Adventures in MIL land..... FML

Jennchap
on 4/3/11 10:20 am - CA

My crazy ass MIL stopped in… yeah lucky me. She always comes with gifts, weird ass gifts. Shes a little old Vietnamise lady and I know she means well but.... She's a lil too open with me about her sex life and as a madam shares with me the sex life of all of her "girls". If I have to hear one more story about her hot pocket I just might die. As if that were not bad enough she tells me how pretty I am and how unfortunate it is that I am so fat. What a sweetheart! Today though, she said, "Oh, Jen… you stunning… look so much better with out big face, before you just pretty… but little too fat"
So todays gifts:
*A vacuum for my "dirty floor" "get rid of cat hair, just suck it up.. so dirty little animal" she says to me. I have a dyson… and I love it! Sorry informercial vac you must die..

*More bananas than 45 monkeys could eat

*A huge thing of Bree (no one here eats that)

*The biggest Ham I've ever seen

*Some random sausage (the meat she says.. is from a friend who knows a friend.. who always has meet to sell at the swap meet?!?!!?)

*A a new jacket… a new 2X mens jacket…. that she must have 412 of as this is like the 10th ******g one she has given me…Do I appear unusually cold? All have met the same fate… the trash… seriously come on….. its a huge ass mans jacket… just cause Im as big as a man does not mean I have to dress like one FML…

*More Vietnamise candy than an entire ******g Vietnamese orphanage could consume

*And best of all a floor covered in all the plastic bags she brought in… and tons of wet paper towels she uses to wipe like everything she ******g touches…

Before she left she went to hug wild ass Max.. who head butted her (accidentally) and he freaked out… I said oh he bumps my nose all the time. Ill get you an ice pack… she says.. "You don't understand… my nose is fake! Still a nose shape? Still a nose shape?" she asks hysterically...Yes I say and send her on her way with a basketball shaped ice pack…. with both boys crying that she's taking their ice pack…
Hope your day was better little loves of mine…
Jen
I know you want my jacket..... haha

HW 275

SW 229

CW 136

Drea408
on 4/3/11 10:24 am - CA

VSG on 03/21/11

pure entertainment. i wanna meet her! haha

Kelby F.
on 4/3/11 10:24 am - Minot, ND

VSG on 11/10/10

Oh it's stories like this that make me soo happy I don't have a MIL to deal with...

Your jacket is hot... you should probably rock that thing on a daily basis!!!!!

~Kelby~ HW: 356 SW: 330 CW:231 GW: 175 I'm 5'6"

"Success means having the courage, the determination, and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be."

Jenny C.
on 4/3/11 10:30 am

VSG on 04/28/11

Wow.

Jenijeni
on 4/3/11 10:53 am

VSG on 02/01/11

Ok, seriously jealous of that jacket, but really I'm wondering about those tats on your feet! I wanna see a close up!

HW: 250 SW: 224 GW: 135 CW: 124

Jennchap
on 4/3/11 10:56 am - CA

VSG on 01/27/11

i put em in my post op pics babe! :)

HW 275

SW 229

CW 136

Jenijeni
on 4/3/11 12:39 pm

VSG on 02/01/11

Heading there to check em...

HW: 250 SW: 224 GW: 135 CW: 124

NewDawn50
on 4/3/11 10:54 am

VSG on 01/04/11

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! OMG, I'm crying!!!

Southernsleever
on 4/3/11 11:03 am

VSG on 10/08/10

Bahahaha too funny! I see all your bananas back there too.

5'6" Start-276 Goal-150 Weight loss Preop=5 Month 1=25 Month 2=10 Month 3=14 Month 4=3 Month 5=7 Month 6=9 Month 7=7 Month 8=7 Month 9=9 Month 10=7 Month 11=5 Month 12=5 Month 13=3 Month 14=4