awbartley

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Today is a beautiful day. Life is good. I go tomorrow for my 6 week evaluation. I am eating foods, and tolerating them all. I have had no complications, no food intolerences or anything. I can eat eggs, drink milk, and eat cheese with no problems. My bruising is all gone and so is my pain. Ocasionallly I feel a little pulling on my left side, but it is going as well. I have a new job. I am working with a friend doing architectural drafting and design. I am 60 lbs down and have slowed down a little. I feel like when I get in the gym again, it will help. My favorite thing food wise is pretzels and mustard or steamed veggies. I am doing well on my protein as i am using a power packed 3 oz suppliment that has 42 grams. I drink 1/2 of one everyday. God is my strength, and although I don't speak to him as I should, I know he is still there. I owe my life to him, my wife, and Dr. Cook. Peace be with all........Adam

I started to eat some semi-solid foods yesterday. I am doing ok. I have to make myself eat however. Although foods look and taste great, it just seems like a chore to eat. I think my foods need to be mashed up a little more. It seems I get a little queesy after a few bites. I have to wait a while before trying again. Right now I can't eat an entire egg. I feel I really need the nutrition though. I am doing the best I can. It is really difficult to keep up with when I need to eat. I fell full all the time, even when I dont eat, like I am taking in too much air. I wanted to touch a little on my bruising. I have a little longer rib cage than most, so in turn, I have an extra hole, and a lot of bruising because of the extent he had to work. I was in surgery for almost 5 hrs. Good thing they do not charge by the hour, huh.

Today is a glorious day! I start my smooth consistency diet. I am able to try mashed potatoes today. I can have LF peanut butter, crackers, LF cheese, ect. I am reasonably excited considering I have had no solid foods in 3 weeks. Its sortof sad that I am that excited over food.

Ok, so here I am 6 days post op. I am a little sore. I walk everyday, not far yet, but I move. I check my vitals 2 times daily and use my Incentive Spirometer hourly (when I remember). I lost 28 lbs. on the pre-op liquid diet. Right now I feel like I want to eat something, like a pizza, but it always passes. I think that the pre-op helps with the food withdrawels. I am keeping diligent on my liquids, but am having a lot of trouble getting my nutrients and liquids, but I understand that it takes a while. So far, So good!

How many people who read this have said, or knows of someone who has said, " I may be fat, but I am happy!"? Well, I am here to destroy this myth right now, once and for all. Is anyone REALLY happy? If you look way down, deep inside yourself and ask that question, you will find the truth, staring you in the face, and it is not pretty. That truth is locked deep inside it's fatty cell, cowering, because we know and it knows that it is a hell of a lot easier to be the funny fat kid, than to own up to the hard facts of reality and lose weight. I AM FAT!  There I said it, and there is a satisfying freedom that comes along with it. I am not just fat, but in the medical classification of morbid obesity. Does that not scream at you, "Hey, Fatty your sick!"? Here I am according to society, and apparently my doctors, grotesquely obese, or thats how we feel anyway, and no matter what I do, I get fatter. All I have to do is exercise and watch what I eat, right. I wish It was that easy. For me, trying to lose weight in this manner is the same as telling a deaf man that all he has to do is listen. I have a disibility. At this crossroads of happy and truth, we realize something about ourselves that no one else sees. I am unhappy! "No, not me, I am the happiest person I know, or am I."? For so long we wear a veil called deception, so desperate to fit in one way or the other we turn to humor into the force that gets us through the day. "Wow, he is hilarious"! This gives us the illusion of happiness. You see, fat people are the best magicians in the world. From and early age we are able to "trick" people into thinking that we are always happy, but down inside lies the bitter truth, we go to bed wishing we were something else. I remember thinking how I would give up my personality, just for a chance to be thin. We are raised by the misconception that it is ok to be different, to be big, thats the way God made us. Sure, easy for people to say, but actions are far louder than words. I hardly think that God made me order all of those cheesburgers and fries over the years. Anyway, to the point, I have been fat for most of my life. I lost some weight one time, and felt great. I was still FAT however. Now i am 25 yrs old, and weight 325 lbs. It ENDS NOW, ONCE AND FOR ALL!! The lie is over. I am fat, and very unhappy, but i am scheduled for RNY gastric bypass in March. Soon i will be able to remember the first 25 yrs. of my life as the past, the old days, and can continue my life at a healthy 180 lbs (my goal weight). Not to sound negative about being overweight, but the truth will set you free, in more ways than you know.
                               - Adam