have students and I am very busy all day, but I am so pissed off right now I need to vent!

At lunch today I had a teacher friend tell me that another teacher told her that I need to stop losing weight, that I am too thin and I am just starting to look sick. (I am 160lbs, no where near too thin) To my face she tells me how nice I look.  I honestly think that she is jealous because I now can wear the same size as she can.  Thin people are all for us big girls losing weight, until we get thinner then they are.  Then the claws come out.

Then, right after lunch, I saw a friend (or so I thought) and ask him why I had not seen him in the lunch room for the past few weeks (about 2 weeks now).  He said he doesn't want to come to lunch with me because I drink a shake for lunch and I am already so thin and it is just shoving it in his face that he is large and he eats his lunch and I just drink mine.  REALLY!  REALLY??!! So I can't even have a protein shake for lunch because it makes other people feel uncomfortable.  Really?  He is very heavy, and I think he is insecure because other people NOT ME have mentioned to him that he should have surgery.  I do not even discuss my WL or my surgery at lunch because not everyone I work with even knows I had it done.  

I knew that losing massive amounts of weight was going to change my life and I also knew it was going to change the way people treat me, I just never thought this was going to happen.

I am getting this comment often though, you need to stop losing weight, you are getting too thin.  But I totally do not agree.  I am thin I guess, but not too thin AND i need to take off 10lbs more then I want to account for bounce back.  Even my sister told me I was getting to thin and it was making me look old.

I DON"T REMEMBER ASKING ANYONE FOR THIER OPINION IN THIS MATTER!

Thanks for letting me vent.

I'm going to chime in on your venting...and agree with you completely.  Yes, it is THEIR insecurities and quite frankly their problem.  Even my parents treat me differently - at my heaviest they were almost to the point of being cold to me.  I was telling my mom a few weeks ago how people at work are treating me differently.  I told her it kinda hurts because I'm still the same person.  She told me I wasn't the same person because now I've lost all this weight I'm better now.  WTF?  I told her, no, I am still the same person - still feel the same on the inside...really really frustrating and hurtful.  The sad part is they really don't realize they are doing it...

I also noticed the other day at the conveneint store (where I stop for my morning coffee), men were actually holding the door open for me.  At our last all employee meeting a guy gave up his chair...I'm treated now with respect and seen by men.  While this is flattering at the same time six months ago I was an invisible fat piece of crap that didn't deserve a door or seat to be given up for?  People suck...

 My mom has been very supportive which is nice cause that is not always her thing, to be supportive.  She likes to show me off to people which I think is sort of funny.

She thought about getting the surgery done too since she battles her weight and had a stroke and really needs to keep her HBP in control.  She started a diet called medfast and now she often makes comments about the RNY that are a bit offensive like "taking the easy way" and that crap.

Whatever, easy way or not it was the right way.

I think, just to really **** people off, I am going to lose 30 more lbs, so you can see my bones and then wear really tight cloths and wear white makeup and red lip stick and then see what people say.  Oh how funny that would be~!

 OMG ... I thought I was the only person in the entire world who even noticed the door opening thing.  I once took my infant grandson to the mall and was almost in tears after a man RAN to the door to open it for a young, attractive woman a few steps in front of me and they both let it slam in my face and let me stand there struggling to get a stroller through the doors.  At that moment, I wanted to kill someone.

Before I retired, I was an administrative assistant. I was not UNattractive, just overweight. I had to attend all the manager meetings, which were mostly attended by men.  Although I was treated with respect, it always irritated me to the bone when a young woman would come to a meeting and suddenly every man in the room, without exception, would suddenly become witty and charming, sitting up straighter and hovering, wanting to know if she wanted coffee, water, needed a pen, etc.  I've also witnessed it the other way around, when a young, attractive male comes into an office where there are mostly females and the women do the same thing.  

It makes me angry that so many people are so shallow, but, I guess the worst thing about being overweight is that you are invisible, like when the man saw the perfectly capable woman and was Johnny on the spot to open the door for her, and yet neither of them saw a woman struggling to get a baby through those same doors, even though he had to run past me to get to the young lady.

 Vent away! And remember that those opinions/issues are theirs, not yours, to shoulder!

Lisa,
I completely understand.  I had about this same vent yesterday.  We are just going to smile and as one poster told me say "Bless their hearts!"  I'm not sure where you are from but in the south that politely means go f*** yourself!  LOL  Enjoy your new body and your new size.  Just smile and say "Thank you, yes I am getting thinner every day..it's a hardship but I'm making it just fine. Thanks for your concern in a matter that is absolutely NONE of your business."

I am a teacher, too. The best thing I ever did was find a new school to work at after I got to goal. People here know me at this weight and I blend in. I love that.

Laura

 Funny I was thinking of doing that exact thing next school year. It is time for change anyway.  Thanks for reading and responding.  Venting made me feel so much better!

 *Like*

Wow, that sucks you guys. I've just started to get comments on people noticing my loss. So far so good. When I was skinny in the past I had people tell me I looked sick and too thin....I was maybe 155 and my lowest size was a ten. Isn't that average now? Hang in there people!