Frustrating conversation!!!!

I think its really hard for anyone who hasn't struggled with obesity to understand what it is like to battle obesity.  Your family means well, but they really don't understand. So try not to let it get to you.  

I am one year out from my initial consultation and 8 months post surgery.  I've lost 172 pounds, and its hard to even describe how much weight loss surgery has changed my life.  I am no longer the heaviest person in the room.  I am so much more mobile and more energetic.  My confidence is improved.  I wish I could give you a crystal ball so you could see a year into the future, and know how successful WLS can be.  It really makes the weight loss possible.  It is only a tool, and you will have to stick to the plan, but the wls makes it possible.  Trust your judgment on this.

Best of luck,

Carol

Oh my goodness.  I know what you mean - one of my husband's daughters made a comment about taking the easy way out, and his own PCP doctor wanted him to do a "boot camp" instead to "learn how to eat properly".  Like after so many years of fighting his weight he didn't have a clue and it was just all ignorance!

Things like this just remind me how I'm blessed with a supportive family and set of friends.  I've shared with all my friends and church-mates, but not all of my coworkers - mostly because I don't want to have those conversations at work.  (Also, they are mostly guys who would freak out about discussing weight with a female!)  It has turned out a big surprise how many of them have family members who have had the surgery or are considering it.

Just hang in there and remember like someone else said - they are probably scared thinking about surgery and scared that you will change.  The pessimists there are probably thinking that they are trying to protect you.  

I think you are perfectly on base about the nutrition.  Now days, as people get older, most of us end up taking a few pills anyhow for medical conditions.  Taking vitamins and supplements are the same thing to me!

My family was rough on me too before surgery. But as they have watched the transformation begin and I'm no longer suffering from diabetes they realize this really was the best choice for me. It still bothers my Mom that I want to celebrate my weight loss. She is obese herself and although she is happy for me she is a little jealous. Can't blame her......... I would be too. 

Enjoy your journey. 

I made an appointment a few years ago to talk to a surgeon about WLS. I cancelled my appointment a few days before I was going to see the surgeon. I told myself that same lie, I can do it myself, it's the easy way out blah blah blah. Fact is here I am years later even more obese than I was before and I couldn't do it on my own. It's really not the easy way out. Unless they've done the research people don't generally understand the lifestyle changes and commitment it takes.

I've chosen to not share my WLS plans until after surgery (other than my husband and daughter). I talked myself out of it years ago, I don't want anyone else to try and talk me out of it and keep postponing it.

Good Luck and remember knowledge is key. Don't let anyone who is uninformed sway you if you've taken the time to do the research yourself.

And if it were really the easy way out? Out of what? out of the disease of obesity and all its co morbidities. Why would we not want to take the easier way with a tool that works? Why choose the harder way that does not guarantee success. Not that WLS guarantees success either, but it does give you a level playing field. Never in a million years would I have been able to get back down to a normal BMI without WLS and have a hope to maintain. So what is the problem with taking the easy way? I would ask them why they take the easy way in so many things in every day life that is taken for granted and not give it a second thought. Why drive? Why use a vaccuum cleaner, an iron, a garbage disposal, a dishwasher, an electric drill.. heck.. why use electricity? why use modern medicine? Is open heart surgery the easy way out too? It is the only way out... the only way to have a life. The same with WLS. It is the smart road to take and you are smart to consider it. Tell your family to either support or keep their pre historic opinions to themselves. 

This having been said, they are probably just speaking out of love and concern for you and their own fears of you having surgery and possible complications. Give them the benefit of the doubt. Strangely enough even though we are the ones going through this and we surely need support, our loved ones also need our support... 

Very true! Thank you!!! You guys all really helped me to resolve my issues with this-great support!!

The only way to shut these people up is to be SUCCESSFUL!   You get the surgery, you lose weight, you look great and feel great while doing it, and then keep the weight off.  My husband's family had a hard time with my decision because his sister has had two different WLS in the last 20 years and has failed at both of them.  So of course they thought the surgery didn't work.  Nope - SHE didn't work the tools she was given.  She never exercised, she drinks soda, she drinks with all her meals, etc. 

Now they are believers because they see that I'm energetic, healthy, have good color, don't look gaunt and I've lost all the excess weight.  They don't say crap to me at this point other than how good I look :-)  And frankly, a couple of them are real jealous because now I'm thinner than they are!