OT - feeling really discouraged about service dog

I think some of you know I've been hoping to get a service dog to help me with my PTSD and other issues.  There is a particular program that trains and places service dogs that I was hoping to work with but there have been a few things about this program that have been like red flags to me.  Today I spoke with one of the trainers from the program and some stuff she said to me just doesn't sound right at all and doesn't fit with all the research I've done.  There is a forum for people with service dogs and I posted about it there to get some feedback from others that have gotten service dogs from different programs and they pretty  much confirmed what I was thinking, which is that the people at this program don't seem to know what they are doing.

I'm really disappointed because I was really hoping things would work out with this program.  For various reason, it's the only program I've been able to find that might have been an option for me.  And you know how I do tons of research.  So my only other option is to adopt a dog and work with a professional trainer to train the dog as a service dog, which would be expensive and take a while.  However, before I started talking to the people with this service dog program, I had submitted an application to a dog rescue because that's what I thought I was going to need to do.  I didn't hear back from them so after about a month I emailed them and asked what was up and was told someone would be in touch with me really soon.  That was two weeks ago and no one has been in touch.  So apparently I will not be getting a dog from that rescue.

Of course, there are other rescues.  But I feel really discouraged.  I know I'm over generalizing but it feels like nothing ever works out the way I want it to and it feels like I am never going to get a dog.  There is another rescue I plan to apply to and I'll probably do that tomorrow, when I will probably be feeling a bit less pessimistic.  But I am really discouraged right now.

I know this is not nearly the same but both could have such a positive impact on our lives...in this long journey to find a job...my hubby has always told me not to pray for a job but to pray for a job that was right for me....which is so true and I hope all this works out for you....maybe God is waiting for the right puppy to put in your home.   Hang in there! You mean so much to all of us!   Sherry

Hang in there!   I can imagine how discouraged you feel but I think things do happen for a reason.  I think that maybe there is a particular doggie that is meant to be yours and that it will happen soon! The stars just haven't aligned right quite yet.   What a lucky doggie he or she will be!  

 
Sorry to hear you're having problems getting a service dog . . . .I can empathize as I have been looking for a service dog for my kids.  It would actually have to be a multi-purpose service dog as I was told it is unlikely I could get each kid their own dog even though they have very different medical issues.  

Just don't give up, you will find the right dog for you though it may unfortunately take a while!!!  

Who told you it would be unlikely that you could get your kids their own service dogs?  From what I've read, it's really inadvisable to try to train one dog for more than one person.  That would be double the work load on the dog which could create a lot of stress for the dog, plus whose needs would the dog put first?  What if both kids needed something from the dog at the same time?

 
Hi Kelly,

I had two separate Service Dog agencies in PA tell me that due to the high demand for service dogs, it would be unlikely that both kids would get their own dog.   The wait would be anywhere from 1-5 years for the dog, so my best bet would be to get one "multi-purpose" service dog that they would select, and both kids could utilize.

You are asking exactly what I did and I was told that many dogs are cross-trained in multiple areas and that this was a common practice.  I was also told it would be up to me to determine which child had greatest need of the dog on a daily basis. 

The other issue I am running into is that not many agencies want to work with kids under 18. Most of the places that I looked into only want to work with adults.  My kids are 15 and 13.

Obviously, I didn't go with either one of these places.  I found a place (though I can't remember the name at the moment) in the midwest that WILL work with the kids and where I can put each kid on the waiting list individually for a dog.  Again, I was told the average time on the waiting list is 1-5 years.   

My other option is to adopt two dogs, have them pass the required "personality" testing and than have a trainer train the dogs for my kids' specific needs.  

I'm not sure what I am going to do at this point.  

No words of wisdom, but just wanted to say that I really understand your statement "I feel really discouraged... {snip}...  it feels like nothing ever works out the way I want it to and it feels like I am never going to get a dog."  I know that most people don't understand how incredibly discouraging it can be to try to do something to combat the PTSD and then have it not work out or be delayed, but I definitely "get it".  (I have had several people comment on how they don't understand why having to wait an extra couple of months for a puppy to replace Khan is a big deal.)

I'm sorry things did not work out with the program or the first rescue and you're feeling so discouraged tonight. I hope you feel better soon.

Lora

I knew you would get that.  I almost PM'd you because I knew you'd get it.

And it makes perfect sense to me that having to wait a couple extra months for a puppy is a big deal.  You're ready now, you would feel much better with the puppy, and the breeder told you the next one would be yours and now says there are a couple other people in front of you so she's not following through with what she promised.

And there is this feeling of urgency for me because hey, I finally have hope that there is something else I can try that might help with the PTSD, after two million things I've tried that didn't help or didn't help enough.  And there is so much stress in my life right now with my relationship ending and stuff that I want something to help and something to hold on to.  And a lot of my symptoms have been so much worse lately and I don't have any other ideas of what to do to help.  So I feel desparate and while I know logically that this doesn't mean it will never happen, it might just mean it will take a little longer, a little longer feels like forever at this moment.

Yes, "a little longer feels like forever".  Yes.  Finding something that you are sure will help with the PTSD -- when SO MANY things don't -- and then not being able to get it (or losing it right away) is very distressing.  It is sort of like a kick in the gut from the universe.

That is part of what is fueling my current depression.  I finally realized that having a true guard dog would make me feel so much safer living alone, so I waited 10 months to get Khan, and after about a year he got to the point where his guarding instincts and behaviors had fully kicked in and I was actually starting to feel SAFE here after dusk (instead of just managing the anxiety), only to be forced to have him put down at about 20 minths old because of his hips... and now, with Khan gone, the fear/anxiety is worse than it was before I got him... and here I sit waiting for a THIRD red male puppy to be born, knowing that it will take a year before he is old enough that I will really get back that sense of safety.

Logic and PTSD are like oil and water. You are determined and quite skilled at researching, so I am confident that you will find a way to get the service dog you need... but I know that doesn't really offer any comfort right now.  Hang in there.  Let me know if there is anything I can do to help.

Lora

I imagine it's worse for you, since you had Khan and lost him.  Well, really, I'm sure it is, I don't have to imagine.  I know how hard it can be to lose a pet anyway, and on top of that, to have had that feeling of safety and feel like it was taken away, is worse than just having to wait to get it in the first place.

Thanks for understanding.  Sometimes it helps a lot just for someone to get it.