ashloretta

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~October 9, 2005~ "Frustrated"

Day 24
Ahhh, I had an appointment scheduled on Friday, Oct. 7 to attend a class on weight loss surgery but my dad took the message and didn't give me the right directions on how to get there. I missed the class and now I have to reschedule. I really hope that I won't get the run around with Kaiser. I have afraid this would happen, anyway, I will call them tomorrow. See what happens.
~October 27, 2005~ "Inspired"

1 month and 12 days

 Well it's 11:45 and i just got done reading Heidi Lauw's profile. I have never been so....so....inspired in my life. I finally have hope with Kaiser. I have been so negative about Kaiser from all that I have heard, but this profile has really inspired me to really move through the negativity I am thinking and just do it. I am going to go through with Kaiser thinking [knowing] that I will be approved! No more negative thinking about Kaiser. I feel like crying right now! I can not believe how happy i am! Tomorrow I have my B-City Surgery group. I am bringing my mom, cause she is going to be my total support, i need her to be as informed as me. She keeps me strong and I need her strength. I am just so happy to have found this site. Its really answered so many of my questions and had brought me to a level in my life, a level if powerfulness! I am so thankful. Thank you to everyone who has supported me with answers! Love ya all and I will update tomorrow after the group meeting.

 
Christmas 2004

 
In August of 2005 at a concert

~October 28, 2005~ "Enlightened" 
1 month and 13 days
OMG! I am so excited that I don't know where to start! Or at least I am more optimistic! Anyway, I had my obesity surgery group session this morning, and it really put me at ease about Kaiser and their approval of the surgery. Really you just need to get you foot in the door and take it from there. Anyway, they basically just gave an overview about the surgery and told us that 90% of patients that go for approval are accepted. That really excited me. So anyway, we filled out these forms for the physiologist to send into San Francisco . She said that it would only take her 1 1/2 weeks to get everything surveyed and then she would fax the forms to San Francisco and from there it would take about two months. So all I can do is wait. Anyway, I know that there is a chance that I will be denied, but I really just want to stay as positive as possible. Anyway, thanks for listening!

~October 31, 2005~ "I love my PCP!!"
1 month and 16 days
Today I made an appointment with my PCP. My Sciatica in my leg was bugging the crap out of me and I had never gone in when I was in pain, so I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to get this pain on record. I got it and my PCP was happy to see me and wished me luck with the approval of my surgery. I really am happy with everything right now. I am never going to say one more thing nasty about Kaiser anymore, they really are awesome!

~September 15, 2005~ "Getting Started" 
Day 1 
Today I applied for Blue Cross. I currently have Kaiser and I have tried to get surgery through them and no results. Plus there doesn't seem to be anyone that had Kaiser that is under 30 and has no serious co-morbidities......a serious co-morbidity should include the OPTION of dying or getting diabetes in the future! Not waiting to have it now! Anyway, I will try and update my progress, up to the surgery date and after. I know for myself that these journal entries really helped me.

 
My 18th Birthday

~September 21, 2005~ 
Day 6 
Well, nothing new has happen, except, oh yeah, I gained another 5 lbs. now I am at 320 lbs. Great. I love that kinda news! :( It just seems like such a downhill battle. I need to keep a positive breath in my body or else I will not be able to....anything productive. Anyway, I applied for Blue Cross last Thursday and still no word. I guess I will get something in the mail. Anyway, "tomorrow is another day...."

~September 25, 2005~ "Rejected!"
Day 10 
Well...tonight I got in the mail a rejection from Blue Cross. This is what it says... "Some medical conditions, either alone or in combination with the cost of medication, present uncertain medical underwriting risks. In view of these risks, we find we are unable to offer you enrollment at this time. Our decision was based on the following health history: *A height of 5'9" and a weight of 300 pounds, exceeds our morbidly obese medical underwriting weight guidelines." I guess I will just keep on it with Kaiser. I am going to make an appointment with my PCP on Monday for another consultation, I told him I wanted the surgery about 1 year ago and he told me that because I didn't have diabetes and my blood pressure was high but not high enough, that I would need a sleep apnea test. So I got my phyc evaluation and forgot to turn the sleep apnea test in, so I need to make sure and get that done. But in the mean-time, I am going to apply for Health-Net, and see if I get accepted there. A friend of mine that had the surgery went from Kaiser to health-net so I will see my luck there.

Anyway, I am a bit bummed. I was hoping this would be it. I just got done talking with my mom in the car on the way home tonight about the surgery and how excited I was about applying for Blue Cross, then we pick up the mail and I am rejected! I will try and not get depressed about it. But I want this so bad and it seems like the obstacles are never ending.

 
oldest sister, second oldest sister, my niece, my sister-in-law, and me

 
about 310 lbs, I love how skinny I look in this Pic!!!

~September 27, 2005~ "Moving on with current insurance: Kaiser" 
Day 12 
Today I made my appointment with my PCP. It's tomorrow at 2:30pm. I am so excited and nervous. I meet with him about 1 year ago and I think it was my belief and fear that stopped me from having the surgery. But I am determined now, and I am going to meet with the doctor tomorrow and be firm with him about it.

~September 30, 2005~ "Good visit with PCP" 
Day 15

Had my appointment today with my PCP. The nurse was so annoying, she told me that I was too young and she totally encouraged me not to do it and gave me some small horror stories about a friend of hers that had the surgery and is skin and bones now and another friend the is having a some problems and wished that she never had the surgery. AAAHHHHH! I have to give myself a small pep talk to keep my positive about having the surgery.

But what really made me happy was my PCP; he is so nice and even told me that my BMI could qualify me to have the surgery because I am at 47. And my blood pressure is somewhat high, so....... who knows. He referred me to a sleep apnea study and a behavioral study and he told me that we will go from there!