Trying to Breathe

Oct 25, 2012

I have just begun.

I have done my research and know that I need the help and the VSG is the right surgery for me. I'm trying to breathe, figuratively and literally. I haven't even had my 1st doctors appointment. My insurance only requires me to meet BMI rules and a psych eval. I have no question about being approved. I have great insurance. I'm nervous, but not about being approved or my life after surgery. I'm just terrified of the surgery itself. I've never had surgery of any kind. Not even a single stitch. Well, I lie. I have had stitches from having my children, but I guess since I never had any complications, I never considered my giving birth as anything dangerous; Though I know that it truly can be. I am worried about complications. I have a disabled husband and 4 children. What if something happens? What if the worst happens? What if not the worst, but the second worst happens? I am the bread winner in the house; What if something happens and I can no longer work or God forbid, I DIE!?! These are my biggest worries. More than my life changes or the surgery. I worry for my family.

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