Even if it's true, it still hurts sometimes

Kelly,

When I read this I had to stop and go have a good cry because it brought up so much pain for me.

Does there ever become a time when we stop thinking we are not good enough?  Not pretty enough.  Not smart enough.  Not thin enough.

Will there ever actually be a time where we are simply... enough???

Sending you hugs. 

Hi Kelly, I have a question for you. I was wondering if "early" in your relationship, did he ever compliment you? Told you he thought you were beautiful? If he did, then I think he's being a total jerk! If he has never has done those things, maybe he's always been clueless and you didn't let it bother you before because you were happy with your relationship.

You don't have to answer here, my question was more for you to think about.

I also get the sense that he may be a little out of touch socially.You deserve to have a close intimate and loving relationship.Let it hurt as it should and pick yourself back up.

I am so sorry Kelly. You deserve nothing but pure love and happiness in your life.

aw, i'm sorry that's not right.. if it means anything i think your a beautiful woman! and your filled with so much knowledge! (major plus, because men arent that reliable lol) any man would be LUCKY to have you!

hi Kelly
Just one more voice to that mix.... you deserve so much better. You are on your way to that better now - and this is just an unfortunate pitstop :( You give so much to everyone here and I am sure that's true in your real life too.

sending big virtual hugs and thanks for all you give to us newbies!

maureen

Kelly, I'm so sorry to hear about this. I would be hurt too if somone said that to me especially someone I was with as long as you have been. He sucks for not saying you have pretty eyes or returning the compliment in some form. There's a lot he could have said other than commenting about whether your shirt matches your eyes. You are beautiful inside and out despite what you perceive as flaws - no one is perfect and these things are what make you the unique person you are. He was extremely insensitive and you didnt need to hear that. You are valued and loveable and you have to realize that. Hugs!

 
Okay, Kelly, listen up:

1.  Don't EVER say you are not pretty. . .that is far from the truth looking at your pics.  I get you may      "feel" that way, but for all of us here on the outside looking in, you are a lovely lady and you      
      ARE attractive even if you may "feel" that you are not......(you caught that theme did you not?)
2.  I would kill to have skin as nice as yours. 
3.  You have my pre-tummy tuck waist/shape. . . I'm boxy now, not much of a waist so I am
      knashing my teeth over here in jealousy.
4.  Your ex seems to be totally clueless, do NOT take his behavior/lack of social skills, to mean
      that there is anything wrong with YOU! 
5.  You have gotten some great responses and perspectives on here.  Go back and re-read
      them, especially the ones where we are telling you how awesome you are, because you
      REALLY are!!!!
6.  And since I can't really add anything more prolific,  . . . .{{{hugs}}} from your OH peeps who
     care and see your beauty shine through on a daily basis! 

This guy is not your soul mate and you've wasted enough of yourself on him.  I doubt that most of us are in the relationships we are based on a beauty meter.   And, most of the very popular people that I know will never win a beauty contest but they are so beautiful on the inside and fun to be around that others flock to them.  Thus, I think most of us gravitate to what the person is made of.  I wonder if you've felt "less than" in this area for so long that you honestly do believe what you write when there is no reason for you to lack self confidence in this area.  You need to strutt your stuff and show the world what you are made of.  You'll attract what you deserve and you deserve 100xs better lady!

So leave this guy behind and get out and start living your best life girlfriend!

BIG HUGS

 Kelly, I'm so sorry you're feeling this way.  I literally just got home after a full work day plus two psych evals, so I am bordering on physical and mental exhaustion, but I wanted to tell you that I am thinking of you and I will send you a PM later.  You have SO much to offer someone in a relationship and I'm sorry that he is not "it".

Hugs (if you want them),
Lora