Conflicting info....advice please

I have been keeping a food journel, my trainer requested it. He also stated that I need to get some carbs but to get COMPLEX carbs such as whole wheat and such and not simple carbs. My trainer has worked with WLS patients but did tell me not to do anything that I shouldnt be doing and that he agreed with the protein since we want to build Lean Body Mass as well as lose weight. His main focus is to lower my body fat % not just the scale #.

 I'm sorry but after waiting and researching the gastric bypass for nine years before getting it every Dr said you have to eat because you cant get hungry. If I only ate when hungry I would be dead now. At 15 months out I still have zero hunger reflex, I set my phone alarms to remind me to eat and when I ignore them I pass out and get a shame on you from my Dr. I eat 3 meals and 2 snacks a day. Sometimes my protein shake is a meal sometimes a snack. My Dr's protein requirements have been 70gr min since day one and now I'm up to 100 a day to maintain my levels. I average 1000 cals a day now and still losing.

 I think I would reluctant to take all my nutritional advice from a trainer. That's really not their expertise.
I would rely on your doctor and your nutritionist.
350 calories a day is not enough.
Deb T.

 In my opinion all you have is yourself to rely on! Do research and take advice from your doctor and your trainer but ultimately you have to decide what is best for you.  You can't NOT eat that's absurd I didn't feel hunger for months I would have died if I listed to that rule.    I didn't look to see when you had your surgery but at the beginning I was getting in 300-400 calories, then at about 3 months 500-600 calories then at 5 months 800 calories then at 7 months 1000 calories and then at 9 I moved up to 1200 calories.. now at almost 1 yr out I'm starting to push towards 1500 calories.  You need to keep your metabolism up by eating small amounts frequently. Also if you eat a really low calorie base then when you are at goal you will have to maintain at a low calorie which will suck and be hard to do.  The goal (for me anyway) is to be able to lose weight with the most calories possible so I'm better off at goal.  I eat about every 3-4 hours Typical day for me is
Bfast-protein bar
snack-almonds
lunch-protein bar or soup (yes I'm boring LOL)
snack-beef jerky
Dinner- 3 oz protein and a 1/2 cup veggie or salad
Snack-Click protein Drink
Snack- peanut butter and fruit, yogurt, cheese, nuts OR the occasional cookie! =)

good luck to you!

This is a bit of a conundrum.  On one hand, when I was 6 weeks out if I only ate when I was hungry I would have never eaten either.  But on the other hand, I was lucky to get in 600-700 calories a day at that point.  So on those days closer to 800 calories I really don't think you are that far off of the mark. 

At this early stage of the game, I am going to come down on the side of your surgeon.  You don't want them having a "you didn't follow the plan" attitude if (heaven forbid) you were to have some issues arise. 

As you get further out and can eat more things, larger quantity of those things, and (If) your hunger sensations return you will start picking up more calories without trying.    

Based on what you have posted I think the following things need to be pointed out..

1.  Your doctor said only eat when you are hungry because he (incorrectly) thought you were eating too much and had a weight gain (which was water weight from low potassium).  His instructions to "eat when only hungry" were not given in a vacuum and should not be followed as such.  If you do not feel hunger, that does not mean only eat once a day.  That means you eat 3x a day MINIMUM to get a MINIMUM amount of calories, protein, fat and carbs to sustain you.  Now what's a minimum amount of calories, fat, carbs, and protein to sustain you depends on what your plan is. 

2.  Your trainer is right...if you don't eat, you won't have fuel to workout properly.  BUT, at 5 weeks out, there is only so much you can eat so you have to take that advice with a grain of salt also because you're not operating in a vacuum.  I can tell you this...as someone that also works out with a trainer, there is no way I could safely do my workouts eating 300 calories and 40g of protein.  Your body needs about 10-15 grams of protein immediately after a workout just to rebuild the muscle that your workout "tore up" to heal and prevent injury.  If you are only eating 300 calories, you will injury yourself if you are doing ANY kind of weight or resistance training and that includes using your own body weight.

Here is my advice (and I'm not a MD nor do I play one on TV) based on having walked in your shoes before....

1.  I'd hold off on the personal training for now.   At 4-5 weeks out, its kinda early and pointless and starting out with a trainer that early isn't going to help you tone up any faster (and it won't prevent lose skin either).  I personally waited until I was about 3-4 months out before I started working with a trainer.  The reason I suggest waiting is because you are not consuming enough calories to prevent injury (your trainer is right) and at 4-5 weeks out it will be hard to get to a point where you ARE consuming enough calories.  If you can't place the personal training on hold because of a contract or something, I'd try to stick to mostly cardio and I wouldn't do any weights or resistance for a while.

2.  Eat on a schedule.  For the first 4-5 months (I'm at Month 6)...I never felt hunger and could go all day without eating.  Even if all you eat is B, L, D, start there.  If you don't feed your body, it will go into starvation mode...and it will hold on to every single calorie for its dear life.  You will experience longer and harder stalls and most importantly, you run the risk of messing up your metabolism once you are in maintenance phase. Eat.  Even if you are not hungry...EAT.  The "eat when hungry" instructions apply for snacks and "other" meals outside of the main 3.  Not hungry at snack time...then skip it, but do NOT skip your main meals....your body needs those.

Many of us don't get hunger pains =ever. You have to eat if you're working out. YOur body will take what it needs, and that means muscle to survive if you don't give it enough. YOu don't want to lose the muscle tissue you're building and you don't want heart problems - your heart is a muscle and your body doesn't know the difference. You have to eat - you need protein forward or only meals. You need lots of water - more than the recommended amount if you're working out, you need a protein "fix" sometimes if your workout exceeds the amount of food stores you have on hand. You won't lose properly if you don't feed yourself. Your trainer is right - you need to eat - you need to eat portions and foods that are right for post op patients, you need to get in the right amount of nutrients and calories. Work with your trainer, Your doc probably meant don't eat between meals if you're not hungry. No doc worth their salt is going to tell a patient not to eat.
Hunger pains don't come back in most of us - we eat by the clock. Make sure you get in your 3 meals a day and a snack if you're working out. Protein is the way to go. Eat just before or just after a workout to keep from getting rebound hypoglycemia. Your body will tell you what it needs but you need to listen to it and learn what you need when. Make sure you're getting in enough protein and water =those are the most important. Your trainer may be able to tailor a meal plan along with your post op diet you're on now. We need to eat 3 meals a day and a snack if we're active. We can have serious complications if we don't. Working out only increases the amounts we need. Find out what your nutritional need are and meet them to be successful.
Jen 10 yrs post op RNY and very physically active so I know what you mean.

You were in the hospital and gained weight.  They probably pumped you full of IV liquids.  Your doctor did not understand that?  I came home from having WLS 20 lbs. heavier than I went in and I surely was not overeating!!!

You are not eating enough.  350 is not enough especially with working out.  Your body will go into starvation mode.  Eat 4-6 small meals a day.  Measure your food and eat what you are allowed.  Eat protein.  40 g. is not enough protein.  Drink protein drinks in between.

 If you are never hungry you CLEARLY cannot only eat when hungry since that would mean never eating.  I never got my physical hunger sensation back (even after 4.5 years), so I still do what I did early out: I eat by the clock (which has the additional advantage of keeping your metabolism up throughout the day instead of going up and down.  You DO need to get in enough calories, though... if you do not, you will be sabotaging your weight loss both now and potentially in the future because your body will drop your metabolic rate in response to what it perceives as starvation (and that may increase your risk for being one of the people whose metabolism is permanently lowered after RNY or may cause it to be permanently lowered MORE than if you had been getting enough calories).

Lora