Starting to suffer from depression

I had surgery over 2 months ago and I hate to say I still regret this surgery. I am starting to become depressed.  I am happy in 2 months I lost 49 pounds but in general I am not happy. I am starting not to care anymore. I don't really care if I eat. I don't really care If I drink. I don't really care about anything anymore. Lately I have became a lump on the couch, I don't do anything, don't wanna go anywhere, just wanna sit on the couch and do nothing. I have an almost 3yr old who wants to do things, but I don't. I feel really bad because I have stopped playing with him, I have stopped doing things with him. Before this surgery I was a happy go lucky person, loved being with my son, loved playing with my son, loved being around him. Before this surgery I was never a depressed person, just unhappy about being overweight but never depressed. Before this surgery I use to like to go places and just leave the house for no reason. I wasn't eating because I was sad or depressed, I was eating because the food was there. I have started seeing a therapist and all he ever asks me "how are you feeling?" Honestly, I am regretful, depressed, unhappy, ect... Like I said I am happy I lost 49 pounds but I am depressed. I am starting to get tired of everything this surgery comes with. I am tired of the nausea, i am tired of getting sick because certain foods don't agree,  I am getting tired of being tired, I am tired of having no energy, I am tired of forcing myself to make sure I am taking all the protein and vitamins and ect.... I am just tired of how these last 2 months have been. I have had to have my gall-bladder removed. I keep getting back to back kidney stones. I am tired of the pain. I am just tired of doing this in general. I feel like crap all the time.  I just wanna go back to feeling like my old self. I am missing out on my almost 3yr old and I don't want to because I am depressed and don't want to get out of bed. I feel bad for my mom, she has been doing it all.  I think this is the end journey for me. I think it's time to tell my sturgeon the truth and tell him, i'm finished.

 

Good luck to the rest of you on your journey. Hope you reach your goal. But Monday morning, I am calling my doctor. I finished. Being depressed isn't the way I want to live my life. I have a long life ahead of me and I am only 21.  I am deleting my account.

 

Tabbie

Please don't give up. We're all here for you.

Depression is a medical issue and you are right to see your doctor. It can be fixed! I think we expect weight loss to solve all of our problems (and definitely not create new ones!) but there are bumps along the road. I hope you find the support you need.

Don't give up!  You are only two months out.  It takes time to adjust to the new routine.  If you are nauseous... call your doctor.  There are things that you can take to help.  If you are tired..make sure your lab numbers are good.  You have to be your own health care advocate.  When you signed up for this surgery you knew it was going to take commitment.  You knew that you would have to feed your body a certain way to succeed.  I know it seems overwhelming right now...but I promise it does get easier.  Once you have a routine down, it becomes second nature.  You don't want to give up on becoming healthy.  That three year old needs a mom that will be there for him.  If you remain obese...really... how long will you be here?  Right now your hormones are raging in your body, caused by the rapid weight loss.  Don't let hormones cloud your judgment.  Work through this.  I think most of us go through a "mourning period" after WLS ...and depression is part of that process.  We have had to say goodbye to our best friend ...food.  Take one step at a time.  Make it your goal to get up and do things.  This website will be a blessing to you if you listen to people and keep an open dialog.  Stick areound...we're here to help you!

Just like we said in your last post...you know what you have to do and yet you refuse to adhere to your docs program. We all have had issues and some days regrets. Get to your doc and ask him for help! See your therapist and get things straightened out. Depression is a ugly beast but with the right meds you can overcome. I know because I suffer from that and anxiety. My kids are the reason I had this surgery and the reason I am doing so well. Get off your butt and call your doctor!! You or your kiddo dont deserve this!!!

Ok, tough love here. There is no "finished" at two months out.  NO SURGEON is going to even consider a reversal after only two months and no insurance company is going to PAY for a reversal unless your medical condition is dire.  On top of that, very few surgeons are trained to do one, so finding one can be an issue even if it IS a medical necessity.  Finally, revering a RNY doesn't really put you back she you were before surgery.  You can still have issues with eating and drinking and digestion.  You knew when you signed the surgical consent that there was a possibility for all sorts of complications, and that they surgery should -- for all practical purposes -- be considered permanent,  but you still signed it, so now you are stuck with it and have to figure out how to make it work.

Ok, now that THAT is out of the way, here's the compassionate part.  You are suffering from depression, and it is likely that all it will take to get you feeling MUCH better, and THINKING MORE CLEARLY, is to see your doctor and start on an antidepressant.  Post-op depression is fairly common. Your hormones are all out of whack, you aren't eating much, and your body is under tremendous physical stress.  You should make an appointment with your physician (probably your PCP, not your gastric bypass surgeon, because you will need follow up, especially if you need to switch meds) ASAP, though, because it takes at least two weeks for antidepressants to kick in, and many take 3-4 weeks to feel he full effect. So you need to start the process right away.  Some people also have to try a couple of different ones before they find one that works best.  I know that you are sugpffering from the "paralysis" that comes with depression and arent even going to want to put forth the effort to pick up the phone and call the doctor, but you HAVE to.  you do mot want to let the depression get so bad that you become suicidal and risk your son ending up without his mother permanently.  Every day you wait is another day that you and your son will continue to suffer needlessly.  I would also suggest considering seeing a counselor, even just for a short time, to help you get through this difficult period.  It can REALLY help to have someone with whom you can be 100% honest and who has an objective viewpoint.

First thing in the morning, pick up the phone and call the doctor!

Lora

What do you mean when you say "you're finished?"  If you are suicidal, please get help right away.  Like today.  Right now.

If your therapist isn't helpful, you can see another therapist.  It's not uncommon to have to see a few before you find the right one for you.

Have you talked to a doctor about trying some antidepressants?

I have chronic depression, although not associated with the surgery. You sound like you need immediate help--go to the ER if needed or call a crises line.  Will be praying for you. 

Remind yourself that it could have been triggered by any major life event--there are actually checklists that psychologists/therapists have patients fill out to see what major events have occurred within the past year.  AND--not all of these events are unhappy events (like a death) some of them are very good events (like a great new job or birth of a child).  Bottom line is that whether we think we should perceive a large change in our lives as "good" or "bad", they are still capable of eliciting a major depressive episode. Change is just very very difficult, especially when it affects us physically, and sometimes we just need help getting through it.  Those checklists suggest that it can take up to a year for even good events to be processed.

Do get help.  I could not have lived my life without the help of antidepressants and at times, therapists.  Will be praying for you, and please let us know how are you doing.

There was a time in my life when I could have been the poster child for depression. It took a while but with the help of a good counselor and a supportive family I got through it. I remember that darkness like it was yesterday, but I don't live in it anymore. I, too, am about two months out of surgery. Although I've had a relatively easy time of it, sometimes I feel that depression trying to sneak back in and sometimes I regret my decision to have surgery. What I don't do is give into it. I fight the depression and I focus on the positives in my life and with the surgery. Please, please, please don't give it to this evil beast. Fight it for your mom's sake, your son's sake and most of all, for yourself. Talk with your doctor, get a counselor, do whatever it takes. You can get through this and once you do, you'll be both happy and healthy!

I'm going to be a little tough here but what I'm going to say is said out of concern and caring. I get it that you are depressed and don't want to do anything but it's time to pull on your Big Girl Panties and do things for your 3 year old and stop focusing on YOU!!! I think when you start putting that child first and get out of your rut and go do fun things together you will have a much better outlook on your life.

Are you taking your vitamins? Make sure you are drinking your liquids and getting your protein in. I bet you got this surgery so you could be healthier and around for that child so it's up to you to follow the plan and be there for many many years.